Dreams of thundering race cars, of UV lights, and exploding starships chase you into consciousness.

"Oh, aye, definitely we should. Puir thing, so deformed."

You feel squished, and stretched, and open your eyes to see you way too large shoes fall off your feet.

And something rustles in the woodland bushes.

You're buried in your own clothes.

Disoriented, I take this in, and gulp mentally, though mingled with curiosity.

:: Dearest LORD, please guide and guard me now, I pray... ::

I attempt to stretch out my telepathic senses to sense my surroundings.

:: Ring...  Are you online?  Please acknowledge. ::

Then I attempt to stretch out my clairvoyant senses to sense my surroundings, to see what made the noise nearby... and to see what the form inside my clothes looks like...

You feel a minor protective ward take shape around you.

::Online::

You are in a wood of young oak trees about twenty feet tall with two foot tall bushes dotted with berries of varied colors.

Your form is one foot tall, very chubby, and it has ears that are eight inches long....kinda elvish in the anime way.  Whatever made the noise is gone.

:: Ring, and CU2.  Are there electronic communications within detectable range? If so, begin recording now. Monitor, and summarize when ready. Analyze current surroundings. ::

:: Identify my current form, referencing any available data on fantasy and folklore for mythical Celtic races.  Identify accent origin of the individual who spoke before my form was changed. ::

I check for vectors, both for versers and for belongings.

:: Dearest LORD, please open my eyes, that I may clearly discern and perceive, I pray...  ::

I look around the immediate area, using my Sight.

I expand my telepathic search outwards to see if I can touch the minds of any nearby sentients.

I also expand my clairvoyant search, and then zoom out to see what the nearby region looks like, and zoom out further to see what the land masses look like, and what the globe looks like (if I'm even on a globe here), and discern what directions any vectors may lie relative to these macroscopic views.

If possible, I attempt to use my Sight with the clairvoyant search...

::No electronic communications in range.::

Words in pale purple with a float 'Stop' sign appear before you.  'One supernormal informational action per ten minutes. The Admin.'.

The rest of your abilities don't even have a tickle of getting started.

Below this floating words is "OK" and "Cancel" similarly floating.  The wind has stopped blowing. You no longer hear noise of a forrest.

: Interesting.  Am I in a video game of some type? :

I attempt to touch the "OK".  If that doesn't work, I say "OK" aloud.

:: Ring.  Inform me when ten minutes have passed from now. ::

:: Designate current form "Big Ears".  Record current form in slot over form designated "Palpatine". ::

:: After form "Big Ears" is successfully recorded, initiate change to form "Kyle the Ariatte". ::

After I have changed form...

:: Ring.  I am now testing this form's flight capabilities.  If I am in danger of uncontrolled descent, initiate your own flight capability to keep us safe. ::

And with that, I experimentally take wing.

If I am successful, I follow the vector toward my belongings.  If that is considered "supernormal information", then I wait until the ten minutes elapse before proceeding.

As I go, I observe the landscape near and far, getting overall impressions, keeping a particular eye open for any other sentients that may be around...

The Ring does not reply to you, but it does shift your shape to the Ariatte.

You fly up in the air, and soar past a small waterfall and stream.  Tiny lights flicker down in the trees over the stream.

The vector does not work, so you circle about for a bit...and you see the lights are rising up and down in a continous cycle.

The Ring says :Ten minutes have elapsed:

And you get no further information about the vector or from the Ring.

But you do see large clouds a few thousand feet up, and giants walking about on top of them.  The small bright lights are going up to the lowest of these clouds.

After the Ring tells me the ten minute limit has expired...

:: Dearest LORD, please open my eyes, that I may clearly discern and perceive, I pray... ::

And I look at the small bright lights, and the giants, and the rest of what is visible to me, through my Sight.

:: Ring. Inform me when ten minutes have passed from now. ::

OOC: BTW, does it seem to be morning, afternoon, night?  Fluffy white clouds or dark gray clouds?  What is the temperature and weather and etc? :)

You get no answer from your prayer, and ten minutes later the Ring tells you ten minutes have passed.

It seems to be indeterminate time of day.  Fluffy white clouds going up to cirrus clouds...those high clouds seem menacing.  Temperature is uncertain, but pleasant.  There is no current rain.  It looks like late spring down below.

You're not used to flying so I'd say you're starting to sweat a bit.

"Admin, please list current action restrictions."

I glide down toward the small waterfall and stream.  If possible, I use telepathy on the way there...

"Supernormal information for next 7:52 seconds. Asked 'Ring' for time."

"Second limit: Lack of spectators leading to cessation of active account or other action.  Currently 7. Null effect currently."

You spiral down to the two inch long bipedals with the glowing winds and bodies.  They are lifting baseball sized buckets of water from the stream and carrying them upward into the sky, about every ten seconds.

Are you 'sending' or 'reading' with telepathy?

After I hear Admin's explanation, I manually count down mentally instead of having Ring do it.

I then decide to use my Sight instead of telepathy, looking around at the scene before me — the two inch folks, the giants, and whatever else I can see...

In your Sight...

Above the two inch folk you see a sign that says 'go away', and another one that says ' hard at work', and a third not aura sight, but like a computer tag...

"Level One Water Ferry: Status: At work. Name: Roger."

The giants all have thunderbolts in their auras, and "Level 3 Air Giant: Status: Rest. Name:  Shimz'ag;kak'glg'l.azka;kjaljm;l;'."

You see a furred animal hangliding over your way.  It seems to be looking for something down in the trees. You can't read its aura.

I look at myself through my Sight as well, and then continue to observe the approaching furred animal...

Clever idea, but your Sight has stopped working.  Eventually, the hanglider drops out of the sky near you, and a three foot tall, furred creature gets out of it.

"I....am a Badger. Hence....I....have a badge.  Many badges in fact.  Do you have a badge that allows you to go snooping on others, Mister Snoopy Snippety-Snooperperson?  I...thought not."

Whenever he says "I", he grooms himself a little bit, making sure his sleek fur or whiskers are placed just so.

He then snaps his finges and out comes a bunch of Big Ears.  They start putting the hangliderup.

"Its what the Little People are for after all. Taking care of the VIps."

As soon as I realize that my Sight has stopped working, I start counting mentally, and continue doing so as I watch the hang glider approaches.  As soon as I get to ten minutes, I look at myself and at the newcomers via Sight...

I look at the badger as he grooms himself, looking suitably impressed.

"Wherever did you get such a lovely badge?"

I examine it, and then look at him expectantly.

"You must be just the right one to help me.  With all those badges and everything, you must know a great many things.  Please, where are we?  I seem to have lost my way..."

"I got it from the Sheriff of the Badgers, who got his from the Chief Badger. And you..."

He shows you a badge and your Sight goes away.

"Have no badge to be a Snippety-Snooperperson.  But, you being a being of good taste, I won't arrest you....this time.  We are in the Tribal Lands of the  Talking Animals, ruled by the Chief Badger in the Changing World."

"Ah, but I am not snooping, your Badger-ness, but rather seeking wisdom."

"For I... am a Bird of Pray.  And my mandate to pray at all times, and particularly in times when I need extra wisdom, is given by neither Sheriff nor Chief, but by the LORD God Almighty Himself."

"I am a sojourner from a very far land, just arrived.  Could you please tell me of these lands and of their peoples, that I may know how best to be a blessing to all I may encounter?"

OOC: Tell me when my Sight kicks in, and what I see... :)

"Sorry, but you'll have to go to the Chief Badger's cave, and get his permission, and a shiny badge, like mine, but different, or get exiled to an Unformed Land.  We don't know this Almighty person, but we do know the High King, and the Mods, and the Admin."

And while you're in range of Deputy Badger's dispel magic badge, you're not seeing with Sight.

"Please, your Badger-ness, where may I find this Chief Badger's cave?  And would you be so kind as to put in a good word for me?  I'm certain that if one as well respected and very important as you were to do so, I would find favor in his sight..."

"Its at the root of High Hill, from which flows this stream."  And he gives you a fishy look like he just realized you're being awfully polite.  "The Chief Badger will have to judge you for himself to see if you're worthy to do magic in his realm, and what types of the seventeen types of magic he will allow you."

"Thank you, sir, and good day to you."

I depart, taking frequent glances at myself to see if my Sight kicks in after leaving the Deputy's sphere of influence.  If/when it does, I look back to look back at him, and at his big ear helpers.

If my Sight doesn't kick in, then I say "Admin, please show stats."  After that, I look at myself, and at him and his helpers.  If that doesn't work, then I try to invoke my Sight again, and look accordingly.

And I make my way upstream toward the root of High Hill, observing well as I go.  As I do so...

"Admin, please access help tutorial..."

Once you get twenty yards away, your Sight is re-enabled.

–stack of paperwork, scales of justice, big shiny badge–
–mirror, banana peel, bagpipe–

"Tutorial acessed.

Tutorial program will be adding later. Check back soon! New content is being added daily as we prepare for the New Creation Launch!"

OOC: What does my Sight reveal when I look at myself?

Since my Sight doesn't seem to be revealing any specific names and/or stats this time...

"Admin.  Please show stats."

Then I look at myself, and the badger, and the big ears, and the water ferries, and the air giants, and whatever else is within view...

"Admin.  Please access 'About program New Creation', and 'version information and change log'."

: Hmmm...  a MMORPG, perhaps.  And no vectors?... :

I examine myself to see what items, if any, I am carrying.

And I continue making my way upstream.

You get an array of stats from 1-4 level, and names.

For yourself....

"Master Oak. Level One Outsider, sub-class 'Verser'."

"About....Admin aided by the Mods is preparing the first new Creation of a Universe in a Cycle. Curious deities, angelic entities, ghosts, and others are encouraged to watch from the Spectator Room.  This fantastic project will be of interest from High Heaven to Hades and everywhere between."

"This is V 2.09. Change log is available only to deity level individuals."

You are not carrying anything but your clothes.

Upstream, you happen upon a path that wanders by the edge of the gradually steepening banks.  And then you come to a thick wall of thorns, and the path goes down steeply to the water, and across stones across the brisk stream. Upon the eight rocks is the word 'it' on each rock.

OOC: I assume that my clothing includes what I had in my pockets?

I take wing, and view the scene (including both sides of the thorn wall and both sides of the brisk stream) from above...

You soar into the air, and looking across the stream you see a winding path that leads by a Sphyinx, and then to a ladder next to a fifty foot waterfall, and then broad plains with a river running through them.

Looking over the thorns you see the Blue Screen of Doom.  It gigantic, a blue block of cobalt blue light that spans at least a hundred acres.

Whoosh.

Something hits you hard in the arm from below. You're spinning out of the air.  Your right arm is snapped.

OOC: Uh, no.

:: Ring.  Initiate flight capability. Move away from whatever is attacking us ::

I look to see where the source of the attack is via Sight.

"Admin.  Please show stats."

::Moving in random direction.::

You don't see anything by Sight, but by normal sight, you see one of the stepping stones in the creek launch itself skyward, and slam into your chest.

"50% Health." Admin says.

You see another stone in the creek trembling.

:: Ring.  Descend to where I just started flying from, next to that brisk stream and wall of thorns.  If another of those stones from the stream is launched toward me, initiate evasive maneuvers, and fly away toward the Sphinx as quickly as possible . ::

I put my protective ward back up...

:: Dearest LORD, please guide and guard me now, I pray... ::

Once I land safely, I change form to Kzinti, and then back to Ariatte, in order to heal my injuries...

One of the rock-its flies over your head, but you're down before you're in the targetting range for too long.  A change, and another change, and you're back in good health.

:: Thank you, dearest LORD... ::

I ponder my position.  The obstacles on this path may be useful to earn whatever "experience points" are needed to "gain levels" in this "game".  However, I seem to recall that Sphinx encounters can be perilous, and fifty foot ladders aren't my favorite activity either.  And it may well be advisable to see this Chief Badger as soon as possible, so that I can either be approved or disapproved promptly.  And if the latter, there are always Unformed Lands to perhaps have a hand in forming...

:: Ring.  Initiate flight capability.  Follow the path of the river upstream.  Initiate evasive maneuvers if attacked. ::

I observe as I proceed, for there might be interesting creatures along the way to make friends with.  And as I proceed, I query...

"Admin, please list the seventeen types of magic available in the Tribal Lands of the Talking Animals..."

You fly on up past the second waterfall, and over a farmland with ten acre square fields, and hard working demihumans below in their small collections of thatched huts gathered into villages.

A single tall, steep-sided hill grows closer as you go over the plains.  And you realize others are flying to and from the High Hill.  Badgers in hang gliders, and lizardish sorts on dragons, and something that looks like a cloud, but has eyes....

"Information unavailable."

And you arrive at the hundred foot wide mouth of a cave, with a wide marble staircase leading down into the cool airs gushing out.  Inside, you see balls of light drifting about providing illumination.

Ten badger guards wait in a line across the entrance.  From seeing the others who walk, you can see that the procedure is to walk up to one, make a statement, give a coin, and enter.

: Hmmmm.  Empty pockets, and coins required.  Sigh... :

"Admin, please list employment opportunities in the Tribal Lands of the Talking Animals."

"Information unavailable."

: Sigh. :

I use my Sight to look at the others as they approach, and identify the one that seems the (at least potentially) friendliest.

"Excuse me, but I am new to these lands.  How can we get coins?"

"Like everyone else does, go into a dungeon." From further conversation you find that while there a few jobs that will earn you coin, most of them require coin or credentials.  Or you could become a farmhand for the Bears in their farms.  Get a coin at the end of summer.

"Or you could join Robin and his merry flock of hoodlums."

Second...

"Are you sure you don't have any money in your inventory?"

OOC: BTW, who am I talking to?  Description?  Sight?

I consider thoughtfully.

"Well, I did check my pockets, but... well, thank you for your help."

I move off a bit for some privacy, and then...

"Admin, please show inventory..."

A kangaroo-man. In Sight, he's got a shovel.

You're suddenly in a large square black room with the walls glowing fainting.  Laying on the floor are all the items you versed in with.

I check for vectors...

Then I check to see if the items include only what I was carrying, or the stuff that the pawn shop owner had as well.

I also check to see if there are any additional items that may have been added (coins similar to what I saw being handed to the badger guards, badges, etc.).

:: Ring.  Are you able to interface with any computer system here? ::

The vectors lead to the items here.

What is here is only what you had, except for a Cheap Wooden Sword and a Tattered Leather Vest Armor which have been added.

:No:

I take and pocket my Kinetic Field device and my Empathic Field device.

"Admin, please show coins."

I see if I have any indication of coins or not...

"Admin, please return to game."

As I reappear, I look carefully at my surroundings to determine whether it appears that time passed in the rest of the game world while I was looking at my inventory, or whether time stopped as it seemed to do when I first encountered that dialog box.

"Admin, please show map."

If a map is available, I look for indications of known settlements, known dungeons, etc...

I also look to see if the kangaroo-man is still around anywhere nearby...

If you had coins before you entered this universe, you have them now.  If not, then not.

Time has passed, but it looks to be about one for one.

A map appears in front of you.  It shows you what you've already discovered.

The kangaroo-man has entered past the guards and is hopping down into the cave mouth.

Upon getting back, you have one device in your pocket, and the other in your hand.  Trying to put the second device in your pocket is impossible.

More beings stream by you.  One, orchish looking fellow, seems to be natural looking from oneside, but paper thin on another side.

"Admin, please show stats."

I unobtrusively observe the various beings streaming by, and their stats, and by Sight.

I try to discern whether or not paper thinness seems to correspond to NPCs that aren't fleshed out in any depth.

I check out what type(s) of coins are being used by the various arrivals ("gold pieces"?  "copper pieces"? etc.?).

I keep an eye open for what types of beings there are, and for friendly looking types...

OOC: With all that Oak has been through, your guess is as good as mine if he currently has any coins.  How about a GE roll?

Some are that way, and some seem normal, but paper thin.

Copper pieces.

Most seem to be animals of various sorts, but larger than the ones from Earth.  Most seem friendly enough.

You have a dozen small coins.

After finding my coins, I take a penny in hand, and queue up.

I listen to the statements of those in front of me.

If reasonably compatible, when it is my turn I state:

"I am newly arrived in these lands, and I was told by a Deputy Badger that I need to see the Chief Badger for permission to do magic in his realm."

Assuming I am approved to enter, I give my coin at the appropriate time, and do so...

Your clothes change to a pale blue robe that is about two feet too long. No one else seems to bat an eye at the transformation.

In Sight, you're now listed with 'Class:Magician. Level 0′ in addition.

You soon find that the Badgers are bueraucrats.  Well, you knew that already.  What you didn't know was to what insane level they could take it.

93 forms!?!

You've gotten eight done by day's end.

When I enter and am queried, I ask about what kinds of "magic" are available, and what kinds of "Classes", particularly asking if there is a "Cleric" type of class, as well as a "Psi" type of class.

And based upon what is available, I will make my petition accordingly.

I would

much
prefer to be classified as one who draws upon Divine power, and/or who draws upon Psi power, and/or who draws on Tech power, rather than an arcane magician...

There is a Cleric class. You can be a Prophet who does big miracles and warns of the future. You can be a Healer who heals others (not self).  You can be an Exercist who helps people drive out evil fat. You can be a Cleric in the D&D style. You can be a Priest and preach and sacrifice.  You can be a Summoner and call help in the form of Outsiders. You can be a guru, and preach, do physical magic like healing self, and raise your stats.

In the Psi Class, you can be a Talent who has a broad ability like Telekinesis up to a moderate level. Or you can be Gifted, and have one small ability at a high level. Seer is for precognition, and clairvoyance.  Sear is for pyrokinetic powers of all sorts.  Earthmover is for high level Earth TK.  Truthcatcher is for Read Surface Thoughts.  Mentat is for multiple psi abilities, but not precog or pyro, or earthmoving or read surface thoughts.

In Tech you can be a Smith which is a metalworker, or a Mad Scientist who can do crazy things that infrequently don't work, or Technomancer who does tech that is magic, or Crafter as in Craftsperson (the most common ordinary sort like leatherworker, or potter, or barrelmaker.)

Yes.

Portals to one type of location is a Gift. More is a Talent.  Shapechanging to one form is a Gift. To multiple forms is a Talent.

Frequently work.

Crazy things. Think bad B movies. 'we're going to add cyborg arms to this rat' or 'with this radiation pill, the cat will turn into a supercat' or 'it's alive!' or 'with this computer program, some pictures in a magazine, and a lightning bolt....we'll create the perfect woman...Weird Science.'

Yes, and yes. Just more paperwork seems to be the answer. (Heh, heh).

Permission.

They can't tell you this here. You could go to the Mad Scientist Drextan, a half kobold, half dwarf, half snotling for answers.

As above.

Second....

In the interest of character...

You're sitting in a small room with a low roof of five feet, which is as most roofs here, and the Badger 3rd Class Answerer of Imponderables Jovak is tryiing to answer your questions. He leaves.  You're with two others, a Talking Animal Fair-ret who is very courteous and always concerned with not crowding you too closely or bothering you with his musky smell, and a Tiny Giant with a problem with his mimmoths, miniature wooly mammoths, of which he has several with him.

And then the door opens, and fourteen rats, not talking, but with glowing red eyes, are dumped from a bag into the room by Dirty Dwarf with 'dirty deeds done dirt cheap' on his t-shirt.  These rats make you sick just to look at them as they are foul and unnatural.  Unhappily, they also like fowl...of which you are one right now.

:: Ring.  Use a low-level Fear Empathic Field on the rats to keep them from approaching me.  Increase strength the closer they come.  Raise shields if they continue approaching. ::

I instruct Ring and CU2 on how to fill in the forms, and use CU2′s scanner and printer
(see messages #154-#155 of
<a href="http://rpol.net/display.cgi?gi=9041&gn=Worldwalker&show=all&ti=119" rel="nofollow">this RPOL thread
</a>) to fill them all in. :)

I apply for whatever classes are needed to grant permission to use all of my abilities — all the non-arcane classes such as the Cleric & Psi & Tech (& Bod?) classes, with whatever repeats (Gifts & Talents) that are needed, to authorize me to do all the stuff I am able to do.

The rats approach, and then start to be agitated, and then in a tide of nastiness flee the room.

You fill out the papers you can here. Which means they have to be taiken elsewhere, and things done there, and so on....and then other papers given you...

Jovind comes back.  He seems displeased that you are all in his office.  He fiddles around his desk a bit, looks for a half-second at your papers...and then gets up, grabbing his coat from a hook on the wall...

OOC: Any reactions from the other folks that are waiting with me?

"Thank you very much for your help, sir.  Is there anything else I need to do, or is all in order?"

The Fair-ret draws two sabers and braces himself for the attack.  The Tiny giant and the mimmoths stampeded into the corner.

"Um...well...its like this...um....in this case...." He's moving toward the door. "Let me clarify what I have said.....mmmm....how to put my previous point..."  He's opening the door, and the Fair-ret to your right is sputtering in rage.

As he makes his way toward the door, I move with him...

:: Ring.  Use continuous TK repulsion field against the door to keep anyone from being able to open it. ::

I look interestedly and expectantly at him.

"Yes, sir?"

".....In the simplistic examination of preceding events one might assume that you were done, but I am an expert in obfuscation, I mead expeditiously advancing the work of this office which is ....I feel we have gotten off on a wrong foot..." He yanks at the door. He tries again. "What's wrong with this door.  Where was I? I'm sorry....but I need to go and find the janitor...." He yanks at the door again,a nd then panting turns to face you.  "I....I don't see how I can work on this further today. i've made my position on your papers perfectly clear, and I wish you would stop harrassing me."

He's nerved up, and blithering.  The Fair-ret is grinding his teeth in rage, and muttering...

"Shall I call him out in a duel of honor? Or would it be dishonorable to kill such a lackwit?"

The Tiny Giant is patting his trumpeting mimmoths, and popping his neck.

"Now see here, my good badger. I pay good tax money. I expect service."

"Ah, one might assume that we are done?  Excellent, and your position is indeed perfectly clear, sir.  Thank you very much for your help!"

I give him a grateful smile.

"In that case, if you could just give us our badges now, then we could all help you open this sticky door.  I'm certain that once we all have received our badges, our combined strength should be sufficient to get it open."

He stares with baffled fury at you, and then stomps over to his desk, yanks out the various badges, and throws them at each of you.  It stings.

"Now that I am totally behind in the Customer Unservice Race. What about my bonus?  How am I to get my clerks if I don't have a long line of people out the door to prove I need more help?"

I check to see if all of the badges are in order.  If so...

:: Ring.  End TK repulsion field on the door.  ::

In response to his lamentation, I look at him sympathetically.

"Perhaps I could help, if I understood the problem better.  What is the Customer Unservice Race?"

He looks at you narrowly for a second, but he's not that discreet.

"We've had a Optimal Practises Study Group, and it revealed that bueraucrats maximize their power when they block action on a large scale.  So, one of OPSG offered an award for any worker who was spectacularly, totally unhelpful."

I listen sadly to his explanation, glancing at my companions, and back to him.

"The best way I can see to help is to encourage you to either leave this place, or work within to help them change their ways.  Do you really want to spend your life trying to hinder people rather than help them, and to be a part of an organization that does so?"

I move over to the door, and open it without effort, before pushing it closed again.

"Our time has come to leave.  Do you wish to come, friend Jovind?"

After his response, I look at the others.

"Are you ready to depart, friends?"

The Tiny Giant and the Fair-ret leave with you.

"Very sad. The Badger bueraucracy being taken over by power madness. Unfair." The Fair-ret says as it runs and bounces about on its way out.

"We pay good silver for service, and these idiots..." The Tiny Giant grinds his teeth together in rage.  Behind him, his small herd of woolly mimmoths trumpets their outrage through their trunks.

You follow the passages up to the surface, and are let out.

The Beaver guard who was busy whittling when you came up to him seems surprised to see you.

"First people all week who've gone out the Badge Granted tunnel." He says as he opens the gate to let you three out into the wide plains below the High Hill.

"It is good to be out of that place.  But I am new to these lands, and there is much that I don't understand of what passes here, friends.  Could you please tell me something of yourselves, and of these lands, and of the powers and authorities here, and of what options a newcomer has to make his way here?"

"We are all new here, sir. After all, this universe is only three days old." The Fair-ret replies reasonably. "This is the Tribal Lands of the Talking Animals. We each live in our various tribes in the Lands, with my kind living off to the northwest in the Low Hills in little tunnels."

"We Tiny Giants are newer still, added after a rebooting of the universe. I think that means the Admin means to have more than just Talking Animals here. We live amidst the plains among other humanoids and talkings.  We are farmers.  This is my herd of plow-dragging mimmoths.  We have begun building a few cities in the plains, but we just have the foundations now. Need to design it right so that it won't be messed up later."

They also mention the High King who rules over the Chief Badger who in turns rules the Tribal Lands....this is sort of confused.  You get a feeling there is a database somewhere which has both listed as ruling the TL, and the Admin doesn't have it sorted out yet.

You pass a temple, with columns in front of it, and a giant letter R hanging on the front of the temple.

: Hmmm.  Now why, just why, do I suspect there must be some Knights Temple-R around here somewhere??? :

I keep my eyes open as we walk and converse...

:: Ring.  Monitor communications with the system.  See if you can gain access. ::

"What other tribes are you aware of in these lands?  May we compare maps together?"

If we can share maps, I exchange information with them, and add the previously unknown stuff to my map if possible.

"How does one make a living here?  I have heard of dungeons, and of farmhands for the Bears, and of Robin Hood and his merry flock.  Do you know anything of these things, or of other means to support oneself?  Or is it even necessary to do so in these lands?"

"Do you know if it is possible to volunteer time and expertise to become a Mod here?"

::What system?::

They tell you the paths they took, and when you try to match maps, everything freezes, and then you're ten feet further on with them.  No info, at all, is on your map.

"We live among the Bears.  Have farms.  You could volunteer to help build one of our cities." Offers the Tiny Giant.

"We're hunter-gatherers. Eat fish, and small non-sentient animals." Says the Fair-ret.

You ask that question....Kracka-boom.

A lightning bolt from the sky knocks you off your feet.  Smoke drifts off you, and your hair stands up. You're aching, and woozy, and ...

Four tough looking dwarves, with straw in between their teeth, are hustling up the street, and take notice after you've been bolted.

One helps you to your feet.

"Is your name Joe? Do you know anyone named Joe?" The question is asked in a hard voice.

I thank the one that helps me to my feet.

"No, my name is John.  Some call me Oak.  I only asked if it is possible to volunteer time and expertise to become a Mod here, and the next thing I knew I had been hit by a lightning bolt.  Do you suppose that was meant to be encouraging or discouraging?"

There is some discussion between them, but the upshot is that the Band of the Ban Joe is not required to exterminate you even if your name is relatively close to Joe.

"I would think discouraging. When my wife hits me with a frying pan, its not meant to show her love for me." The leader of the Ban Joes says in a deeply country accent.  He's now more friendly.

I grin ruefully.

"I reckon you may be right.  But I'm new here, and still learning.  Please, what are your names, and how long have y'all been here?  What do you know of the lands hereabouts, and their tribes?  What of that temple we passed recently, with the big 'R' outside, or of any other interesting places?  And how does a body make a living around here?"

"Two hours for us.  I think we're the latest update. We are financed by that Temple to the Great God Ralphie, along with his Knight Templ-R's, we  seek out any evil in the land, and destroy it.  Or we will...haven't met any Joes yet.  You could join us in worshipping Ralphie, get a job."

Their leader offers you and then adds....

"Um, we live in the caves below the High Hill, but I have this map which suggest there is something nasty down at the roots of the hill.  I'd hire you to go take a look see so we know what we're facing."

I look over the map thoughtfully.

OOC: Any interesting details?

"Well, a Bird of Pray prefers the open air to the roots of the hills, and I worship the LORD Jesus Christ, so I'm probably not the one you are looking for.  But I thank you for your kind offer."

"Until we meet again, friends...  Fare thee well..."

I resume walking with the Fair-ret and Tiny Giant.

"Were you harmed by the lightning bolt?  And have you ever seen such bolts before?  Or do you suppose it was because of our proximity to that temple when I asked the question?"

There are the following phrases on it...

"Here be draguns."
"Li-brary"
"Dworfhome."
"Gate to Utter Doom."
"Knifeway"
"Guarden of Waiting."
"Supreme Nastiness THis Way–>"

Second...

The Fair-ret is not sure and so he turns about and starts heading toward the temple intending to ask inside to get an answer.

"Please wait, friend Fair-ret..."

"I'm sorry, friend Fair-ret, but I worship the LORD Jesus Christ, and have no desire to enter a temple to any other.  Please don't go there, particularly on my account.  The road together is pleasant, but we must part ways if you would enter into such a place."

Continuing onward (together, hopefully)...

"What did you think of that dwarf's map?  What do you know of 'Draguns', or 'Li-brary', or 'Dworfhome', or 'Gate to Utter Doom', or 'Knifeway', or 'Guarden of Waiting', or 'Supreme Nastiness'?"

The fair-ret is torn between his nature which is to seek fairness, and his naturally sociable side.  He realizes that he won't be able to give you justice if you leave so its pointless, but he sighs deeply anyways.

They have no clue.  They've never been down there, but the Fair-ret is willing to go down there with you, while the Tiny Giant says he can wait outside with a mimmoth herd to carry away any treasure you find, but he's not going underground.  Tiny Giant's heads brush on the ceilings of all but the tallest rooms unless their head is bent over.

And you remember his head being bent in the Badger's office.

"Perhaps there is additional information available..."

"Admin, please access any available help or info files on the following topics: 'Draguns', or 'Li-brary', or 'Dworfhome', or 'Gate to Utter Doom', or 'Knifeway', or 'Guarden of Waiting', or 'Supreme Nastiness'."

I ponder for a moment thoughtfully.

"Admin, please list my current spectators."

Draguns: Large, stationary flamethrowers. May be dragged by team of four oxen. Frequently sentient.

Li-brary: Even the name is a lie. The correct name is Liebrary of Dishonest Books.

Dworfhome: Space-faring warriors from the Klingon race were diminished in size by a transporter accident and took up residence below ground.  Led by the Great Worf, hence the name.  Band of Ban Joes; Rock Bands too numerous to mention, but including heavy metal and infernalist. Violent, aggressive, largely honorable. Do not mention 'Kirk'.

Gate to Utter Doom: Sure and certain destruction.

Knifeway: For your cheap knifeware, buy from the knife guys!

Guarden of Waiting...you have to pass through this to get to the Supreme Nastiness of which no further details are listed other than Real Bad News.

=========

Mod Q$; Seraph of the Pure Fire; Imp Ma'araiz; Entity Unnamed; Lord Traveller–Patron of Versers; The Great God Ralphie; and Charles Randallson.

"Admin, please start chat session with Lord Traveler Patron of Versers."

"Thank you for your kindness in watching me.  Have you any advice for one new to this place?"

-=-

"Hmmm.  Well, it occurs to me that I may be going about things the wrong way.  I seek whatever options already exist to earn my keep, but this is quite a new world, and I have specialized talents, plus badges permitting me to make use of them.  What is to keep me from creating my own niche?  I could make myself useful as a healer and/or missionary, or as a courier and/or messenger.  And for exploration, there may be treasures that may not require being underground.  There are tribes to be discovered, evil to be conquered, and who knows what interesting items to be found?"

"What is your mind, friends?  Do your tribes have any need for those with such skills?  And what are your plans?  Are you returning home to your tribes, or did you wish to quest together?"

–Hello, Master Oak. It is in my field of interest to consider the comings and goings of Versers.  I am most pleased to talk with you, although I will warn you that there are things I may not tell you whether due to strictures laid down by the Creator, or by this Admin being.  And then there are things that I won't tell you based on my own judgment.  But, as I say, I find versers to be terrifically fascinating, and I even have a few who worship me, although i don't expect you to join their number. And you can call me Traveller.–/Genial, charming, pompous, wordy.

The fair-ret and the tiny giant both say that as a healer you'd be welcome to set up in their area.  And the tiny giant says they could use a messenger to go too and fro from the cities.

Their plans are a bit wishy-washy.  They could go back to their tribes, but if you have an interesting enough idea, they'd probably try it.

"Thank you, Traveler, and well met.  Since you are kind enough to talk with me, I will make a query or two, though I understand that some answers may not be forthcoming."

"Are you a verser as well?  What do you know of them, and how?"

"Is there any way that I may be of assistance to the Admin, or to the Mods?  I do have certain talents and expertise, if I can be useful in a manner consistent with my worship of the LORD Jesus Christ."

"I understand that active accounts require spectators, and that I currently have seven.  How many spectators are there in total?  Do you have any impressions as to any preferences or anti-preferences they might have?"

"No, I am not.  I know of how they are made, and I have discussed things with many of them, and some I know because I have spoken to He who made them, on the subject."  He answers.

"There are a number of ways you could be of assistance, but unfortunately, in my view, and I must be delicate here for they are my host, they do not believe they need your help. You are after all, not a Power."

"Several thousand, and the number is growing. Comedy and action. We are not given access to your internal thoughts, and although I could do so by my own right, I would be rude to my hosts."

"I have learned in my travels how to make portals, even to other universes.  However, I have not yet learned how to control the destination.  Do you know how one can control which universe is traveled to?  For example, if I wanted to return to a previous universe, such as the one I originally came from?"

"Some of my belongings were not with me when I last versed out, and are not with me now.  However, I do not feel the usual vector of familiarity in any given direction.  Do you believe that my missing items didn't verse with me?  Or do you believe that there is something in the nature of this place that prevents me from such sensing?"

"Are the spectators merely spectators, or do they have a hand in creating content?  Or is it the case that only Admin and Mods create content, but some of them are also spectators?"

"Am I correct that the use of puns is particularly enjoyed by many of the spectators?"

-=-

OOC: BTW, what are the names of my companions?  I assume that we exchanged names while suffering through the badger badges...

"Well friends, I have a heart to serve and a heart to explore, and it seems to me that the best way to do both is to travel the land."

"We can meet, and hopefully befriend, the various tribes and peoples here and get to know them.  We can meet the needs that the LORD puts in our path, as we are able.  We can oppose the evil we encounter.  We may even get word of treasure, or of artifacts of interest, located in places that all three of us can quest for together.  And the more information we gain concerning all the possibilities there are here, the more opportunities we can identify, and the more informed choices we can make."

"What say you, my friends?  Shall we quest together?"

"I have heard of versers who returned to the universe they came from, but none that was younger than two millenia.  Can you crush a star with your mind? Can you outfight a thousand swordmasters? Can you make a time machine out starting with nothing but a knife?  When you can, ask me this question again."

"It should be in your inventory sub-dimensional bubbleverse."

"Only Admin and Mods can create content, but we may be able to suggest things.  The Mods do sometimes spectate."

"You are correct."

=============

"A Quest!" Cries Pink Nose and Hugh nods.

Soon you're on your way through the Plains, and past small farms with Bears who nod civilly, and then go back to work on wheat, and cornfields, on apple orchards, and honey hives.

And then you see a collection of road signs at an asterisk like intersection that has two stairs going up into the sky at varying angles.

"Ye Darke Woode"
"Back to High Hill and Dworfhome"
"The River"
"Blood Fort"
"Cloud Giant Maze."
"Cloud Giant Bowling Alley"

And one that seems to go in an impossible direction...
"Mad Witches Grove"

Pink Nose the Fair-ret, and Hugh the Tiny Giant.
=============

"Alas, I did not see those missing items when I checked my inventory."

"This inventory sub-dimensional bubbleverse is most convenient.  From what you know of versing and of my current circumstances, do you think it likely that I will be able to keep the inventory sub-dimensional bubbleverse with me after I leave this universe?  Do you know of anything I could do to increase the likelihood of keeping it?"

-=-

I give the Bears I pass a friendly nod in return.  And if any of the Bears seem approachable, I pause to greet them.

"Peace be unto you, friend(s).  We are exploring the lands.  How do you and your folk fare?  Have any here need of healing, or of courier services?  What news have you, either from here or from lands beyond?  What needs are there where we may potentially be of service?"

-=-

I regard the sign thoughtfully, and turn to the others.

"The River looks good to me, though the Cloud Giants could also be interesting.  Do your people know them, Hugh?"

"What say you, friends?  Which direction sounds best to you?"

"Probably not. Magic."

===================

They all seem approachable.  You get a few offers to carry a letter, and heal a sprained paw.

Mr. Bruin replies after you've healed his paw.

"Healer, we fare well.  Steady work, and the quiet life is what we have, and what we desire.  We have no news yet as the world is too young for it to have travelled far.  But if you set up a messenger service so that the merchants we were told will come, will be able to tell us what they need that might be well."

=========

They shrug, and the Tiny Giant pulls out a coin to offer to flip it.

I thank the Traveler, and bid farewell for now...

-=-

Just after healing his paw...

:: Ring... Record this form in slot over form designated "Anakin"... Was form acquisition successful? ::

I consider the Bear's words thoughtfully.

"Perhaps I should try a little experiment..."

"Admin, please start chat session with Mr. Bruin."

"Mr. Bruin, are you able to receive this message?  Please respond."

-=-

"Hugh, do your folk know anything of the Cloud Giants?"

"If you both are flexible, then perhaps we should stick with The River.  That way, we can all stay together with less difficulty, including the mimmoths..."

Assuming the mimmoths are approachable, I would no doubt have been making friends with them as we have been traveling...

BTW, what badges do my companions have? :)

::Successful.::

–Not high enough level.

"No."

You do make friends easily with the mimmoths. They are about one foot tall at the shoulder, but otherwise woolly mammoths.

You head down to the River, and its where you first came up from.

They have weapons badges, and the Fair-ret has a rogue badge as well.

"Hmmm.  Well, that didn't work.  Mr. Bruin, would you please try saying 'Admin, please start chat session with Master Oak'?"

"Admin, what level is required to initiate a chat session?  What level is required to receive a chat request?"

"Admin, please access help files for levels, and for how to gain levels."

-=-

Once we arrive at the River, I consider thoughtfully.

"I arrived near here, and we have just come from upstream.  Shall we head downstream?"

OOC:  Is the water ferry tribe near here?  After my arrival, did I ever wander downstream in my aerial reconnaissance, or were my various stream observations (Sphinx, fifty foot ladder, waterfalls, etc.) in the upstream direction?

How many mimmoths are there?  Do they have names?  Can I tell them apart? :)

Mr. Bruin tries, and fails.

'Level 10. Supernormal information exceeded for ten minutes.'

'Oh gaining levels is easy. Everyone knows that. Get in adventures.' Pink Nose says cheerfully.

Yes to the water ferry tribe. They're still working on maintaining the hydrological cycle.

No, only upstream.

You meet the Sphyinx.

Its fifty feet tall in every direction (again, you get the feeling of a game designer rushing through his project.)

"Hello, Immortal Outsider, honorable Fair-ret, goodman Tiny Giant. You are aware that upon meeting me, you have to answer my riddle.  And if you don't, I eat one of you, or all of your goods."

There are eight mimmoths. You can name them. Sure.

OOC: Having previously scouted from the air, and at fifty feet tall etc., I suspect I could see it in advance, and query my companions as to whether or not they wish to risk this encounter.  Assuming they did, I would at least wait until I was certain that ten minutes had passed... :)

"Peace be unto you.  I am new here, so please pardon my ignorance.  It seems that we take risk by facing your riddle unsuccessfully.  May I respectfully query as to what we gain if we are successful?  For example, how many levels (or fraction thereof) would we advance?"

"One level each."

And yes, ten minutes have passed.  But no, you can't see it in advance (although you do know its there...)

OOC:  Assuming then that my companions wished to proceed...

I look at my companions, and nod.

"Very well.  What is the riddle?"

"The Zodiac is a circle with each Constellation a point of the story of this world. Where do you begin the story?"

I consider, and pray, and nod thoughtfully.

"Does a circle have a beginning, or an ending?"

"Yet the story of this world, and of every world, begins before time, decreed from the LORD God Almighty, Sovereign Creator of all things."

"And He has placed me, the least of the servants of the Son and Savior, the LORD Jesus Christ, before you, a Sphinx of this world, to answer such a riddle."

"Where then is the story of your beginning, the head of a woman, and of your ending, the body of a lion?"

"You are placed here as a witness and testimony to glorify the LORD."

"For your beginning and ending illustrate the beginning and ending of the incarnate LORD Jesus Christ who has saved me, beginning His incarnation within a virgin, and ending as the conquering Lion of Judah."

"For it is written, 'The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork'."

"And so that story of redemption, the Story of stories for this and every other world, begins with a virgin, represented within the Zodiac by Virgo, and ends with a Lion, represented within the Zodiac by Leo."

"Well done, Immortal Verser Level 2 and similarly ranked companions."

OOC: The GM is impressed too.

OOC: Is the fifty foot ladder upstream or downstream from here, based upon my previous reconnaissance?

"Thank you, friend Sphinx.  We are exploring the lands, seeking where we may serve the LORD, and be useful.  Have you any needs, or any advice for us?"

Its on a different path.

"There may be further things like myself. Items taken from other worlds, or copied actually, that mean more than the Admin realizes."

"Do you wish us to come again if we are able?  And are you able to contact us if you wish?"

-=-

After we finish conversing, we resume our journey downstream...

"I am always glad to converse with the Wise, and I have enough levels to be able to Chat."

You pass out of the woods, and down to sheep covered hills.  You see that the sheep and shepherds seem to move very slowly as you pass them on the stony road that circles and winds through the hills.  You meet a Hey Wagon going the other way, loaded with hay, and the occupants four Equuses saying 'Hey' to each and every one of you.  The hey wagon is being pulled by a gentleman of human origin and Spanish descent.

"Admin, please show stats."

I turn to my companions as we draw near to the sheep and shepherds.

"Is it just me, or do they seem to be moving rather slowly?"

I examine them with my Sight as we approach.

"Peace be unto you, friends. We are exploring the lands. How do you and your folk fare? Have any here need of healing, or of courier services? What news have you, either from here or from lands beyond? What needs are there where we may potentially be of service?"

-=-

When we eventually approach the Hey Wagon, I proceed in a similar manner (except this time I don't ask my companions if they are moving slowly ;)

You have two sets of numbers which appear to bounce back and forth. One seems more like the others and gamish. The other seems to match you more closely.

They all have Level 2 in their stats.

"Its just you." The Tiny Giant says, and then laughs. "No, They don't move fast at all, do they?"

In your Sight, they are shepherds.

The shepherd turns to you as if in slo-mo, and blinks at you....

===========

"We fare well." The four Equuses say cheerfully in unison. "And we have plenty of courier services already."

"Yes, provided by the Key Brothers. I am Don Alejandro Domingo Velasquaz Ascensione Ludvig Todd Key.  It is my fate to bear these equus where they will, but it is a hard cruel fate."

"Get back to work, and shut up Don Key!" They all yell.

I stand still, and patiently await a response from the shepherd with a pleasant friendly look of greeting on my face...

-=-

I look with perplexed sympathy at Don Key, and back at the others.

"The Key Brothers?  But I 'marely' see one, and even he seems a little... hoarse.  What other brothers are there?  And why do they provide such services if they find a hey ride to be a hard cruel fate?"

Five minutes later...

"H-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-...."

=============

"They are scattered about the Democracy of the Horse Stables.  We had a vote, and majority rules." The equuses say.

"Fate is undeniable. Its why its fate." Don Key sighs.

One of the equuses gets down, and checks in Don Key's mouth for signs of hoarseness.

"I do believe you are right, sir. He should shut up now if he knows what's good for him." That equus says.  The others echo him closely.

I query my companions...

"Have either of you ever seen or heard of such slowness?  Do they need help, do you suppose?"

OOC: I'm not sure I understand the description about the two sets of numbers.  Could you elaborate?  And how is one set like me?  Are they Versers, or Outsiders, or something?

-=-

I consider thoughtfully.

"So you voted to have Don Key Tow Hay, but that doesn't sound quite right to me.  Somehow, I think somewhere in the windmills of my mind, that should be switched around a bit..."

"Besides, if you drive him too hard, it could be the last straw for the poor Don Key.  He doesn't seem as strong as he must have been in his heyday.  He needs good healing, good feeding, and an end to such a conflicted existence, lest he perish."

"I exhort you to consider, noble equi.  Think of your reputations, and how wildly rumors can spread.  Would you really want to have you Four associated with this Hoarse Man, and with Pestilence, and Famine, and War, and Death?"

They don't know.

Let's forget about the numbers.

========

The sheer mass and power of punnishment drives them to releases Don Key from his reigns over him, and beg his forgiveness.  He's willing,a nd dignified about it.

I attempt to make telepathic contact with the shepherd.

:: You seem to be moving very slowly.  Are you all right? ::

-=-

"Admin...  please list current level, and how far to the next level.  Also please list current spectators."

I look at the others.

"Thank you, noble sirs.  I knew that you all could find an... equi-table solution."

"What are your plans now?"

Contact is made  (+@1 for new use to superslowed).

::y-y-y-y-ee-e:

–
Lev. 1 Experience pt. system not yet operative.  Do you wish to change servers? Same as before, except add Xanth.–

"But how are we to move the hey wagon now?"

"Continue our job of greeting visitors."

"Admin, please start chat session with Lord Traveler Patron of Versers."

"Greetings, Lord Traveler.  I am informed that, even after successful interactions with the Sphinx and with these five hey wagon folks, we have received neither levels nor experience points, as 'the experience point system is not yet operative'.  We have been given the option to change servers, 'same as before, except add Xanth'."

"Do you have any preferences as to which server we use?  Do you believe that your fellow spectators have any preferences?  Are there still seven of you, or were spectators gained or lost during our adventures thus far?"

"The Mod is aware of this problem, and is attempting to fix it. The 'changing servers' is because you are on the edge of one of the earlier server systems, which is why time is running slower there.

You have the same seven viewers as before, but you've added one more.  This Being Xanth is correctly termed 'Demon Xanth' although he is not a demon as you think of the term.  He is of substantial power, being able to casually destroy a solar system, but frankly not the sharpest tool in the woodshed if you take my meaning.  He is usually not interested in your order of beings, but your powerful puns drew him.

We have no server preference as we all experience time in ways that I cannot explain to you given your time-bound mind and brain. But the result is the change means nothing to us."

"Thank you, Lord Traveler."

"What say you, Pink Nose, and you, Hugh?"

They are not that interested in shepherds as nothing happens that interesting with sheep.

OOC: Sigh.  I was actually asking them the same question I asked Lord Traveler: "Any preferences as to which server we use?"...

"Admin...  please change servers.  'Same as before, except add Xanth', as you stated your previous query to me..."

OOC: Note that I have never read any of the Xanth books... :o

You feel for a long moment as if molasses is sprinting past you, as if snails are FTL, as if you're never going to flick your eyelids shut, and then you're normal.  The shepherd looks at you, and smiles.

"Now you're not twittering like a bumblebee."

OOC: Xanth has a lot good about it, but it focuses on sex in inappropriate ways a lot too.  But it has lots and lots of puns.

"Peace be unto you, friend.  I am Oak, and this is Hugh, and this is Pink Nose."

"I am new to this place, and brand new to the Xanth server.  What do you know of the lands here, and of their tribes?"

"Nothing. It has only been two hours since the world was created."  Roger the Shepherd leads you over to a spot thirty feet away and shows you a pair of burnt into the ground footprints. "Here is where I was created.  Then the Great Admin gave me sheep to tend and I got me a staff from a nearby tree."

OOC: And its not the Xanth server.  Just call it the Early server if you need a name.

"Admin, please show map."

I look at my companions.

"Shall I fly up, and take a look around?"

Assuming there are no objections, I take wing and spiral upward, surveying the surrounding lands as I do so...

The map is a very sketchy thing with dashes and X's.

They agree, and you fly up to see a ring of shepherds about ten miles across, and in the center of it, is another circle a mile across where things are moving very slowly.

OOC: What do the dashes and Xs seem to correspond to, at least for what I can see from my current vantage point?  Can I see anything beyond the ring of shepherds, or does it seem like they are at or near the edge of the universe?

I drift a bit closer, in order to see some details of the things within the center circle...

OOC: Geographical features. Its a map, just a very crude one.  Its like this is the alpha first draft of the map program for this universe.

Things beyond the ring seem to move very fast.  You see Don Key run off at what looks like a hundred miles or more per hour, but then you realized that he was walking.

The inner circle looks about a mile across and things seem to be moving very slowly in there. You see a tree 'pop' into existence.

"Admin, please list the servers for the regions below.  Why is the time rate different in the different regions?"

Initial Server, Early Server, Tribal Lands Server, Air Server, Cork Server are all active. For answer of second question, you may make a pilgrimmage to the Help Wizard on top of the Airless Peaks.

"Admin, please list all servers I am allowed access to.  Which server handles the Airless Peaks?  Where are they located?"

I scan from my vantage point to see if there is anyplace that looks like an obvious candidate for the Airless Peaks...

All listed are available to you.  Air Server.

Why yes, there is an ocean in the distance and on the far side of it is a mountain so tall that it has snow only halfway up it.

I attempt to stretch my telepathic senses toward the top of the mountain.

:: Help Wizard, are you able to hear me?  Please respond... ::

If that isn't successful, then I attempt to stretch my clairvoyant senses toward the top of the mountain.  If successful with that, I then try to use telepathy again...

You hit the subuniversal boundary, and are unable to push past that as its very stiff going.  (-50 or is it -30? for such a boundary.)

I frown thoughtfully, and observe whatever other interesting details I can from my current vantage point...

OOC: Which region looks the most "interesting"?  I already knew of interesting things from the Tribal Lands.  Does my current view suggest that the server we have switched to has more interesting stuff than the Tribal Lands?  Or does some other region look better?  Or do Tribal Lands look best?

Your current server has shepherds tending sheep. Seems quite dull.

The next server in has things appearing out of of nowhere.

You know about the Tribal Lands server.

And you've seen the clouds and their giants for the Air server.

"Admin, what regions are served by Cork Server?"

'The city-state of C+++++++ork. And immediate environs, and whatever they've conquered that week.  Also the Underworld.'

As you circle above the shepherds and sheep, you realize something nags at you about the shape they are in.  And then you see several herds in a fractal.  And looking further, the vaster number of herds forming a larger repeated fractal...in the shape of a sheep.

But wind is coming, and with it rapidly comes clouds.  At the edge of the clouds you can see Low Pressure Pixies in blue using reins to steer their segmnet of cloud.

And hail in the shape of dice is falling from the clouds.

"Probability storm." Pink Nose yells on the ground, and ordinarily you'd never hear him, but a freakish combination of wind gusts..

I descend as I see the approaching clouds, so that I won't be caught in the air when the storm reaches us.

As I do so, I reach out telepathically to Pink Nose...

:: What is a probability storm, Pink Nose? ::

::Don't know. I just knew it's name somehow. Who are you?::

And you see plastic dice go spinning past you on both sides.  And for one heartstopping moment, you see three d10 align in front of you, and have 10,10,10 on them, but then an errant wind gust bears them away.

And you're not sure why those dice terrified you as you land next to your friends who stare at you confused.

As I descend to land, I search through Pink Nose's thoughts and recent memories to discern his current perspective on recent events...

He was out here with his friends. Some dice landed near him. His friends are now gone, and strange people are there.

You land, and you see dice land near you, and one smacks into your head. Its about the size of a grapefruit.

Dazed, you wonder why you're pink feathered now...

OOC: Is that the only thing I am confused about?  Or do I also not recognize Pink Nose and Hugh any more?  What exactly do I remember clearly, and what have I forgotten?

Confused, I rub my head where it was smacked, and bend down to examine the offending die, and the other dice nearby.  Do they seem to be made of something transitory (like melting ice), or something more permanent?  Are they clear, or opaque?  What shape(s) and color(s) are they?

Intrigued, I start gathering them, making a collection to examine, both through mundane senses and through my Sight.  I also observe those falling from the sky, to see if they seem any different through my Sight than the ones already on the ground...

Yes, that's the only thing you're confused about.

Your head is hard and smooth.  A quick examination reveals you're now a plastic pink flamingo with metal legs...animated.  You feel a strong urge to stand still when Pink Nose looks at you.

The dice are a variety of substances. Most are ice, including yellow ice. But some few are granite, and fewer plastic, and fewest jewel.  Most of the non-granite are clear and colored.

D10s are most common, but every type you've seen is there.

In your Sight, the ones falling through the air flame with Power.  Those on the ground, no.

OOC:  Can I still fly?  What is Hugh doing?

I quickly gather all the jewels I come across, as well as some granite and plastic.

Then as I look up with my Sight, and see the ones falling through the air flaming with Power...

:: Ring.  Initiate flight capability.  Fly up toward the edges of the cloud and the Low Pressure Pixies at maximum speed. ::

OOC: No.

You soar in the Ring's power.  And you come up to the Low Pressure Pixies who squeak at you.

I stretch out my telepathic senses toward them...

An icy rage breathes through your mind.  Its a hundred pixies or more all speaking in gabbling fury.

You cannot make out individual words, but you do get a sense that you're not the chief focus of this anger.

:: Dearest LORD, please bless my interactions, and help me to be a blessing, I pray... ::

If there is one that looks more prominent or leaderly, or paying more attention to me, I focus upon that one.  Otherwise, I focus upon the closest one.

:: Please, why are you all angry? ::

An image of rage floods your mind.  High Pressure Pixies. Vile, disgusging creatures that need destruction.

And you realize a minute later you're flying toward a distant cloud with rage and fury pulsing through you in great waves that would be a thundeirng in your veins, but since you're plastic you have no veins.

I shake my head mentally, trying to clear it of the influence of the direct telepathic contact with the strong emotion of the Low Pressure Pixies.

:: Dearest LORD, it is written that 'the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God'.  So please calm my heart and mind now, and help me to see with your eyes, I pray... ::

I examine the distant cloud with my Sight to see if it has a similar Power signature to the probability storm cloud of the Low Pressure Pixies, and examine the nearby Low Pressure Pixie cloud to see if the probability storm is still in progress...

The simple 'kick the head' or TV doesn't work.  So you pray...and you feel inklings of calm, but the rage smashes through the peace, and surges through you so that you are seeing things with a pink hue...

Yet at the same time, you see more clearly. Your body is filled with rage, but you can see that this fury is the normal expression of the pixies.  It is what they are meant to be.  But you are not a pixie.

I cut telepathic links to the Low Pressure Pixies, and continue to pray.

As I do so, I examine the distant cloud with my Sight to see if it has a similar Power signature to the probability storm cloud of the Low Pressure Pixies, and examine the nearby Low Pressure Pixie cloud to see if the probability storm is still in progress...

You try to cut the telepathic link, and they grab on.  So you try harder, and nothing.  Its like your brain is being held in a vise by a steely hand.

So you pray, but wrath infuses the prayer and you find yourself calling up a tornado which heads toward the high pressure pixies.

The HP have a SImilar but Reversed signature.  And the LP have degenerated into arguements and are no longer a storm, but clouds breaking up.

You do not seem to be in control.  And yes, that was a botch.

:: Ring.  Raise psi shield.  If my telepathic link to the low pressure pixies isn't broken in fifteen seconds, invoke sleep mode on me until the link is broken. ::

Reinforced by the psi shield, I redouble my efforts and prayers to break the link...

The psi shield cuts the Rage down to an Anger, and with prayer and struggle, you're able to regain control of yourself.  Shaking like a leaf, or a plastic flamingo in a hurricane, you stop in your headlong rush toward the HPP.

Now that you're free, you can feel that the attack link is broken between you and the LPP.

And your tornado races on ahead....

Via fervent prayer as well as psi, I attempt to defuse the tornado.

If I am not successful, then I attempt to redirect it toward the LPPs...

How are you doing the psi...?

How are you doing the psi...?

First I pray fervently for the tornado to be defused.

If that doesn't work, then I attempt to use a psi force wall to disrupt the air flow.  I will attempt to create the wall to intersect one side of the tornado, at an angle that would deflect the winds to curve the other way, in such a way that if you looked from above and superimposed views of the undeflected and deflected air patterns together, you would see something like a figure eight pattern...

A gust of wind smacks the top of the tornado and plunges down through it, ripping it apart.

1@1 Pray One Minute, Fervent to Stop Specific Damaging Weather (not a whole storm, but a cloud or a gust or a tornado).

OOC: In ways its too bad as I really liked your onion peeling idea.  It gave me somewhat of an idea with inverting? the tornado.

:: Ring.  Change form to "Kyle the Ariatte". ::

As I wait for the form change to be completed, I look to see what has become of the probability storm and the LPPs, and what is currently happening with the HPPs.

Assuming that the probability storm has passed and that the LPPs are still doing nothing more interesting than squabbling among themselves with clouds that are breaking up, I start heading toward the HPPs.  If the LPPs dislike them so much, then perhaps they are my kind of folks...

::Impossible. Not correct assortment of atoms available.:

You realize that your transformation from Human to Ariatte is primarily from one carbon based lifeform to another with both having very large amounts of water and other elements.  Now, tho', you're a plastic flamingo with steel legs.....

The LPP's continue squabbling, and then start just dissappearing as if they were stepping into tiny trapdoors in the sky, and closing them back around themselves.

You head toward the HPP's, and you're struck by a resounding tide of  song of victorious triumphalism....The Wicked LPP's Have Been Vanquished!!  Destroy them all!! Woohoo!!

::Its considered needful for a stable weather system founded on animate intelligences to limit their choices by giving them racial enemies.:: Lord Traveller chats to you.

:: Well, my adventures have taken a few unexpected... twists and turns... ::

I accompany this innocent observation by an innocent glance in the direction of the dearly departed tornado.  At least a plastic flamingo face is a good poker face.

:: I found the probability storm most... interesting.  My former companions no longer seem to remember me, and similar things could be said of my former form.  ::

:: How are you and your companions enjoying the adventure thus far?  At the moment, it seems to me that I may as well press onwards alone, since my transport options are more flexible going solo.  However, if you folks have any preferences or anti-preferences as to what paths you might enjoy having me explore, I would be interested in hearing them... ::

Assuming that he says nothing to dissuade me, I move toward the HPPs.

"Greetings, friends.  I was attacked by those Low Pressure Pixies, and transformed into this pink plastic flamingo form!  Can you please help me to undo the damage from their unprovoked attack?"

"Very interesting. We've added Coyote." Lord Traveller says. "Or Something that claims to be him.  Hard to tell with these trickster beings."

============

"Did he say he was an ally of the Low Pressire Pixies?"
"Yes, kill him!"
"No, he didn't.  He said he was a Pink Poxie."
"What's a pink ah..."
"How should I know? He said it, not me."

Several HPP converse...

"Those Low Pressure Pixies attacked me!  Please... help me!"

They roll time back so that you've never been a pink flamingo, but you still remember being one, and then flying over to them, but now you're on the ground in your own form.

They are in the far distance.

Your computer devices are beeping, and when you inquire of them ....

:Blue Screen of Doom. Blue Screen of ....:

I fervently pray for the devices to be restored to good working order, and then attempt to reboot them...

Aaaaah! :)

It occurs to you that your machines are smart enough to get twisted into logic loops a la Star Trek and Kirk vs. the Evil Computer by time travel....whereas the human brain is capable of believing two contradictory things at the same time.

I give thanks to the LORD for answering my prayers by providing insight.

Then I attempt to boot into a basic troubleshooting mode, and to archive the memories that took place since just before the probability storm, and to reset the active memory to purge the events since then.

And then, after more fervent prayer, I attempt to reboot again...

::Reboot successful.::

I sigh with relief, and give thanks once again.

:: Ring.  Change form to "Kyle the Ariatte" now. ::

As I wait for the change to take place, I ponder...

The HPPs seem
really interesting and powerful, but also unpredictable and dangerous.

Hugh and Pinknose were fun to get to know, but it is unclear if they remember me any longer.  Either way, they seemed flexible enough as to whether or not we adventured together.  And my adventuring options seem more flexible if I am free to go wherever I can transport myself to, rather than being restricted to wherever all of us can travel to.

As I ponder thoughtfully, I take inventory of the probability storm polyhedral dice I gathered, examining them via sight and via Sight.

: Hmmmm... :

And thus, when the form change is complete, I take wing, and start flying in the direction (or the last known direction) of the HPPs...

You shift form and take off into the air with your wings beating powerfully, the air fresh with new possibilities.

By sight its a rough-hewn plastic die about the size of a golf ball.  By Sight, there is a glimmering of Power deep within.

You fly toward where the HPP last were, and see that they have left in their wake a pile of cardboard boxes fifty by fifty from which you can hear lots and lots of meows.

OOC: How many of each type (gems, granite, plastic) of die do I have?  What type of gems?  Any difference in Sight between the different types?

I stretch out my telepathic senses and Sight toward the boxes...

OOC: 2,5, 10 respectively.  Green and purple.  No.

By your Sight you see the Grim Reaper and a Cat and a Coin flipping in the air.  Your telepathic senses activate.

Upon being presented with this tableau, I direct my telepathic senses toward the visible Cat, and avoid directing my senses toward the boxes.  I also examine the GR and the Cat and the Coin (but not the boxes) with my Sight.

:: 'Peace be unto you.'  You are not, by any chance, acquainted with a gentleman named Schrödinger?  For I have heard rumors that 'Curiosity Killed the Cat', which I certainly have no desire to do... ::

::Indeed, Doctor Schrodinger was my servant. Most intelligent for a human. He brought me bowls of milk when required, and offered a warm lap to sleep in as I instructed him to do so.::

The figuresa are archetypical energies of Death, Cat Beyond Laws, and Fortune Fickle.

That's directed to Humans. I'm a Cat. In fact, Essence of Cat. Most Laws that bind most beings don't apply to me.

Of course.  I serve the Allmaker.  I am not of the Rebels. Instead, I hunt them as mice in the House of Many Worlds.

:I was caught in an Improbability Field Fluctuation which took me off course.  By being.  I was on the trail of some, but I suspect that trail has gone cold.  Do you know of any about?:

:: I am new here, and still finding my way.  I assume that these figures with you are not Rebels, since you are not hunting them.  Do you all usually hunt together, or have you come together for some other purpose? ::

:: I was also affected by the Improbability Field.  I have not experienced such a thing before.  What can cause them, and what effects can they have? ::

"The Reaper is a Lawful Taker, an entropy spirit obedient to the Throne.  The Coin is non-sentient, a mere force.  They are also swept here, I suspect, although the Reaper refuses to talk to me....an old disagreement about nine lives."

"You know the answser to both questyions."

:: I have seen the low pressure pixies and their probability storm.  But it seemed to me that they were merely directing it, rather than causing it.  And I saw but a couple samples of their possible effects. ::

:: Do you know the answer to both questions?  For what knowledge I have is lacking, and I would fain know more... ::

The traditional, and as a Cat, I'm very conservative, way is three questions.  Are you sure you want those to be two of your three questions?

:: Ah, I did not understand that.  Thank you very much for seeking verification.  No, I do not want those to be two of my three questions. ::

:: My first question is: how may I gain the ability to create and to control the effects of Improbability Fields? ::

:I do not know, or otherwise I suspect that I would not have been swept off course.  However, I shall try to give you more of an answer than that.  I suspect the Pixies play more of a role than you thought, so you could capture one, and ransom it for information as one does with leprechauns.  However, I suspect that inherent to Improbability Fields is the lack of control for beings on your level.  I am uncertain that beings on my level could control it, unless they were specially designed to do so.:

I nod thoughtfully.

:: I am not in the habit of capturing and ransoming, though I admit that the low pressure pixies interacted with me in a rather hostile fashion.  I will consider and pray over this. ::

:: Rather than use up my other two questions at this time, I now recall that there are indeed some rebels hereabouts that I have encountered, even in my brief time here.  And I note that you too seek to serve the LORD, and to oppose those that oppose Him. ::

:: There are indeed those with hostile intent about, the low pressure pixies, responsible for diverting you here. ::

:: However, there one I know of that is far more powerful here, and far more rebellious.  If you would, I could tell you what I know, and even join forces with you if you wish... ::

Very well, lead me to the mouse.

The Cat's tail twitches, and then it leaps toward you, and as it leaps it changes and lands next to your feet the size and look of a small housecat.

"Meow."

If the Cat seems amenable, I give it a nice scratching behind the ears.

:: Which mouse would you hunt?  The low pressure pixies, or the more rebellious one? ::

:: And what of these boxes?  Are there any creatures within needing assistance?  ::

Its quite happy, and twirls about your legs.

"The more rebellious ones of course."

"Yes, but they are not in trouble now. They wait, suspended.  And no, its not my gig.  I'm here to chew on the wicked, not rescue the righteous."

:: The fastest way there is to fly.  Make yourself comfortable as you will, and we'll be off... ::

As we ascend and move through the air, I query.

:: What do you know of this place, and the nature of it?::

If needed, I explain as best as I am able about "program New Creation", and the Admin, and Mods, and the Spectator Room, and what I have encountered while here.

And when we arrive, I indicate the structure below.

:: One of those in the Spectator Room goes by the name "The Great God Ralphie".  That structure below with the "R" on it is his "temple".  ::

:: Although the followers that he finances claim that they wish to seek out any evil and destroy it, yet the temple and its founder are in themselves a very great evil indeed, blatantly rebelling against the First Commandment of the LORD God Almighty. ::

:: What is your counsel in this matter? ::

:This place seems chaotic. But other than that, I know nothing as I'm not familiar with the end of the Multiverse. Even for a god, the Multiverse is very big.:

The Cat shakes his head in disgust when you explain.

:Idiots. They think they can do a better job than the Creator.:

The Cat sniffs.

:Let's go to the Temple and kill us a mousie.:: His tail whips back and forth, and he flexes his claws.

:: But what would you do?  Does the LORD call us to physical violence against unbelievers?  Is it not rather the sword of the Word that we are to wield? ::

:: Or do you have the means to directly confront the rebellious leader of this false temple, and engage in hostilities with one that sits in the Spectator Room? ::

I don't know what rules have been laid on you.  I only know that if I find a rebel, I eat them.  And of course, I can go to this Spectator Room....although it would be better if we could lure him here.

Less dangerous than a crowded Nexial Point with multiple interphasing spiritual zone waits....

....He starts talking further, and you realize you have no idea what he's talking about.  Demi-stable interference fields, potential notational volatility second order effects....

I listen with interest to his telepathic discourse, even as it metaphorically goes over my head.  I can use my Perfect Memory to analyze it in detail later, and try to make sense of it.

:: I have a device that is able to open a portal to another universe, but I can't control the destination.  Could you give it, or me, the capability to reliably open portals to destinations that I choose? ::

:: How do you propose to lure him here?  Bear in mind, he may well be observing us now (though he *may* not be monitoring our telepathic communications), so feel free to decline to answer if you deem that wisest... ::

No.

Nobody is watching us right now, we cats can sense when others watch us.  I was...

He pauses to think, or you get the feeling he is accessing data from some other source...

...Have you heard of the sacrifice of Isaac?

OOC: Being in telepathic contact with him, do I get any other impressions regarding this other source of data?

:: Yes, of course... ::

I affirm in a manner that invites him to continue...

Its kinda a godly version of an external harddrive for memory, and it leaves your brain feeling as if its bouncing around in your skull and vibrating.

Perhaps you had too much espresso.

'Well....' You and he walk into the Temple, and up to the main altar while the occasional priest or other worker takes a look at you, and then shrugs. 'Just act natural....I've given you the protection of an 'of course I'm supposed to be here' '

'Now Isaac...' The Cat nods at you, and then at the altar. :)

Inwardly, my first instinct is to refuse, not because I am afraid to die, but because I do not wish to make any sacrifice to a false "god".

But then I recall what Jehu did as he took power after exterminating the house of Ahab...

: "And Jehu gathered all the people together, and said unto them, Ahab served Baal a little; but Jehu shall serve him much. Now therefore call unto me all the prophets of Baal, all his servants, and all his priests; let none be wanting: for I have a great sacrifice to do to Baal; whosoever shall be wanting, he shall not live. But Jehu did it in subtilty, to the intent that he might destroy the worshippers of Baal..." :

So after a moment's hesitation, I ascend to take the indicated position.

And as I do so, I pray fervently, that the LORD will break the power of this false "god", and that the name of the LORD will be glorified in this world...

You lay there, and its kind of uncomfortable as its a bit small, and hard, and cold...

The Cat hums to himself as he looks around for a proper killing implement, finds a dagger, and starts to drag it toward you across the floor with its nose...

"Oh, for crying out loud. Let me do it." And Ralphie appears, a supernerd, but twenty feet tall, and blazing with glory. He reaches for the dagger, and the Cat prepares to jump...

And suddenly another godly presence is in the room, on the far side of the altar.  Its a geeky IT looking guy, also twenty feet tall, and blazing with glory.

"Un unh. Not in my universe." Admin says.

"Why not?  Besides its only a verser.  I hate those guys, specially since that Jhiaxus punk."

"Its icky." Admin says, which is not exactly a strong declaration of moral fiber.

Cat looks at you, still in hiding in his house cat form, and raises an eyebrow inquiringly.

I stand up, and give a respectful nod to the Admin.

"I agree that sacrifices are icky.  That is one difference between this temple and a true church of the LORD God Almighty.  There, the icky sacrifice has already been made, once for all, by the Son and Savior Jesus Christ."

"Well then, if not a sacrifice, how about a duel?  I challenge Ralphie to a riddle contest, to be adjudicated by the Sphinx."

"I propose that if Ralphie wins, then I must let him slay me as the loser of a duel, rather than a sacrifice."

"And I propose that if I win, then Ralphie must allow all the temples in this universe to be converted into worship of the LORD God Almighty permanently, and that he must henceforth not seek worship from anyone in this universe."

"I know that I am but a verser, and that Ralphie is far more powerful than I.  Of course, what chance would such a one as I have against him in any contest?  But it might provide some entertainment for our Spectators, and for our Admin, and be a less icky ending to this affair."

"What say you?  Is the challenge accepted?"

Ralphie accepts, and the Admin does as well.

You are suddenly transported, with Cat hanging madly on your leg, to the Sphynx.

The Sphynx looks at you, and smiles.

"Welcome back, Oak."

Admin is there, in a gold encrusted computer style spinning chair.  Ralphie is there sitting atop a giant plastic ruby coloured die carved into a chair.

"Thank you."

I smile back, genuinely glad to see the Sphinx once again.

"Ralphie and I have agreed to engage in a riddle contest.  If I lose, Ralphie slays me.  If Ralphie loses, all the temples in this universe will be permanently converted into places of worship exclusively for the LORD God Almighty, and Ralphie will henceforth seek no worship from anyone in this universe."

"We have also agreed to appoint you as the adjudicator of this riddle contest, if you would be so kind."

"What should be the rules for such a riddle contest?  Should we provide riddles for one another, or should we answer riddles asked by you?  Does the one who must answer first have an unfair disadvantage, or is there a fair method of proceeding, such as having every turn after the first consist of needing to answer two riddles?  Does the first one to answer incorrectly immediately lose, or is there some total that must be reached?  Or do you ask both of us the same riddles at the same time, and we write our answers down secretly, until one answers incorrectly?"

"You are well known for your experience is such matters.  Your judgment would be most welcome."

"I will ask the riddles, and whoever fails twice shall be accounted the loser of the contest." He flips a coin, and Ralphie wins to go first.

He smirks, and lets you have it (after a three hundred word monologue on how brilliant he is.)

"Is a goto loop in a computer infinite?"

:: Dearest LORD, please give me wisdom, to Your Glory alone, for the furtherance of Your Kingdom... ::

Assuming I don't get any leading to the contrary, I give my reply.

"That depends upon whether or not the state of the program changes in subsequent iterations in such a way as to eventually avoid reaching the goto statement."

"Of course, as a riddle, it could be an issue of semantics.  For example, if the program is written in such a way that the goto statement is never reached in the first place, then it wouldn't even loop once, much less infinitely.  And of course, 'infinite' loops are hardly infinite in a literal sense, unless you are running the program on a computer that will never wear out or run out of power, etc."

'That covers my meaning.  Eventually the computer will wear out.'  Sphyinx says, and gravely nods at you.

He then asks a riddle of Ralphie as to what sings without a throat, and is a house in water.  Ralphie takes a while and then answers 'seashell' which is the correct answer.

The girl Gwen writes with a pen
The girl wears her favorite tuxedo
The girl likes sushi
The girl never gets upset for she is always cool
Who or what is the girl?

I pray silently, and smile, and answer after only a few moments.

"A penguin."

The Sphynx nods, and asks Ralphie an alphabet trick riddle...

The beginningn of Eternity
The End of Time

And so forth.

Ralphie gets it.

The Sphynx turns to you and asks...

If I say a dog's tail is a leg, then how many legs does a dog have?

I pray again silently, and after several moments, smile again.

"Four.  A dog's tail isn't in fact a leg, no matter what someone may say to the contrary."

Times are hard in a small rural town–business is slowing and people are moving out. It so happens that there are two horse dealerships in town. Unfortunately, there's only enough people to support one of the dealerships. So the two owners meet and decide that one of them must leave town. Since neither of them want to leave they devise a competition to see who gets to stay. It is decided that they will race their horses across town. Now they don't want to damage their horses so they change the race rule so that whoever's horse crosses the finish post LAST wins the race and gets to stay in town. So the next day they set off. Both are ambling along taking rests and getting nowhere nearer to finishing. After a few hours, a wise old man tells them to dismount and gives them some advice, after which the two sprint back to the horses, get on and gallop towards the finish line. Assuming that the race rules were not changed – what advice did the old man give them ?

I pray again silently, and after several moments, smile again.

"Quickly, get on the other owner's horse, and cross the finish line first!"

OOC: Does this mean that Ralphie missed this one, and now has one wrong???  :p

Sure.

And I'll now come out with a horrifyingly difficult riddle....

The Sphynx asks a variant of 'Bob is on the left/Joe is across from the fisherman/the bowler is to the right of Bob' type riddle, and Ralphie gets it, but barely.

And now for your really nasty riddle...

This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it? It looks so plain you would think nothing was wrong with it! In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is unusual though. Study it, and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out! Try to do so without any coaching!

I pray again silently, and after several moments, smile again.

"Assuming that you meant 'sounds', rather than 'looks'...  The paragraph is unusual because it is self-referential."

Bzzt. The Sphynx shakes his head ruefully, and turns to Ralphie who does not get it either.

"Read carefully." The Sphynx says and asks you the riddle again. If you get it this time, the contest is over.

I pray again silently...

:: Dearest LORD, please give me wisdom to discern this riddle, to your glory alone, even as you gave such wisdom to Daniel, I pray... ::

Then, IF I do not get prompted toward a different response...

"Interesting.  An entire paragraph that avoids using the most frequently used letter in the English language.  The paragraph is unusual because it does not contain the letter 'e'."

Ralphie screams in outrage, and rips you to shreds.  But not before you hear...

"Admin, it seems the verser has won his bet."

"Very well, transfer all of Ralphie's temple rights to the Creator." Admin says calmly.

I look up weakly with a look of peace, even toward my attacker.

"As it is written... 'Not by might... nor by power... but by my spirit... saith the LORD...'"

"And again... 'The time is fulfilled... and the kingdom of God... is at hand... repent ye... and believe the gospel.'"

I nod in farewell, with an affectionate glance at my friend the Sphinx, and an inviting glance toward the Cat.

Whether he takes that as an invitation to remain here and proclaim the ways of the LORD, or as an invitation to come and verse with me, I know not.

In fact, at this point, there is much that I know not.  This world seems... to be growing... rather... dim...

The Sphynx nods toward you in farewell.

Ralphie screams in fury "I AM."

The Cat smirks at you, and licks its paw, and studies Ralphie the way a good mouser will sit outside a hole.  Cats don't proclaim, they kill.