You are that legendary monster in all fairytales ^{Kirby! Fear the Kirby!!!}

everybody says 'aaaawwwww' when they see you, because you know they don't do that for cute people.  Cute people get the 'hey maybe we can go home together tonight'...

You don't have to look at people to turn them to stone - they only have to look at you.

People can't help use your name as an example in the ASWOT thread saying 'you know you are ugly when...'

You get lots of money for your existence because people feel like they should compensate you for living

...a person would usually ask your ethnicity, they instead as if you're human.

The government kidnaps you for radiation tests

you can't even stand to look at yourself in the mirror.

...people immediately forget you when they are not looking at you.  Not because you are Silence, it just because you are too ugly to remember.

...people who see you develop PTS disorder.

When people mistake you for a new species, or alien

Can we do a new one now? Like: You know you're a douche when--> ?

Your own eyes run away at the mere sight of you. Honestly, that is a terrifying prospect.

...*retch* "I just threw up a little." is how your mother reacts every time you enter the room.

When you try to go to any public building it spontaneously combusts.

a vote is cast about whether you are ugly and 67% or greater vote yes.

"Mirror Mirror on the wall who is the ugliest of them all?"  and the mirror replies with "did I ever tell you how intelligent and clever you are?"

your family is looking at old photos and saying things like "Oh this one looks like little freddy!" and when you peek over their shoulder you find that the old photos are actually the "family poop scrapbook".

you can't find anyone else who's uglier :(

you come home and even your dog isn't happy to see you.

(i just noticed that Lulu prayer suggested a change of subject so lets roll with it)

you're visiting your grandmother at the old folks home and take the remote from Vernon and disregard the complaints so you can watch the game.

New One!

You know you're wasting time when...

You reply to threads that haven't been active in years to increase a number that no one cares about!

...you attempt to seduce the Pope.

(OOC: I'm sorry Benny. I'll never do that again.)

You are trying to claim board royalty.

by...

...you try (and fail) to come up with creative postings after putting up over 41,000 posts.