Re: Is this mic on...?
*chuckles* well, funny might be stretching it a bit much.
I work at a minimum security prison. It doesn't have guard towers or stone walls, just high chain link fences and a patrol vehicle that circles the perimeter.
On occasion, I drive that patrol vehicle. It's not a bad way to spend the shift, with me and another person switching out every few hours.
We have 12 hours shifts so by the end of the shift we can get a little tired, though I usually drink enough soda to avoid that.
Last May, I was in the patrol vehicle, a small Dodge Dakota pick up truck, during a night of torrential rain storms. The vehicle had been giving us trouble, but that was too be expected, since it's a state vehicle and they tend to make us drive them until they're literally falling apart before getting another one for us.
This one, a 1996 model, was running reasonably well, except for a transmission problem where if you put it in park, sometimes it wouldn't take. The truck would think it was in Reverse, and start moving backwards, so you had to really slam it into Park, and wait a second to see if it "stuck there".
We'd complained to the supervisors, who promised to look into it when they had the time.
Meanwhile, most of us were being careful to make sure the vehicle had settled into park correctly before we got out, so it wouldn't roll off into a ditch if we got out to get something out of the cooler in the back.
On that stormy night I mentioned, I drove around the perimeter in the rain, and was on the last half hour of my shift. I was tired and a little punchy, but anxious to get done with my shift and get home to sleep.
I drive around on a dirt road that circles 75% of the prison perimeter, with 25% flanked by the parking lot. I'd driven through the lot and was entering the dirt road that went off it when I saw something dark in the road. It was small, so I thought at first it was a branch or something, and even though I was going slow I didn't see it until I was already driving over it. I passed it without incident, and decided to see what it was.
I put the vehicle in park, and waited to see if it stuck in park. It did. So I exited and went to the back of the vehicle. I saw that the "debris" was a large turtle, about a foot and a half across. Not wanting to hit it on the way back around on my next pass, I bent over to pick it up.
That's when the vehicle slipped on its own out of Park into Reverse and started rolling back quickly. I was caught off guard and knocked down, landing on my back. The rear tire caught me and didn't go over me, but since the vehicle was front wheel drive the truck kept going, pushing me along the gravel road for about 30 feet until we reached the parking lot, where it pushed me along another 30 feet and finally stopped, the friction of pushing me finally slowing it down. It happened so fast I couldn't even think about trying to grab anything.
About here is when the tire managed to get on top of my chest and stomach area, and I realized I couldn't breath. I was trapped and suffocating.
I had a thought: "If I believed in god, this is where I would probably pray"
Then, as an atheist, I had another thought. "Nah. Fuck that".
And I closed my eyes, to let whatever happened happen.
I passed out at that point.
Unbeknownst to me, there were people from the next shift coming in (since, as I'd mentioned, it was near the end of my shift) and since I was in the parking lot a few of them saw me, and raised the alarm.
Help arrived, with some large men lifting the truck bodily and pulling me out from under it.
Apparently I was blue, but started breathing very soon after being freed.
I was a bit disoriented, but I remember feeling embarrassed and wanting to stand up, but they didn't let me. I had a gun on me (standard issue for patrol guards) and mentioned that I didn't know where it was, but another officer told me that they'd taken it from my holster while I was regaining consciousness.
An ambulance was called, and I left soon after to the ER.
Luckily, other than a good cut on my scalp and road rash over most of my body, I was more or less unharmed. There was some internal squishing, and my back is still a bit messed up, but there was no broken bones or spinal damage at least.
