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Chapter 1: Signs from God.

Posted by FacilitatorFor group archive 0
Facilitator
GM, 180 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Fri 9 Apr 2010
at 17:04
  • msg #150

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Solomon sputters at Tobias's admonitions. I — I'm fighting on the side of RIGHTEOUSNESS! GOD sent the creature, not I. God sends his soldiers to fight for him, so killing in His name is ok! His glittering protection is now not much more than rags, and his translucent shield is sluggish to dart about; Tobias's shot rings true, hitting the preacher in the left shoulder. His eyes dart about wildly and catch Frank moving towards him.

NO! Earl's wife's pain is not my fault. His voice is shrill and raspy, as of a man on the edge. Satan hurts the innocents, not me. God wouldn't let Satan work through a preacher. I pray to Him every day and every night, and He shows me the way. He swings his gun at Frank and fires, almost seeming surprised when the gun goes off. The shot hits a Bible two pews over, spraying a small explosion "thou shalt nots" and "begats".

McGray stalks closer, and pipes up, Come on, Solomon. Just put the gun down and this will all be over with. You don't need to hurt anybody else. Solomon roars and charges towards McGray. The officer fires, hitting Solomon in the hip, but the preacher is unphased and charges right past McGray, towards the edge of the web.

Larry and Adele, too far into the webs to have a good understanding of what is going on, each give their own cries of relief after finally freeing themselves from the webs.

S: 22 Damage

[Private to Francis 'Frank' Decourcey: Your diplomacy check failed to turn him to your side, but it did cause him to lose a bit of faith in his protections, thereby lowering them some more.]

[Private to Tobias Byrne: It doesn't take a religion check to know that he's not quoting from scripture any longer.]

[Private to GM:
Solomon: 22/44 left shoulder, right hip

Next round: Larry will attempt to move towards Solomon, Solomon will cast burning hands, hoping to catch as many people as possible, giving preference those in the web.

Solomon 3 rounds left before reloading
Solomon Def 23 (+2 dex, +6 class, +2 armor, +3 shield) (-3 armor/shield fade)
0-lvl: message, light, mage hand
1-lvl: mage armor, magic missile, shield, burning hands
2-lvl: darkvision, invisibility, web
]
Tobias Byrne
player, 104 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Fri 9 Apr 2010
at 18:57
  • msg #151

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"Oh come now, Solomon." Tobias straightened, pointing his gun at the man but not pulling the trigger. "'Killing in his name is ok?' Is that the best rationalization you have? I think it's time to stop fighting and start repenting. Sack cloth optional."


13:55, Today: Tobias Byrne rolled 19 using 1d20+3. Diplomacy check.
13:56, Today: Tobias Byrne rolled 2 using 2d6. worst action point ever.

HP: 28/38 AC:15

This message was last edited by the player at 21:42, Mon 12 Apr 2010.
Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 104 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Mon 12 Apr 2010
at 21:40
  • msg #152

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"Last chance," snarled Frank. "You surrender now, or we gun you down where you stand. Your choice."

He lined up Solomon in the sights of his weapon, fully intent on dropping the man if he made any move other than capitulating. He had started to thoroughly dislike the Reverend, but that didn't mean he just wanted to gun him down.

OOC: 22:34, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 32 using 1d20+13. Intimidate roll vs Solomon.

Current HP: 40 Current Def: 19

Facilitator
GM, 182 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Tue 13 Apr 2010
at 17:26
  • msg #153

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

The preacher is now too far gone to consciously respond to reason, and he does not heed your attempts to talk him down. Something deeper inside him, however, starts to slip. His shield has faded so much that it's almost impossible to see, and his illusory armor is nothing more than tattered strings sickly revolving around him. With a crazed look in his eye he sticks his gun in the waistband of his slacks then starts muttering something. He builds in fervor and you can hear that he's speaking in Latin again. As he reaches a fevered pitch he switches back to English: And there went out fire from the LORD, and devoured them, and they died before the LORD!

At this fire springs forth from Solomon's outstretched fingers, enveloping Tobias and Glen, then dying away as soon as it appeared. The sheriff is able to dodge behind a pew, but Tobias is trapped by the webs and takes full force from the flames. As if that weren't enough, the webs themselves catch on fire, burning away at a rapid pace. An arc of fire burns outwards through the webs, leaving behind smoldering hymnals and stringy ash.

Glen stands up from behind the pew and fires again at Solomon, but the preacher's sluggish shield still has enough life in it to deflect the shot.

[Private to Tobias Byrne: Know (Theo+Philo) (35): the verse is from Leviticus 10:2. The people being burned to death weren't just any sinners, they were Nadab and Abihu, sons of Aaron, Moses's nephew, who improperly placed profane items on God's alter. The verse is about worshiping God presumptuously and in such a manner as God prescribes, not about cleansing sinners.
Arcane Lore (17): He cast Burning Hands
Reflex Save (9): Fail! You take 12 damage (fire). If you want to attempt an action point you need at least a 6 to take half damage. You also take an additional 5 fire damage from the webs catching on fire. The up side is you are now free and don't have to worry about getting stuck in them again.
Diplomacy (21): doesn't seem to have any effect on his attitude, but his shield fades slightly at your words.

11:20, Today: Facilitator rolled 35 using 1d20+15. know: theo+philo.
11:27, Today: Facilitator, on behalf of Tobias Byrne, rolled 17 using 1d20+15. know: arcane lore.
11:21, Today: Facilitator, on behalf of Tobias Byrne, rolled 9 using 1d20+5. reflex.
]

[Private to Francis 'Frank' Decourcey: Intimidate (32): doesn't seem to have any effect on his attitude, but both his shield and armor fade slightly at your words.]

[Private to GM:
Solomon: 22/44 left shoulder, right hip
Glen 6 damage

Solomon 3 rounds left before reloading
Solomon Def 20 (+2 dex, +6 class, +1 armor, +1 shield) (-6 armor/shield fade)
0-lvl: message, light, mage hand
1-lvl: mage armor, magic missile, shield, burning hands
2-lvl: darkvision, invisibility, web
]
Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 105 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Tue 13 Apr 2010
at 21:06
  • msg #154

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"Damn you," muttered Frank, squeezing a couple of shots off at the preacher.

He'd tried to talk Solomon down, but it was clear that the man was too far into religious fervour to listen to reason. The flames presented a danger to them all and it was clear the only way out of this now was violence; Frank intended to fire upon the Reverend until he stopped twitching.

OOC: Attack: 18 Damage: 15
Using Point Blank Shot, Double Tap, spending 1 Action Point to boost attack.

22:01, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 10,15 using d20+6,3d8+1. Attack, Damage vs Rev Solomon.
22:02, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 8 using 2d6. Action Point spent to boost attack roll.

Current HP: 40 Current Def: 19

Tobias Byrne
player, 105 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Tue 13 Apr 2010
at 21:19
  • msg #155

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Tobias went into a defensive huddle when the flames engulfed him. Smoldering, he stood. It was regrettable, but the man was gone. There was nothing they could probably do to help him.

Still, the effort had to be made. After Frank's shot went off, he let out a yell and dove for the reverend. Most of the spells he was unleashing would be useless if he couldn't move his hands.

You rolled 18 using 1d20+2 ((16)). Grapple check.
HP: 16/38   AC: 15

Facilitator
GM, 183 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Thu 15 Apr 2010
at 01:10
  • msg #156

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Frank's shots just barely miss the preacher, and Tobias is repelled by a quick punch straight to the jaw. Glen, catching on to what Tobias was attempting, holsters his weapon and lunges at the preacher, knocking him to the ground. They struggle against each other, but eventually the sheriff gains an unsteady upper hand.

The fire continues to burn through the web, catching Larry in its blaze. Finally free, he yells, Screw this shit! You guys are on your own! and makes his way around the outside and towards the front door.

OOC: Solomon is currently grappled by Glen, but not pinned.

[Private to Tobias Byrne: You were foiled by an unarmed attack of opportunity, but Solomon dealt only nonlethal damage.]

[Private to GM:
Solomon: 22/44 left shoulder, right hip
Glen 6 damage
Larry 3 damage

Solomon 3 rounds left before reloading
Solomon Def 20 (+2 dex, +6 class, +1 armor, +1 shield) (-6 armor/shield fade)
0-lvl: message, light, mage hand
]
Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 106 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Mon 19 Apr 2010
at 10:16
  • msg #157

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Seeing that Glen had grabbed the preacher, Frank moved in to assist him. It was the kind of thing he'd done dozens of times during his time as a cop, but never against a 'wizard'.

OOC: Frank is joining the grapple. No AoO for Solomon, and Frank grabs automatically, so just an opposed grapple check.

Grapple Check: 19

11:11, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 15 using 1d20+4. Opposed Grapple Check vs Solomon.
11:15, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 4 using 2d6. Action Point Spent.

Current HP: 40 Current Def: 19

Facilitator
GM, 184 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Mon 19 Apr 2010
at 20:42
  • msg #158

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

OOC: In case it makes a difference to Tobias's action, Frank won the opposed grapple check and is now grappling Solomon as well.
Tobias Byrne
player, 106 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Mon 19 Apr 2010
at 20:45
  • msg #159

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Tobias reeled back from the punch and, seeing Frank rush past him and tackle the preacher, he turned to Larry and raised his gun. "Freeze!" He shouted, really hoping that just once someone would listen.
Facilitator
GM, 185 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Mon 19 Apr 2010
at 23:40
  • msg #160

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Larry is far enough away from Tobias that he decides to take his chances and run for it. He dashes behind the webs and you hear the front door open then slam shut.

Adele yells, Don't worry, he won't get away. and runs after him.

Solomon struggles, and slips free of Glen's grasp. Luckily, with Frank's help, the preacher doesn't get free. Glen tries to regain his hold, but Solomon kicks him away.

Dammit, Preacher, stop struggling. We've got you more than surrounded here.

Solomon does not respond.

OOC: Frank is grappling with Solomon, but Glen failed his check so he is no longer grappling. If you want to roll opposed checks in future rounds, Solomon's bonus is +2.
Tobias Byrne
player, 107 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Sun 25 Apr 2010
at 16:36
  • msg #161

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Tobias draws a pair of handcuffs from his bag. "get his hands together," he called to Frank and Glen. Waiting for an opportune time, he darts in ahdn slaps the cuffs on Solomon.

I've got no clue what to roll for that.
Facilitator
GM, 186 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Sun 25 Apr 2010
at 19:56
  • msg #162

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

If Solomon is pinned, you can place the handcuffs on him without rolling a check. You've readied an action to handcuff him as soon as either Frank or Glen manage to pin him.
Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 107 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Sun 25 Apr 2010
at 20:32
  • msg #163

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Seeing Toby move in with the handcuffs, Frank shifts his grip on Solomon in an attempt to hold him still. He tries to pull one arm up behind his back to force him down and put a knee into the man's back to hold him there.

"Stop strugglin'!" snapped Frank. "It'll hurt a lot less."

He'd given up all hope of a peaceful resolution to this confrontation, so seeing that things were moving to a point where they might be able to take the reverend alive was very satisfying.

Hell knows what they were going to do with him once they'd slapped the cuffs on, though. Frank was pretty certain there weren't any laws against summoning creatures from another plane and setting them loose on the general populace, even if there should be.

OOC: Grapple Check to attempt Pin: 21

21:21, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 16 using 1d20+5. Pin Attempt vs. Solomon.
21:21, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 5 using 2d6. Action Point spent to boost Pin attempt.
Current HP: 40 Current Def:16 (Grappling, so still 19 vs Solomon)

Facilitator
GM, 187 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Sun 25 Apr 2010
at 22:04
  • msg #164

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Solomon, having spent his whole life dedicated to one path, one train of thought, does not give up his struggles. He keeps squirming, not unlike a three year old throwing a temper tantrum, which keeps Frank from pinning him down. Glen jumps back into the fray and gets hold of the preacher's collar.

He's now grappled by both Frank and Glen.
Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 109 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Sun 25 Apr 2010
at 22:24
  • msg #165

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"Son of a..." muttered Frank, as the reverend managed to squirm his way out of being pinned to the floor.

He tried another shot at holding him still enough for Toby to slap the cuffs on. If Solomon managed to squirm out of it again, he was fully intent on beating the man into unconsciousness. It was no less than he deserved.

OOC: Second pin attempt, grapple check: 19

23:19, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 11 using 1d20+5. Another Pin Attempt.
23:19, Today: Francis 'Frank' Decourcey rolled 8 using 2d6. Action Point spent to boost Pin attempt.
Current HP: 40 Current Def:16 (Grappling, so still 19 vs Solomon)

Facilitator
GM, 189 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Mon 26 Apr 2010
at 04:14
  • msg #166

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Tobias and Frank look at each other, and through some unspoken signal they work with fluid movement and clockwork precision. Frank holds Solomon down and Tobias finds the exact split second to swoop in and cuff the struggling preacher.

This isn't over! Solomon yells, finally submitting somewhat to his final fate. You may have won this time, but GOD will win in the end. As you have judged me so, too, will He judge you. But unlike me, GOD will not be merciful. If you do not repent of your sins before your Judgment Day you will spend the rest of eternity smoldering in the bowels of Hell.

McGray stands up and dusts himself off just as the last of the webs burn away. The air smells like burning hair, fresh ozone, and recently fired fireworks. Well, what do we do now? Do you guys have like a secret bunker or something?
Tobias Byrne
player, 109 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Mon 26 Apr 2010
at 04:18
  • msg #167

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"Something like that." Tobias replied, hauling the preacher to his feet. "You don't have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be recorded, studied, and used against people like you. You don't have the right to an attorney. Should one appear, we will be very freaked out and rather annoyed.

"Do you understand these non-rights as I have given them to you?"

Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 110 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Mon 26 Apr 2010
at 10:00
  • msg #168

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Frank sadly shook his head. Elements of working for the company were still taking some getting used to. Things used to be a lot simpler in his previous line of work.

Despite the man's crimes, he couldn't help but feel uncomfortable about the idea of Solomon being thrown into a cell in some secret location until the day he died, without even getting the chance to plead his case. Unfortunately, he didn't make the decisions.

He turned to Glen.

"I guess this about wraps things up, Sheriff," he said. "After the fire gutted his church, the reverend left town. The animal attacks stop, and you can go ahead and have your election free from interference."

He suddenly remembered about Larry, fleeing from the church; not that he could blame the man.

"What do we do about Larry?" he asked both Glen and Toby. "Think he'll talk about tonight's events?"
Facilitator
GM, 191 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Tue 27 Apr 2010
at 01:42
  • msg #169

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Gosh, I don't know, says Glen. I've never met Larry before tonight.

Larry was... weak willed, the subdued preacher offers. He did what I wanted because I put the fear of God into him, but don't count on his silence now that he's gone. He looks up, toward the back of the church.

Well, it looks like that may not be a problem after all.

You turn around and see Adele, as if on cue, leading Larry in through the doors in plastic cuffs. I got him, but... I had a little help. The Retcon Dons are here.

As you look past Adele you can see two black Suburbans parked in front of the church, being leaned on by several men in plain black suits. Two of them are look slightly ruffled. The Retcon Dons, more formally known as "Site Reclamation and Decontamination Specialists", are agents of The Company responsible for ensuring PARC officers have a clean exit strategy. Once you are done with the scene, it is their job to hide any evidence of paranormal activity and make it look like something mundane happened.
Tobias Byrne
player, 110 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Tue 27 Apr 2010
at 01:50
  • msg #170

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"Cool." Tobias said, wondering how they always seemed to arrive just on schedule. "Glen, sir. Thank you for your assistance, and may I say I hope we never have cause to see you again."

Hauling the preacher in front of him, Tobias pushed the preacher towards the suburban. "We should check the premises," he said to Frank, "I want to find out just how he learned to sling those spells of his."
Francis 'Frank' Decourcey
player, 111 posts
Former Fed
Zombie Killer
Tue 27 Apr 2010
at 18:29
  • msg #171

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

"You're a good man, Sheriff McGray," said Frank, shaking the man's hand firmly. "Not a lot of men would have held things together as well as you did, given what you saw tonight. Should be easier to be Sheriff with that lunatic locked away, too. Goodbye, it's been good to have you along for the ride."

He smiled, gave Glen a friendly nod and then turned to walk back towards the church. He intended on searching it thoroughly, as Toby had suggested. He was less curious about the source of the reverend's magic, than the source of his instructions. He had kept saying that everything he had done was God's will. Frank didn't believe God had been speaking to Reverend Solomon, but he did believe someone, or something, had been. He wanted to see if he could find evidence of that.

"Adele," he said. "Let's search this place properly so the Dons can get to work."

He started his search in Solomon's office, but if that proved fruitless he would check the doorway on the other side of the altar, and then start working back through the main room.

OOC: Search Check: 23 (Taking a 20)
I'm making a thorough search of the whole building, looking for anything of interest. First Solomons' office, then the 'cupboard' on the other side of the altar. If neither of those are successful, we might need to think about how long it'll take us to search everything else.

This message was last edited by the player at 18:31, Tue 27 Apr 2010.
Facilitator
GM, 192 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Tue 27 Apr 2010
at 19:50
  • msg #172

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

The Dons take Glen, Larry, and Solomon outside, placing the latter two in the back seats of one of the Suburbans. As one of the agents debriefs Glen and gives him a cover story to tell the rest of the town, the rest get to work on the church. Two of the agents scrub the soot from the walls, floors, pews, and everything else the webs touched while the other touches a long metal rod to the burnt pew Bibles, which instantly restores them to their unburnt condition.

Meanwhile, Frank and Tobias search the rest of the church. The small room to the east is simply a storage closet. In it is nothing more interesting than candles, a ladder, extra light bulbs, and a few other odds and ends.

The room to the west is Solomon's office. Two large tables dominate this room, and bookshelves filled with dark, leather-bound tomes line the walls. Along one wall is a thick chain which is bolted to the wall. The deep scratches and tufts of bluish black fur on the floor tell you that this is where Solomon kept the displacer beast.

While searching the desk, Frank finds a hidden drawer, containing an empty cutout in the shape of Solomon's revolver, several rounds of ammo, and three rolled pieces of parchment. Tobias recognizes the latter as scrolls of animate dead, magic missile, and fireball.

Tobias looks over the bookshelf, which is mostly filled with religious texts but is also peppered with books on the true nature of shadow. Many of these books are bound by hand and appear to be very old. He picks up one that has no label on the spine and opens it to find that it is Solomon's spellbook.

They find no evidence of a higher power directing Solomon's actions, but Frank does find one peculiar email while searching Solomon's decrepit computer. Its subject is "Ezekiel 5:17" and it was sent by reverend_paul@commonpath.org. A rudimentary web search of "commonpath" leads you to an official website for the Fellowship of the Common Path Church. It seems just like any other denominational website.

The content of the email is more suspicious, however. It is as follows:

     Brother,

     You should receive your package tomorrow. I pray you use it to do the Lord's work.

     In God's good name,
     Paul


The date on the email is two days before the first killing.

[Private to Tobias Byrne: Solomon's spellbook:
0-lvl: daze, detect magical aura, message, light, mage hand, prestidigitation, read magic
1-lvl: burning hands, mage armor, magic missile, shield, sleep, true strike
2-lvl: darkvision, invisibility, knock, spiderclimb, web

The scrolls you can use like normal scrolls or you can sacrifice them to automatically choose them as one of the spells you learn the next time you level up. The spell book can not be used as scrolls, but they can also be used as the spells you learn the next time you level up.

In addition, by reading through the appropriate books in Solomon's library, you gain a +2 bonus on your next research check made to learn a new spell.
]
Tobias Byrne
player, 111 posts
There is brilliant,
and then there's me.
Tue 27 Apr 2010
at 19:56
  • msg #173

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Tobias withdraws the offending books from the shelves, stacking them in a neat pile on the reverend's desk with a note saying 'recover' placed on top. The dons would probably get them anyway, but there was no point not making certain.

The scrolls and the spellbook he takes himself, placing them in his field bag. "Remind me to tell the Company I've got these for research." He said to Frank.
Facilitator
GM, 199 posts
Master of the Universe
Creator of Worlds
Wed 28 Apr 2010
at 20:33
  • msg #174

Re: Chapter 1: Signs from God

Tobias finds one more thing when stacking the books. One of tomes appears to be a notebook filled with research on dark magic. Solomon was apparently trying to create a new spell to destroy entire fields, as a way to show God's wrath. All he got so far was a magical ritual that would allow him to eliminate all life in a 30-ft spherical radius. The spell is much more powerful than anything Tobias knows how to perform, and it's very likely that someone was helping Solomon with his research, though this book is only in Solomon's handwriting.




After retrieving your things from the Chicken Ranch and saying your goodbyes, your trip home is uneventful.

Two weeks later you each receive a packet in the mail. In it is a very generous paycheck from the Company along with copies of several news articles.

The first is a printout of a press release from commonpath.org. The release states:

Today we must announce that, due to these hard economic times, we have received word that another of our churches has had to close its doors. The Fellowship of the Common Path Church in Ford, Montana, which was pastored by Brother Solomon Burke, has given its last sermon as of June 6th. We ask that all of our members pray for their congregation, that God will guide them to another house of worship. Brother Solomon has announced that he will travel to South America to do mission work, so let us keep him in our prayers also...

The second is an article from the Billings Gazette, titled "Small Town Mayoral Election Has Unexpected Outcome: Big Cat Attacks Determine Winner":

The tiny town of Ford, Montana, which has been afflicted with the death of several of its prominent citizens, was rocked again this week when Sheriff Glen McGray was elected as the town's mayor.

Why is this outcome so shocking? McGray was not on the ballot.

McGray is the man responsible for finding and killing the wild cat that attacked and killed Ford's Mayor Jed Owen, which prompted the emergency election in the first place. The cat then went on to kill Earl Lindscomb, one of the mayoral candidates, and farmhand Bill Elgin.

McGray, who some in the town at first thought was incompetent, managed to find the cat by following its tracks from the the most recent crime scene through the woods and to the creatures lair. While calling for backup he was attacked by the animal, which destroyed McGray's radio, and McGray was forced to shoot the cat.

The town was so taken by McGray's actions that he won the Mayoral election on write-in votes, taking 74% of the vote. Another 11% of the vote went to Solomon Burke, a local preacher whose church closed the week before the election. The deceased Earl Lindscomb got 9% of the vote, and Trent Barton, a local banker, came in last place with 6%.

The town council is currently studying the by-laws of the town charter to see if write-in votes are even allowed, and if the position of Mayor can be held by the Sheriff. They are expected to make a report next week.


Lastly is an editorial from the Ford Prospect, written by Jim Hickman, who you recognize by the picture as one of the locals you spoke to in the tavern.

I don't know about you, Fordians, but I smell a coverup. First the mayor dies, then the corporate shill dies, then the pastor disappears. Next thing you know, the Sheriff just HAPPENS to find some bobcat in the woods and we are supposed to believe that that little thing was what was killing everybody. How was one little sheriff able to find this cat when all those posses couldn't? And who were those inspectors that came? Are we supposed to believe it's just a COINCIDENCE that the day they show up in town is the same day the sheriff takes his first step into taking over the town? And what about the reports of disturbed graves in the cemetery? I ain't inclined to believe that a place like that has a mole problem, like they's trying to tell us. I'm telling you, my friends and neighbors, something is going on here. Luckily you have me, your humble reporter, to get to the truth!

Like I say every week, Fordians, keep your eyes and ears open. Because just because you ain't paranoid, don't mean they AREN'T watching you. Come back next week to read how the big cow companies are controlling your mind by putting chemicals into the runoff water.

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