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07:29, 19th April 2024 (GMT+0)

Learning How to Swim Again.

Posted by cherrhi
cherrhi
member, 1 post
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 07:23
  • msg #1

Learning How to Swim Again

Hello All You Beautiful People!

I'm not real sure if this is the correct place to post this, but after browsing the forums for hours and being unable to find a better place, I'm taking my chances.

I got my start in role play and in fact in the realm of online networking (with people!) on a message board based cooperative writing role play forum connected to a sprite-based MMORPG called Ultima Online. The game itself didn't really do much for me except tickle my exploration funny bone, but the cooperative writing really lit the fire in my veins! I discovered that I not only had a desire to to set scenes and tell stories with others and even had a flair for it, but I had MUSES! My characters had their own voices, emotions and actions that often took my breath away and left me reeling! To this day I look back over things I wrote and scarcely remember writing them, as if I was not the mind behind the keys (oh yes, I kept them!). As time went on and the years flew by, I discovered that new muses would introduce themselves and demand to be made into characters. Sadly, many of them had no outlet as I raised children, held jobs, refocused my priorities, dealt with near crippling health issues, and fought to hold a failing marriage together. I have continued to play tabletop rpg's over the years and spent time in various PC MMO's, but nothing has inspired me as much as pouring forth all that creativity into the written word and watching it eddy, splash, ebb and flow with the creativity of others.

And now for the hard part, at the end of June my marriage ended and I discovered I put so much into my family and my husband that I found myself without very many friends and without a support network. Disabled and unemployed to boot, I'm looking at a great deal of time alone and depressed. So the first two thoughts I had (beyond how am I going to live and how can I make sure to see my babies every day?) were I need to throw myself into something creatively and I need to make some friends online (I'm not good at social media).

So I find myself here. Anxious about learning how to swim again. Worried because this is not the type of pool I'm used to, and hoping I'll remember the strokes. That said, is there anywhere that some of you chat? In or Out of Character? I know not all of you are into being social beyond the games, but I'm a bit anxious and I find it much easier to climb in when I can identify that at least a few people aren't decoys for the zombie sharks.
facemaker329
member, 7105 posts
Gaming for over 30
years, and counting!
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 07:51
  • msg #2

Learning How to Swim Again

Well...most people don't just 'chat' outside of the specific games they're in.  This is a good place to get a feel for some people, but conversation in Community Chat are generally limited to the specific topic of that thread, rather than a general 'getting to know you' conversation.  That said, I've made a few online friends because of stuff I've posted in CC...someone liked what I said or how I said it, invited me to join their game, we talked more in the game's OOC thread...one or two have even reached out on Facebook.  So this isn't a bad way to get to know people, at least on a general level.

Sounds to me, though, like you should really look at getting into some games.  Take a look through the Wanted: Players forum, that where everyone advertises their games and where most players get recruited.  See if there are any games that look appealing...I usually look for games using a rules-system with which I'm familiar, or a freeform/semi-freeform game (which sounds like it might be more your speed, if it was the collaborative writing aspects of online roleplaying that most strongly appealed to you).  Each game will have a thread labelled 'RTJ' (Request To Join), that has instructions on what the Game Master of that game is looking for from players who want to join.

Unlike Ultima Online or other MMORPGs, RPOL is not a single, cohesive game.  It is a platform for people to run their own game, and there are thousands of games on here...and each game is run in the way its Game Master prefers (as long as that doesn't conflict with the site's TOU or other policies).  And the only limit to how many games you can join is your own judgment.  But that is where players really get a chance to interact and know each other.
DaCuseFrog
member, 64 posts
SW Florida
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 11:20
  • msg #3

Learning How to Swim Again

Welcome to the community!

There is also the RPoL Discord channel, which can be a more "in the now" place for conversation.  It can have its slow days and busy days, as it is fairly new and some of the community might not know about it yet.  But it can be a place for conversation about games, or about life in general.

As for the games themselves, you can occasionally find one that does a lot of OOC chat, but it's hit or miss and they generally don't advertise the fact beforehand.
pdboddy
supporter, 696 posts
EST/EDT [GMT-5/GMT-4]
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 12:11
  • msg #4

Learning How to Swim Again

Welcome to RPoL!

There is a discord server for RPoL.  It's usually a little quiet, but there are folks in there chatting at different times of the day.

/chat.cgi

That link is the "Chat" link in the top right hand corner of the main page.

There are a few discussion forums on RPoL, but as others have said, those are usually directed at specific a RPG, for example there's a World of Darkness discussion forum, a FATE discussion forum and so on.

In many of the games on RPoL, there is an ooc forum which has general chatter, but that's usually a small audience of the game's cast.
Yaztromo
supporter, 266 posts
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 12:25
  • msg #5

Learning How to Swim Again

Hem... don't assume that everybody around here knows all the on line social networking ropes... ;)
pdboddy
supporter, 697 posts
EST/EDT [GMT-5/GMT-4]
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 12:29
  • msg #6

Learning How to Swim Again

I assume that anyone who can find their way here can work out how to get into Discord. :P
Yaztromo
supporter, 267 posts
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 12:53
  • msg #7

Learning How to Swim Again

In reply to pdboddy (msg # 6):

Sorry, I was replying to cherri!
I should have used the reply button to her post, but I'm not very good with the ropes... :P
pdboddy
supporter, 698 posts
EST/EDT [GMT-5/GMT-4]
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 12:55
  • msg #8

Learning How to Swim Again

Hah. :P
seraphmoon
member, 82 posts
"Plays well with others."
Talks lots. Reads more.
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 13:22
  • msg #9

Learning How to Swim Again

Was just about to say that when Yaz posted, actually. :) *I* did not know what Discord outside of musical or relational contexts when someone posted about it here, so I had to go look it up. :) Small steps on my journey towards enlightenment, I guess.

For my fellow old and/or clueless homies: Free text and voice chat, get app at https://discordapp.com and use invite found in link to a message in another game

For cherrhi: Don't sweat it. I can empathize with what you're going through; I used to be a highly creative person, had major life event, now am getting back into things slowly. Like other folks have said, the sociability of both games and people here is variable. Some folks have formed lasting friendships here, and some don't engage at all OOC.  I would try Discord for general chat, but be warned that it can sometimes take several hours for folks to respond. :) It can be just chatter sometimes, but I've seen people be very supportive in times of need, too. There are also some people like me who invite and welcome private messages of various sorts.

Find a game that looks interesting, and if ends up meeting your creative needs but not your social, find a second. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.
pdboddy
supporter, 699 posts
EST/EDT [GMT-5/GMT-4]
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 13:24
  • msg #10

Learning How to Swim Again

Just wanted to say that Discord can also be used in a browser, so if you don't want to download anything, you don't have to.
tibiotarsus
member, 57 posts
Hopepunk with a shovel
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 16:24
  • msg #11

Learning How to Swim Again

Honestly, if you can't find a game that makes you go "yes!" by searching the ads, a really detailed post ("I want this and this, on this schedule...") in the GMs Wanted section will likely net you what you want.

Once in the right game, you'll be in an environment where you share interests with people and can hopefully make some friends without having to learn to wrangle Discord, type fast, etc. Perhaps when you've played a bit you can throw that creative energy into making a game about something you're passionate about, and connect with more folk.
donsr
member, 1659 posts
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 18:32
  • msg #12

Learning How to Swim Again

everyone   here  touched  on this one  way or the other?....But   once you enter  a game you will find  folks  you like RPing with.. you'll  see them   else where  in other games... and sooner or later  you will run your own game...

 some of the game here  build   a tight  circle, the real good ones   help new   folks settle in, and the circle grows.

 take  a chance, roll the dice and   enter  a game, it doesn't  cost you anything..nor   does it hurt you   if you leave?

 Having said that... always  tell the GM when you are leaving.. it saves them  trouble and   is   the elast thing you can do  for players who may have been RPing  with your character.
OceanLake
supporter, 1081 posts
Tue 23 Jul 2019
at 19:49
  • msg #13

Learning How to Swim Again

My two-bit's worth:

1. What your feeling is normal.

2. Make a list of things you can do that have economic value. Answer phones? Listen to people whit liabilities? Assemble parts? Work retail, say in a medical supplies store? Proofread.... Take the list to your local unemployment office.

3. Decide how to balance what you can do with/for your children with what you do to take care of yourself. IMO, the more you have your nose above the water, the more likely you can do well by your children.

4. Wild idea: Create a thread in which you post character ideas and/or setting and/or plots. (Make sure you specify that any who use this do so by permission and give you credit.) It's even possible you ability to do this will result in a job. First, though, check with moderators that this would be OK.

5. Good luck, and I hope you find RPoL conducive to your happiness.
icosahedron152
member, 973 posts
Wed 24 Jul 2019
at 03:19
  • msg #14

Learning How to Swim Again

Hi Cherrhi,

As others have said, chat outside of games is limited here, and what there is of it is likely to be found in this Community Chat forum. However, there is opportunity for chat with a smaller group within a game.

There are several of us who like collaborative storytelling, and after you've browsed here a while you'll recognize the names of people you might have common interests with. There are two ways of reaching out to those people: you can look them up in the Search facility on the Home Page to see what games they are running, and send a RTJ, or you can drop a Rmail to them and see if they want to chat. (However, using Rmail to recruit people to your game (when you have one) is Not Allowed.)

There are a number of things that are Not Allowed on Rpol, and it can be a bit of a minefield at first, but the wrist-slaps are not overly painful (unless you're persistently and deliberately stupid) and you'll soon figure out how things are done.

Rpol is like a big gaming convention with thousands of gaming tables (or perhaps a hiring hall). You keep an eye on the recruitment boards and if something you like the look of lists a vacancy, go to the game and introduce yourself. As with any other social group, you'll meet the occasional dork, but most folk here are friendly enough.

If you have interests in particular genres, revealing those may get you a few 'me toos'.

Enjoy Rpol. :)
cherrhi
member, 2 posts
Wed 24 Jul 2019
at 08:02
  • msg #15

Learning How to Swim Again

Wow! Thank you all for your advice and tips!

I do know discord enough to get myself in trouble and have, at the time of this reply, already joined the server.

I will be looking for games or freeform play (much more in my wheelhouse, though I'm no stranger to tabletop and virtual tabletop, I'm sure I can manage the learning curve).

As soon as I can think a little clearer about what exactly I'm looking for, I'll work on my introduction page.

Thank you all again!
pdboddy
supporter, 700 posts
EST/EDT [GMT-5/GMT-4]
Wed 24 Jul 2019
at 10:17
  • msg #16

Learning How to Swim Again

Good luck! :D
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