In reply to silveroak (msg #127):

That one scores you 1x Internets, sir. I nearly spit my drink on the moniter when I read it.

480. I will stop describing NPCs as "yeah, he's basically got WIZARD stamped on his forehead".
481. This goes for every class, not just wizards.
482. I will not play a PC with his class name tatooed on his forehead when one of the players who complained about the above rules takes a turn at GMing.
483. Nor will I play a PC with a different class name tatooed on his forehead, no matter how amusing the idea of a wizard labeled BARBARIAN is.

484. I will not keep secretly hoping that someone will start a game that includes most of these conventions as sort of anti-game/ come to destroy mankind/ wonderful alternative to seriousness.

485. I will not keep secretly hoping there really is a game where there are actual girls, so I can test out rule 468.

486. I will not keep hoping that the kids in that cartoon who are 'after me lucky charms' will catch the Leprechaun and beat the hell out of him.

487. I will realize that last one has nothing to do with roleplaying and I will try to stop making up ones like that.
This message was last edited by the user at 17:04, Sun 04 Apr 2010.

488. I will not repeat things I am not permitted to do on this list.
489. I will not repea-OW!

490.  Hum "it's a brand new day" (from Dr. Horrible) when the GM asks if I will play nice with the other players today...

491: I am no longer permitted to introduce  poser gang devoted to the Waltons in my cyberpunk games.
( this applies to "the real McCoys, Gunsmoke, and F-troop" as well.

492. I will not convince male games I am a myth
493. I will not sharpen my wits, tongue and play mind games with male players. They are not high enough level.
494. I will not convince male text rpg players I am male too and then comment 'where are all the girls?'
495. I will not 'smile' that nasty smile that says we are all going to hell in a hand basket.
495. b. Especially not at GM

496 As a GM I will never have another magic shop...anywhere.  It is way too tempting for the PCs not to think about robbing.

497. As a GM stop offering my player's wishes from evil DJinni only to twist it on them. "Oh you want a million gold? Great! Your wish is my command! *POOF* You are encased inside of a million gold and asphyxiate.."

498.  When dividing up captured weapons, I will no longer give the biggest gun to the craziest character.   Just to see what happens.

499: I will cease casting 'hanging' spells to attack deific entities when my character is utterly reliant on the more powerful characters in the group to keep me from being slowly turned inside out over an open fire in retribution.

500: When, by some bizarre confluence of circumstances and Fate, I manage to cast a spell that somehow manages to massively humiliate an immensely powerful enemy, I will not seek to repeat the same spell, just to make sure he knows it wasn't an accident (even though it was).

501. Teen age girl is not a weapon. I can not duel wield.
502. Exposing someone to certain celebrities does not qualify as a mental attack.
503. I will not destroy significant monuments and buildings to get the cities attention to the war.

502. I will no longer be the familiar of a dragon.
503. Nor have a dragon as familiar.

on behalf of a player:

504.  I will stop playing adolescent girls who somehow manage to have mad sharpshooting skills, mad mental powers, or mad anything that doesn't fit in with the pesonality, story, and capabilities of a fruiting fourteen year old.
504b.  I will stop whining when the GM is actually smart and won't let me play such a ridiculous character.

for a GM friend:

505.  I will actually THINK before letting players into my game, and not let any half-appled, fudged up character concept in just because the player has boobs.  I will not repeat the half-fae Garou incident.
This message was last edited by a moderator at 16:28, Tue 06 Apr 2010.

re:505 what if said player offers visual confirmation of boobs?

Hey suckering GMs by being female can be very productive!

506. I should not sucker GMs by being female
507. I will not use the female + shiney = happy clause.
508. I should not role play every 4 weeks in the game that 'time'

509.  I will not allow female characters to be portrayed as PMSing.  Same fantasy rules as STDs - it doesn't exist.  :p
 - Exception: Allowed in the case of a female barbarian inciting Rage.  Will allow temporary bonuses to pre-determined rolls.  May only be used once every 4 weeks game time.
 - Subsection a:  GM is allowed to make circumstance rolls to determine if said female barbarian is "on schedule"

510.  I will make the application of such things as barbarian PMS rage so complicated that my players will think twice about using it.

Eh, that's just unrealistic. STDs and "time" are a lot of fun in RPGs. Especially STDS :o))

510. I will NOT let my players get away with visiting certain establishments without rolling for STDs :)

Lwaxy, I believe that's 511 you posted.

512. I will no longer create 10 NPCs for every PC I have (relating to RPol).

513. I will not make it my goal to have the most posts in the game. Including the sum total made by GM and their characters.

Why not.... honestly, that's what ends up happening to me in most games.

For some friends
514: I will not attempt to cure Paradox Bedlam with with Mind magics. No matter what I think, that is exactly like going 'hey, you have Ecstasy problems.... have some Ecstasy.

515: Acting out my Bedlam's exactly is not an excuse to gain Willpower points.

516: I will not throw my dice at the players as they annoy me. I will not buy metal dice specifically for the purpose.

517: My dice do not have feelings.... they do not care if I use the RPOL Dice roller for 3 months as I am not in a table top game. My string of bad luck is just that.... bad luck.... I will not roll all my dice on the table to prove to them that I do care about them.... the noise so many dice make is distracting for the players and doing so repeatedly will force the GM to do horrible things to my character.

518: My character being dead and the party being in the process of resurrecting him is not an excuse to annoy the GM.... you can suffer horrible things even dead and there are some fates worse then death.

519: Fireballing myself while I have Immunity to Fire on does not count as a kamikaze for roleplaying purposes.

520: If 1 axe didn't work, 99 more won't either.

521: I cannot dump a Bag of Holding that's full of Necklaces of Fireballs and have them all go off simultaneously.

523: I cannot reduce a Bag of Holding to 1 HP and then throw it into a monster's mouth and let their stomach acid finish the rest.

524: I cannot throw a Bag of Holding and Portal Hole into a monsters mouth and "wait for the magic to happen".

525: I do not automatically crit a monster just because I'm inside it's tummy.

526: I am not the bastard son of Pelor back before he was all high and mighty god of the sun.

527: Shouting "booya" after every kill does not earn roleplaying XP.

528: I cannot have "that's what she said" as my deity and motto anymore.

529: I cannot have "your mom" as my alignment anymore.

530: I am not allowed to play a lawful alignment, because I am a chaotic player.

531: A gnomish illusionist is acceptable, but he cannot speak in an Irish accent.

532: I cannot accuse my party members of stealing from me without evidence. They are not after me lucky charms.

533. I will not try to ingest a power source larger than my head.

534: When playing in games that allow me to write my own spells, I will avoid spells that create miniature suns, or tie the force of the spell to the sun or stars as power sources.

535: I will not bicker with the GM when he wants to change a rule in a home-brew game because the loophole I exploited ended up massively overbalancing things in my favor (I don't do this, anyway...the bickering part, at least.  My friends love having me playtest games for them because of my knack for finding loopholes...)

535a: This also applies to things like setting hard limits on the number of luck points a player can accrue, the amount of character points that can be spent to enhance certain actions or effects, etc...

536. Super Robot Shows are not ‘proper inspiration’ for a gnome inventor.
537. I am no longer allowed to play a Chaotic Neutral gnome mad scientist
538. I am not to name my gnome “Kamina” ever again, and he does not have a katana.
539. I am not allowed to attempt to take over the world with giant mecha, and convert the squishies to the worship of Mecha Jesus.
540. Blowing up the moon for my own amusement is forbidden.
541. There is no such entity as Mecha Jesus, and he is not a proper deity for a for a standard D&D campaign.

542. I am never againt to prove to a newbie DM that the 3.5 Core is NOT balanced via oblitering everything in my path with a properly built CODzilla.
543. I am never again to attempt to prove to a DM that the Expanded Psionics Handbook is quite balanced in comparison to a CODzilla built strictly by Core rules.

544. I will not allow my vampire to walk about in the daylight (with limited powers) just because Bram Stoker and Francis Ford Coppola said so.
545. Anne Rice is not a reliable source of vampire lore to use in the World of Darkness.
545a. I will also not create a vampire by the name of Lestat on pain of pain.
545b. I will also refrain from making references to "Monty Python", "Princess Bride" and "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" while describing what I'm no longer allowed to do.