"And you know what else is gay?" Eddy asked, a splutter of laughter coming from him as he tried to keep back the giggles, enjoying the discussion.

"What's gay?" Eddy's giggling was getting to Shawn; he was having fun too?

"Teachers are gay" Eddy announced, laughing. "No, not just gay. Super-gay!" He said with greater volume, still controlled but louder, with a hint of mischief to his voice, like saying something like that wasn't allowed and so therefore was more fun. Then, he started to laugh really hard, leaning on Shawn a little with one hand, the physical contact a hopeful sign of shared laughter.

Shawn giggled along with him, and leaning right back against him, in a somewhat unstable equilibrium. There was a sense of taboo, which made things that much funnier.

"What else is gay!?" Eddy laughed, trying to encourage Shawn to play along.

Shawn thought for a second. "Umm...math! Math is gay!"

"Hahah!" Eddy agreed. "Math is gay!"

"Hey, where are you from?" Eddy asked suddenly. The question transported Shawn back from laughter to reality. Sure, this was a 'special school' so everyone was from somewhere.

Shawn's laughter trailed off as Eddy started asking questions. "I'm from Milwaukee. Before LA, I mean. How about you?"

"I'm from New Jersey." Eddy said, laughter leaving what appeared to be a permanent smile on his face. A warm smile, with deep creases in the sides that gave the impression that Eddy was used to smiling. It was enough to make Shawn almost forget the assault he had suffered at Eric's hands a few moments ago.

"Milll-waw-keee." Eddy sounded out the words, sloshing them around in his mouth and then spitting them out, trying them on.

"I bet you don't know the difference between girls from New Jersey and trash?" Eddy asked, smile growing even bigger. "Go ahead and guess. What's the difference between a New Jersey girl and trash?"

Shawn cocked his head to the side, unsure. "I dunno. What's the difference?"

"Trash gets taken out!" Eddy proclaimed boldly puffing his chest out. Then he let all of the air he was using to puff out that chest escape with a loud laugh.

Shawn didn't really get why that one was funny, but he matched Eddy's laughter anyways.

Having laughed together, Eddy wiped his eyes with one finger. "I like things like baseball, jokes and football. What are you into?"

It seemed like a natural evolution into to talk about more fun things that the two boys had in common now that they had shared a laugh. Shawn could hear the kickball crowd in the distance cheering, probably because someone was rounding the bases.

"I love baseball and jokes!" Shawn did like jokes, but while he was pretty good at baseball, it wasn't really his favourite thing; he just wanted Eddy to like him. "Don't really like kickball, though."

"Alright!" Eddy said, loving the idea that Shawn said he like the same things that he liked. "Because Kickball is gay!" Eddy said, laughing again.

"Hey, want to know what I'm about to do? You seem like a cool kid, so you'll probably like doing it too." he suggested, leaning into Shawn's personal space with a conspiratorial look. It was clear Eddy was about to share some kind of secret.

Shawn leaned in close to hear it. "What are you gonna do?"

Eddy looked both ways to make sure no one was looking. Then he leaned in even closer to Shawn: close enough for Shawn to almost feel Eddy's breathe against his face.

"I'm going to Smoke...a...cigarette..." Eddy pointedly spoke the last three words. Each syllable landing on Shawn's ear with a heavy mark. Eddy pulled back his face with a serious look. An expectant look. It was clear he was trying to judge Shawn's reaction. Keening to know how far Shawn might go down the path with him. It was also a knowing look that he gave Shawn. A look that said

'that's right. I'm going to do something that only older kids get caught doing. And that parents don't want us to do.'

He stood there in silent judgement, waiting for Shawn's response. Shawn got the very reals sense that Shawn's next words could make or break the laughter between himself and Eddy that afternoon.

Shawn was shocked at Eddy's suggestion, but he tried to think about how he should respond. He wanted Eddy to be his friend, or at the very least to not think he was uncool. But he didn't want to smoke a cigarette, or worse, get caught smoking a cigarette. "Oh, wow! You could get in big trouble, though." With his tone and expression, Shawn tried to convey that he thought Eddy was a cool guy, but was too scared to try smoking himself. That way, Eddy could feel like the brave one.

"Yeah." Eddy said, seeming to revel in the idea. But it became clear that the way the conversation was playing out, it wasn't going to pass by with a middle ground the way Shawn had avoided many conversations like it in the past.

"It's bad." Eddy agreed, hyping himself up with the idea, warming to Shawn's comment about trouble. Eddy began to talk to Shawn about the kinds of trouble smoking could lead to: suspension if a kid got caught, a beating from a parent if smoke was smelled on his clothes, tattle-tails on the playground if another kid disapproved. Eddy even mentioned the possibility of coughing painfully if you took a drag like Eddy had seen another kid do.

With each possible bad outcome that Eddy listed, Shawn felt the noose of the conversation tightening around his neck, trapping him to the inevitable choice that Eddy was forcing upon him.

Then it came. The question. Eddy asked it direct. More direct then he had ever spoke in the conversation  up to that point.

"You gonna do it with me or what?" Eddy asked in a friendly, expectant tone. He folded his arms, head cocking to one side, eyes blinking, face taking a neutral tone. It wasn't unfriendly, but rather, curious.

The noose was tightening, but Shawn still tried to struggle free. "I'll keep lookout, okay?" He tried to make it sound flattering; the more scared he seemed, the braver Eddy must be, right?
This message was last edited by the player at 17:54, Thu 16 Mar 2017.

It looked like Eddy was going to bite for a moment. He unfolded his arms, taking in what Shawn had said, giving Shawn a sense that maybe, indeed Eddy was satisfied with looking brave, being the lone bad-boy between the two of them.

But that would have been a different day. And maybe with a different kid. Maybe with a kid that Shawn would have tried to work-on maybe at a studio or in the hallways at school.

"Look out?" Eddy asked, seemingly disappointed. It was only a half a second after Shawn himself had spoken.

"Shawn you're not...." Eddy said, looking at Shawn with surprise--shock even. As if Eddy himself couldn't believe what he was about to accuse Shawn of. "You're not chickening out? Are you?" Eddy's voice suggested that he couldn't possibly fathom Shawn chickening out on smoking the cigarette, couldn't possibly want to believe that Shawn might let him do it alone, not after sharing a good laugh together and bonding over the use of the word 'gay.'

Shawn tried to salvage the situation with excuses. "My Mom would know - she checks. I'm sorry Eddy, but I'd be grounded forever."

Deep creases lined Eddy's forehead, his face suddenly looking hard and angular. His jaw was fixed, eyes staring at Shawn with look that Shawn soon recognized as anger. But there was something else in that look. Could it be hurt?

"Dickhead." Eddy said to Shawn, abruptly cutting off the silence, the words sounding like a slap in the face. Shawn wasn't used to hearing kids say that kind of word.

"You're a dickhead." Eddy said again, his lip curled up into a sneer. Then he turned his back to Shawn and started running away.

Shawn didn't try to run after or respond. Eddy was right. He was a dickhead for doing that to Eddy. He was awful and felt awful for being awful. He just stood there, stewing on that fact.

And that was it. Shawn just sat there until the hall monitor sounded the whistle, putting an end to the strange recess which saw him experience lows then a high and then a low again.

OOC: Shawn Joins Thread

Shawn: Horrifying Nightmares