Re: Hadrian Hashed Up
You read page after page of mostly emoting. Shock, horror and rage leap off the pages, but expressed in the most stupid and banal way possible. There is very little actual information.
One person, River Cooss, jumps off the page because his response is so different.
"I walked into the locker room to change my clothes in preparation for the horrendous ritual of P.E., which should be banned, btw, and I saw that the ground was slick with water even though I knew no one should have been in the locker room during the previous lunch hour. Instantly, I was paranoid as I'd heard about the Locker Room murderer killing three people, and so I grabbed a baseball bat from the rack by the door and advanced.
Q. Were you angry?
A. More fascinated, but frightened. I saw Albert Ravens, class president of the eleventh grade, laying on the floor in his letterman jacket, black jeans, white shoes, and no socks. He was not moving, so I checked the rest of the bathroom for his assailant.
Q. Why not check the body?
A. I was hoping to get a chance to whack the guy who did it. Besides, he was not breathing. I checked him then, and I think I know what happened. He was wet on the front, but not on the sides. He had a knife in his back. I think the killer snuck up behind him, and put a knife in his back and forced him to get in the shower. Probably intended to strangle him, but Albert was an arrogant jerk and he tried to fight, and so he fell, and the killer let him land on the knife, and figured it was done.
Q. Interesting theory. Who's the policeman here anyways? You may go and keep your mouth shut about your theory.
This compares to a more typical response like...
"There I was, it was so horrible. I was in the locker room for, well, anyways, and the poor Drew Smithers was face down in the toilet. So undignified. I hope we catch that evil killer. No, I'm not sure it was the middle stall...did I hear noises, um no. I was screaming too loudly in my head. Please say you're going tos top this madman."
Mindy saw her boyfriend last, and George saw his girlfriend, Carla Blake last. Both are tales of woe and self-pity.