PCO.Spvnky:
... when it comes down to running a game he becomes mister anal retentive. Yet when we get into a game on rpol I have to try to get him to NOT pull every shenanigan in the rules that he can think of (btw I like pretty high powered games).
I'm not sure you realize this, those two tendencies go hand in hand, one provokes the other. I played LG (Living Greyhawk--for D&D 3.x) and I HAD to by definition put on that hat, since it was one of the few sanctioned and therefore globally universal gaming convention games, there were others, but none I saw run as smoothly.
In home games, which was 70% of my gaming diet, that straw didn't come out. If anything I restricted my self "Oh you don't mind me cleaving on a n Attack Opportunity?! really? Okay, sure I'll take that AoO" and as a GM, as long as no player felt neglected, I let them powerhouse and destroy my world and NPCs, that was one of functions of that, is for the players' destruction. The PCs were "the straw".
In LG though, nope. It was totally different. You had a huge spike into thr high percentile mini-mods, which the group I was friends with wanted to do. I also got quite bit of free stuff from running mini-cons at the LGS, so of course I did, but that meant being nit-picky down to if you paid for your upkeep, or had sunrods versus torches. Those were
not the same thing and were treated as differently as the game could consider it. People tried to cast sending in battle, people did all kinds of things, but I was quick to rattle off this obscure rule or that. Which I refrained from in home games unless the GM was truly curious and asked me (which yes, I did offer to help the GMs with page numbers if nothing else).
On the flip side, I played THE single highest intelligence PC wizard in Dyvers. I was hot straw. So when GMs would say "That's not legal" I would pull out my certs and explain to them how, by great amount of luck and persistence, yes in fact I do have a 33 Intelligence at 12th level.
Knowing rules and "tricks" is like knowing a machine. You can do things other people won't or even shouldn't. Look at some machine artists that make fine crafts with industrial equipment, or the contest with heavy machinery where they do things like backwards obstacle courses and popping a balloon on someone's head. The same is true of game mechanics. They "know" what is possible, and so are that much more strict outside their knowledge, and very well they could be in the wrong. I've memorized verbatim dozens of pages in game books, but even I sometimes get things wrong on other pages, I though I knew.
when they are players, these people almost unconsciously expect a GM to call "when" and will argue up and down like a court lawyer.
There was an asinine episode of a T.V. show I only saw three clips of and never spent more time on, called Pawn Stars. In it this guy walks into the pawn shop, where the T.V. show was centered on. Regular joe sells a baseball pennant. Pawn owner asks the normal questions, one is "how much do you want for it?" Which the guy names a reasonable price, and I kid you not, the pawn owner says "Yeah, that is actually fair, but I would feel bad if I didn't haggle" as if perfunctorily, and so undercuts the seller by 20% just to "haggle" and the guy was slightly upset. Rightfully so. There are players/GMS like that. They expect and NEED an out of game struggle between players and GM(s). But most people avoid that like the plague. These people don't pick and choose their battles. In like company it's great fun, but when they're the only one, it's a pain and everyone suffers, least of all including them.
That's the thing. Know your company. At least with the immediate participants. It's something my X-friend Greg didn't learn. He wanted every game to be about him, and his character and how he was getting away with murder, and flaunted how HE wouldn't have allowed stuff.
Maybe your friend likes the competition? Maybe he really is just overly excited and gets carried away? Maybe he truly doesn't know? But how is going to know if someone doesn't tell him. Though probably you have. All I can say is meticulous GMing to the point of being asinine and making "broken" characters share the same skill set. They very much go hand in hand. Though they don't have to, they often provoke the other.
For me, I had to part company with Greg. He was very competitive...but to boot was a chronic manipulator and liar. *chuckles* He'd invite me over to play cards, when in fact he was wanting a ride to his house from work, a ride to the gas station to get cigarettes, and a ride to bank, this and that. "I thought we were going to play cards, V" "Greg! I got you at 6 PM! it's now 2 AM, I dunno about you, but I'M GOING HOME!" "Well I can't walk from here" "Call someone else mate".