80.  There is no non-weapon proficiency for pimping (regardless of your ability to attract henchmen and followers).
This message was last edited by the GM at 00:21, Wed 29 June 2011.

81. My 18 Intelligence CN Transmuter is not allowed to convince the 8 Intelligence LN Fighter that the 'Prime Material Plane' is not, in fact, the plane we are currently existing on and that yes, it is quite fine if the evil god we were fighting destroys it in exchange for infinite knowledge and immortality.

82. A baby does not count as an improvised weapon.

82. can't talk about fight club.

83. You do not get roleplaying experience for punning.

awww, why not?

84. You do not get experience points for picking lice from ogre hair.

85. A penis is not a natural weapon and does not cause damage.

86.  You cannot raise enemies from the dead and kill them for extra experience points.

87. For the hundredth time, no, your character doesn't have a copy of the Monster Manual.

87 A. Nor the Players Handbook
87 B. Or the Dungeon Masters Guide
87 C. Or any other likeiwse affiliated material (campaign guides, class books etc.)

88. Flatulence is not a valid fuel for lighting a fire

Mythbusters respectfully disagrees.

I think it's more the supply then it is the physics behind it. You can't really figure out how much gas someone would have in an RPG at any given time. :P


89. I am not allowed to switch out one of the DM's d20's with the special d10 that is the same shape as a d20 during combat.

90: I will not tie a rope to my sword throw it in the celling, swing across the lava pit, land on the dragon, kill it, roll off away from where the body might crush me, while said rolling, I will not end up in the tresure where iI find the most powerfull thing that comes to mind, that said object cannot be a sawed-off shotgun either

91. I cannot order my revolutionaries to walk out of airlock just for the fun of it regardless how much my total is on persuasion roll.

92. Six successes on difficulty 8 is not enough to persuade Sisters of Ra to abandon defending their monastery and follow me in frontal assault on gates of a castle of demon prince. (This one actually happened. GM said "Beat them on Charisma+Leadership difficulty 8" and I did. He then overruled the roll.)

93. I will not take my top off when using special skill "charisma dance"

94. Excessive flatulence is not a proper Non-Weapon Proficiency...nor is it a proper Weapon Proficiency!

Please do.

I have to agree here.

93-A. Vixcis has to come to gaming sessions topless. Or at least in that maid costume she has.

I have a feeling that I've already won post of the month award ;))))

Next you will learn that Vixcis is really a 40 year old hairy man weighing 300 pounds.  :)

She is 40-something, but she's not a man. I'm certain of that.

I know.  I'm just trying to give you a mental image that will blow your mind.

In reply to Heath (msg #56):

Believe me, at the place I work, I've seen worse. Try imagining a 500+ pound 60 year old with more hair on his chest and stomach then most people have on their heads, who's wearing a flannel button-up that wasn't buttoned up...


*shudder*