[Char. Dev.] How Time Flies
The alarm clock sang. Comstock was already awake.
He swung his legs out of bed and felt the floor flex in response to his weight. From the flex, he guessed he was between 200 and 220 kg, which was a good omen for a good day ahead. He concentrated, tried to reduce his weight a few more kilograms, and breathed in. Today was going to be a good day.
His house was sparse, but not Spartan. One wall was covered with old license plates from all the states and countries he'd visited in his travels. Two rows of Nevada plates reminded him of a time when he swapped out plates on a regular basis. He pondered these plates while making coffee, just as he did every morning. When the coffee was done, he drank it, took his time feeling the strange flavorless carbon chains, and then put on a new set of clothes. His pajamas went into the wash.
Outside, he surveyed the landscape. Sand, rabbitbrush, bitterbush, and pine. Sunrise bathed the mountains in a warm amber, banishing the cold from the old timbers of the town’s abandoned buildings. His neighbors were mostly ghosts, for little Adaven's post office had closed in 1959, but surprisingly there were two families that still lived this far out. Decent people just trying to make their own life. Broken people that didn't get along with society. Comstock guessed that one of the two families concealed a government agent paid to keep an eye on him, but he tried not think about it. He did not see them often, anyway, and if one of them was a spook or an informant they were just doing their job. No reason not to make friends.
He went back inside and made a peanut butter sandwich, just as he did every morning while making his phone call. The agent on the other end of the phone thanked Comstock for his compliance, but remained professional. That was fine too. Comstock hoped that he'd get through one day, learn something about a spouse, kids, hobby, or something.
The peanut butter sandwich, like all things, possessed a soft consistency and no flavor. More than that, it lacked purpose: Comstock's body would go on with or without it, and the molecules were not particularly interesting or useful. They were white noise, as dull and uninteresting as the air. But Comstock was determined, and finished the sandwich anyway, trying to appreciate its subtleties.
Next, he hiked around his new land. It was not, in fact, his. Not by law. But since he lived there it had become his, and he cared what happened in it. This morning, some antelope passed nearby. This was unusual and worth noting, so Comstock wrote it down in a little pocket journal. When he was done, he flipped through the little journal, trying to see if he had spotted antelope here before. There were seventeen months of entries in this journal, little analog memories scribbled in no.2 pencil, but enough pages remained for at least 17 more. He wondered what his next journal would look like when this one was filled.
Adaven, Nevada. His new home. A ghost town for a rusty old man.
---
On his way back from his hike, Comstock noticed his mind wandering by the audible crunch of the ground at his feet. The further his mind wandered, the heavier his footsteps, until gravel splintered and sandstone buckled. Calming down took a bit of work, but he felt pretty human when he stepped in the door. A sprightly 150 kg.
Today was his third day without talking to someone. The nearest farm was 10 miles out, over the mountains, so he wasn't surprised. And he knew he could just call for Solitaire and she'd come visit if she was able. But after thinking it over, he decided he wasn't lonely enough to impose. He was just under a fey mood. A gremlin of the imagination, working at the gears, trying to break his routine. Indulging the gremlin, he took a long look in the bathroom mirror.
At 39 years old, Dillon Amargosa was not the man he had once been. Just after his eruption, he stood five feet and ten inches, lean and mostly muscle, but the shape that looked back from the mirror now stretched six feet and six inches from the floor. Gone was his youthful black stubble: now, follicles of oxidized silver passed for black-and-gray hairs, and only grew or shrank when he wanted. His once-tanned skin was also pale, loose with wrinkles and wear, barely hanging in there. Almost human ... to the naked eye at least. That's the way Comstock liked it.
Sixteen years a nova, Dillon had done it all. But now, at 39, Dillon barely saw anything of himself anymore. Comstock had overtaken it all, eaten every last organ, swallowed every last doubt. Comstock was the man that Dillon had aspired to be. Too late to aspire toward being someone else. He'd spent almost half his life becoming Comstock, the embodiment of the American Dream, an unkillable man who made wealth from nothing, who pushed frontiers and stood up for the helpless, and he didn't regret a bit of it. Not a bit of it. Not a bit of it.
Nostalgic, he unsealed a box from his closet and peered at the eufiber colony inside. It was still locked in the shape of his Vigilance uniform, the one patterned after his T2M uniform. Calmly, he prodded the sleeve with a finger and watched it coil up in revulsion. Rejection. After the incident with Buendia, when Project Proteus had turned eufiber into a weapon to sterilize and cripple nova-kind, Comstock's body had gradually come to recognize eufiber as a possible threat. He'd had to put the suit away to avoid reflexively destroying it. Perhaps symbolically, he could never put it on again. But like Solitaire with her old jacket, he somehow couldn't let it go.
---
The afternoon was dragging on, and Comstock made his second call. Again, the agent on the other end thanked him for his compliance. He made a simple dinner of flavorless cornbread and flavorless pork while listening to the Doobie Brothers. It wasn't so bad. His dad had listened to the Doobie Brothers too. Mom and dad were gone now, but lived on in these little rituals. The same but different with each listening.
Dad had gotten sick. That was the straw that broke the camel's back. The moment that he realized he was strong enough to hold up the world but too small to wrap his arms around it. A miniature Atlas, struggling to square up for a proper lift. Dad had gotten sick just like Vigilance had gotten sick, and nothing was going to save either one. Not without changing either one into something else entirely. He had sent Phantasm and Slider and the rest of his friends away and cut a deal with the authorities: if they'd let him back into the US to be with his dad at the end, he'd cash in all his remaining favors and retire. Work with them to find someplace he could live in peace, away from the public, so they could keep an eye on him and know he wasn't still up to old tricks. It wasn't like they could imprison him anyway. He was the one who'd picked Adaven. He hadn't been there before, but it was enough like Indian Springs, where he'd grown up, and the name had made him laugh.
Nevada spelled backwards. Perfect place to escape a world turned upside down.
The Teragen rampage after Bahrain had shaken things up, but revealing Project Proteus had not gone as expected. It turned out that people distrusted novakind a little more than they feared their own paranoid rulers. He and Vigilance had worked to expose everyone's dirty laundry, but compared to a billionaire who ignited the air on contact or a blind and delusional superman who could annihilate cities at will, what were some regulations and biological weapons? Would Dillon Amargosa, the man, have really questioned the morality and existence of a sterilization weapon and a secret prison in space? Of secret government intelligence agencies producing superweapons? To cover their tracks at Bahrain the Teragen had bent the fabric of the universe, and even if baseline people could not see how or why, they somehow knew. A line had been crossed. Their new beginnings could never truly be new beginnings, because the future refused to change.
So many possibilities had ended that day. Gale flew away to terraform a planet or stop Climate Change. Impetus never became president of the United States. Gravitas relocated his work and the alien probe from Mars to some distant lair. The Second Generation novas were swept away, hidden somewhere where Utopia and Proteus could never harm them again. Directors Thetis and Laragione were never brought to justice. Divis Mal and his Manus vanished to a temple on the moon. Doctor Zero never returned, though its cultists still saw it everywhere. Comstock and Hell Kraken had tangled with the criminal mastermind, Chagan, but never uncovered the identity of the mysterious Stranger that left breadcrumbs to help them. The Aeon Society transformed itself and hid once again. World governments that had come together under Utopia's aegis slowly grew more paranoid and isolationist. Some old friends died. Some even became enemies.
His "Movement" had been doomed from the start, too awkward and idealistic to ever stand a chance against the whole world. He'd been a poor manager, and hated all the lying, the cloaks and daggers. Without a flag and a clear enemy, he was almost useless ... or at least felt useless. All Vigilance really accomplished, in the end, was to alienate some people, stop a few atrocities, and help smuggle some novas away from the authorities. Was that enough? Comstock supposed that it had to be. In the end, what else was there?
He remembered a long car ride with Solitaire. How she'd chided him back then. How free Gale had seemed after her time in Chrysalis. How Phantasm had risked trusting him with her secrets just after they joined T2M. How Frostburn had burned out. How Prodigal and Pax had found religion. He remembered loading rubber bullets into an M4 carbine. Remedial classes with Dr. Bharati. Arguments with Impetus. Flirting with Lydia Divine. A nuclear sunrise in Colombia. A few different fights with Crimson Dawn. Walking in space without a suit. He remembered all that and more, and realized suddenly that it was dark. His afternoon had become night. He'd spent it all remembering. Standing stock still.
---
Comstock picked up some junk and dusted. Vacuumed. Lifted some weights. Cleaned off his poor worn-down boots. Then changed into pajamas for bed.
He wasn't lonely. Not exactly. Just tired. Lost. Hoping for some humanity. He knew some of his friends were out there. Playing at godhood or wandering the stars. Fighting the good fight or succumbing to temptation. He knew he could just ignore the government and walk out of here to go join them. Few novas on Earth could stop him. But he'd seen a lot of killing, a lot of destruction, and a lot of things no man should. He’d played hero games too long, tried to stand tall for all mankind, and made too many mistakes. He'd been there for it all, watched the new world take shape. A great fire rising from the wreckage of the fallen Galatea. He still couldn't decide if he was fuel or ember.
He set his alarm and got into bed. Though tired, he wouldn't sleep. He closed his eyes anyway. And promised himself that tomorrow was going to be a good day.
This message was last edited by the player at 18:56, Fri 17 Feb 2017.