On one hand? Amalar is unsure if Barby going forward and challenging was the best idea. On the other hand, aggression was inevitable and pulling their attention was probably best.

Mix says, "So... how do we approach that thing? Or are we doing the same thing the villagers suggested and just throw fire at it till it ignites?"

Hunter gets his crossbow ready. "No offense taken, Barby. You would have said the same thing if they were half-elf/half-human."
This message was last edited by the player at 05:28, Mon 24 May 2021.

  "We should probably try to break one of it's wheels so it can't roll into a part of the town while on fire out if spite. Oh if only we knew someone who could make five foot holes in the dirt, the bane of wagon's existence." Joe's player is sorry they ever sassed mold earth, even if they would never take it except as a joke personally.

Barbara nods.  "Good point, Joe.  I'll keep up with the challenges and hopefully get them to face me while you all close in unseen."

The Paladin then raises her shield and begins approaching, raising her voice to be heard by Dib.  (( Full defense in case of extreme range on that cobbled weapon. ))  "Well well well!  I was expecting someone smart given the clever war engines, but I see now that you are wise too!  The challenge wasn't just for fun, Warlord Dib.  It was to show you that I am willing to settle our differences on your terms."

Pyrus looks to the others.  "That sounds like a 'yes' to the 'light them on fire' plan."
This message was last edited by the player at 05:42, Mon 24 May 2021.

Barbara's defensive precaution is warranted when a large crossbow bolt, around twice the size of a normal bolt. thuds into the dirt not far from her... if she wasn't using her shield and being defensive... that bolt could have easily struck her. Given how deep the bolt has embedded itself into the dirt, that turreted crossbow has both range and power... it is just missing accuracy, but that could be due to who is operating it.

Amalar answers Pyrus with, "And a yes to loving the fact that I'm friends with the elements." she does a dance that looks like it came from dwarven society with feet stomping, planted firmly in the ground, and then slamming her palm into the ground.

The ground beneath the wagon's front left wheel sinks into the earth, a 5-foot pothole forming under it!

With a 5ft hole now existing under one of the wheels, the wagon is now slightly off balance and more difficult for those inside the wagon to move it.

Rocky summons his Wildfire spirit 10ft away from the wagon, which ends up burning the wagon as Rocky has the spirit move 30ft away from the wagon and then uses his bonus action to command the Wildfire spirit to throw a flame seed 40ft at the wagon which hits it inflicting additional fire damage.

While the wagon itself seems vulnerable to fire damage, it doesn't seem to remain burning as if something or someone inside the wagon is putting the fires out almost as fast as the fires burn.

OOC: Dice roles within Roll20, so the Wagon endsup hit with the fire damage from summoning the wildfire sprit and then hit by the Flame seed for a total of 31 fire damage after vulnerability. The wagon is now at 34/65hp. The wagon is not on fire.

Barbara quickly closes in on the wagon.  "It matters not to us that you are too cowardly to face me one on one.  You can die in a fire!"

She inhales deeply then lets out a fiery breath weapon!

"But the rest of you can still switch sides!  Abandon that fool Dib and live!"

Caeldrim moves into a position to pelt the Wagon with a firebolt which impacts the side of the wagon and with the fire damage it inflicts it breaks apart the wagon. As some smoke billows out from the wagon, the hatch on the back opens up and six goblins stumble out of the destroyed wagon.

One of the goblins steps back and away from the adventurers and fires off a Fire bolt at Barbara, but the attack misses.
Afterwards a Goblin Grappler tries to hit Barbara first with his scimitar and then with this spiked punch but both attacks miss the paladin.

A third goblin then tries to attack Barbara as well but misses with both of his scimitar attack swings.

Joe is perfectly willing to share the hang back and hurt thing with sharp sticks job with friends.

But Ted? Well Joe has only just met Ted, doesn't even know their name in character. So is suddenly violently territorial of such tasks, and fires off a single acid tinged arrow through the unfortunate goblin's elbow and into their hip bone.

Oh, Joe also gets sorta kinda closer to the brawl. But still not close enough to be the most convenient guy in the world to run up and punch.

OOC: Shot and hit for 10 total damage vs Ted, who had 9 HP max.

Goblin Grappler 1 targets Barba and while he misses with this scimitar, he manages to land a blow with this spiked punch that inflicts 3 damage upon Barba.

Dib makes three unarmed strike attacks against Barbara, but only one lands and it only manages to inflict 2 damage (after HAM reduction)

Goblin Grapple 3 attacks Barbara and lands a critical hit with his scimitar but only manages to inflict 4 damage (after HAM) and then misses with his spiked punch attack.

OOC: OOC the listed damage numbers are after the -3 damage reduction via Heavy Armor Mastery.

Hunter narrows his eyes at Dib. He quietly mutters to himself, "Not gonna leave you alone out there for long, Barby, but damn..." he then calls out, "WAY TO SHOW THEM WHAT A REAL WARRIOR LOOKS LIKE, BARBY!"

With that, he looses a crossbow bolt and gets Dib in the side! He moves closer slowly, gauging his chance to rush in and become a tornado of blades.

Amalar trots to the southeast, takes aim with her bow, and with skill that shows her training from elf society, hits her mark dead-on, nearly downing the goblin in one hit. She smiles. "Maybe some day, I'll down an enemy in one hit like you, Joe." she comments to commend her ally's prowess with ranged weapons.

"Give up, Dib!" she calls out, "We took out your war machine in seconds, we have defeated you and yours before, and have fought far fiercer foes!"
This message was last edited by the player at 05:23, Mon 31 May 2021.

Rocky uses Thorn whip to try and finish off Goblin Grappler 2 while moving the goblin into a less beneficial position and manages to land a critical blow which finishes off Goblin Grappler 2. And then as a bonus action, Rocky has the wildfire spirit fire off a fire seed at Goblin Grappler 1 but the fire seed misses.

Caeldrim Sylvaranth moves up adjacent to Barbara and uses Field Medicine on Barbara recovering 8 hit points of damage, although if Barbara wants to spend a hit die to recover the last hit point of damage she could.

Barbara takes her enemy seriously and actively avoids attacks.  With so many pouring in, she still gets hit hard enough to feel it, but is shocked at how little they hurt.  Eyes blazing with anger she lets out another cone of fire, this time with a shout, "DIE!"

And die, one of them does.

Erg notices that Caeldrim just healed Barbara and thus moves to target the healer and while he misses with this first swing, manages to land his second swing which deals 5 damage to Caeldrim.

OOC: This brings Caeldrim down to 19 of 24hp.
This message was last edited by the player at 05:32, Mon 31 May 2021.

Low level action economy and lucky dice rolls only explain so much.

Now a knife thrown through the eye socket of an already nearly dead goblin? That is captain killsteal 101.

Then Joe throws a second knife at the kneecap of the remaining grappler out of spite, and it sends them tripping to the ground... Five foot down in the hole Amalar made.

So. Turns out, there is another captain killsteal. One of the small woodland creatures nailed to the wagon wheel wasn't quite dead, and now a dying mouse has gained Experience points chewing on a goblin's face.

Dib growls angrily and focuses on Barbara and tries to take her down. And while he manages to land three unarmed strikes upon her, he is annoyed that they aren't doing as much damage as he feels they should. Additionally Dib grumbles as he notices that despite landing three blows, he still hasn't even disrupted Barbara's concentration on her Dragon Breath spell.

OOC: While all three attacks hit without a critical hit, after HAM the damage was respectively 6, 2, and 2 for a total of 10 damage leaving Barbara with 20hp.

Hunter rushes in, putting aside his crossbow in favor of dual-wielding! He slashes at Dib, opening up a grievous wound! "Stubborn? Or just stupid?" he asks, "We slaughtered your whole gang and you haven't barely done much to even one of us. A shame, really... you seem like a relatively competent fighter and could have made a lot of money working with us..."

Amalar gives a look of concern to Cael when he is hit, and Barby when she is hit three times, but both seem to be doing fine so far. Still, the distraction of her feelings is enough to throw off her aim as she fires an arrow at Dib and misses.

Upon seeing Dib hit Barbara three times and Caeldrim being hit by another Goblin (Erg), Rocky decides to unleash a Scorching Ray in an attempt to end this before anyone in the party is hurt more severely. While only 2 of the 3 bolts strike Dib, they inflict enough damage to drop the goblin and end the fight.

OOC: Rolled rather well on the damage, the two bolts that hit did a combined 20 fire damage and he only had 15hp left. With Dib's defeat, this ends the fight.

A quick investigation of what the goblins carried as well as what was left within the 'Wagon of Doom' reveals that the goblins had 4 Light Crossbows along with 40 bolts, 3 sets of Spiked Armor, one set of Smoldering Mithril Spiked Armor, a Briarthorn Bracers four scimitars, a spellbook containing Tasha's Caustic Brew, Disguise Self, Feed the Forest, Silent Image, Shield, Cobra Fangs, Detect Poison and Disease, and Alarm. Also on Dib they find a Camper's Respite which seems to have been slightly modified somehow and within the wagon they find a Polybolos crossbow and 30 bolts for it along with a sack of coins and a few bottles of cheap spirits.

OOC:
Spiked armor is a medium armor consisting of a leather coat and leggings covered with lots of spikes typically made from metal or stone. It costs 75gp, has an AC of 14+ Dexterity Modifier (Max 2), has Disadvantage on Stealth and weights 45lbs. The spikes can be used as a weapon with both the light and finesse properties that inflicts 1d4 piercing damage when hit or when grappling an enemy.
The Smoldering Mithril Spiked Armor worn by Erg due to being made of Mithril does not cause disadvantage on stealth, weights only 22.5lbs and has puffs of forest green smoke that rise from the armor. It is considered a magic item or common rairty. The Smoldering Mithril Spiked Armor is worth 395gp, which is still 5gp LESS than a breastplate... [75 for the armor, 50 for smoldering+270 to be made of mithril] This armor does not require attunement.
Also, Erg had a Briarthorn Bracers which is an uncommon wondrous item that does not require attunement. these magically inscribed leather bracers provide a +1 bonus to AC and the wearer does not consider undergrowth and forested conditions to be difficult terrain.]
Dib had a Quirky Camper's Respite which is an uncommon magical rod. While a normal camper's respite only functions as a torch when lit as a rod, this Camper's Respite functions as a burning Alchemical Torch when its brazier is lit. Also while the brazier is lit, the wielder can freely use the Control Flames cantrip, which must have been how Dib prevented the Wagon of Doom from catching on fire.

Within the wagon, the party manages to salvage the turret which is in fact a Polybolos still in excellent condition along with 30 bolts for it, 11 of which are still in the magazine attached to the Polybolos. The Polybolos crossbow is worth 550gp, weighs 48lbs, and does 2d8 piercing with a range of 150/600 but can only fire once a round even with a magazine that can carry 12 double-sized bolts. Loading six bolts into the magazine is an action, it takes one action to deploy or put away the polybolos and it cannot before when not deployed on a stationary surface (if places on a vehicle the vehicle can still move while the polybolos is ready to fire.) The bolts have double the cost and weight of normal crossbow bolts so collectively the 30 polybolos bolts are worth 3gp and weigh 4.5 pounds.
A few bottles of cheap spirits collectively wort 7gp and a total of 13gp and 247sp with most of the money being in a sack.

This message was last edited by the player at 23:02, Wed 02 June 2021.

Barbie scoffs.  "This is beyond stubborn, stupid, and insane.  That even one of them would be this reckless would be remarkable, but ALL of them?!  I suspect they were magically driven mad, have rabies, or both.  Be careful with the bodies."

While the others deal with looting, she sings her customary hymn of victory.

Pyrus wooos and hollers at the villagers.  "Did you see that?!  FWOOSH!  KABOOOM!  BLAMMO!  Fire magic for the WIN!"

Which reminds Barbie.  "Earth magic for the win.  Thank you for immobilizing their 'fortress,' Amalar."

Amalar hurries over to Cael and Barby. In a worried tone, she asks, "Caeldrim, Barby, are you two alright?"



Hearing Barby comment on Amalar's magic, she answers, "Thanks. Was Joe's idea; it hadn't crossed my mind to immobilize them until he suggested it..."

Mix adds, "Let's not forget Amalar, Joe and Hunter all used arrows. And Cael healed Barby at risk to himself. But yes, the fire magic was flashy as always." a smile accompanying that last statement.

Hunter then looks at Barby and says, "If only, Barby. Most goblins are quite aggressive and sometimes fight to the death because they aren't thinking past the idea of destroying their enemy. Oft times, an injured goblin is too battle-frenzied to even notice they are in pain or about to die. It is ironically why such goblins still flourish despite their near-suicidal actions."

Hunter thinks about the roles being reversed. If he and his group rolled into a town of evil folk in an armored vehicle that then got utterly destroyed by the enemy in seconds... he believes his team would have the sense to flee and regroup to fight another day.

Seeing the spiked armor, though, Hunter quickly gets to trying it on. "...ooooo... can't fault 'em for taste. This armor is totally wicked!"
This message was last edited by the player at 23:50, Tue 01 June 2021.

   Joe shrugs, "I'm sure you would have thought of it anyways Amalar, still fire worked well, but you all noticed it didn't STAY on fire."

  "It is hardly unique to these goblins to be self destructive in battle, it only stands out because they are the only things that count as 'people' instead of beasts, demons, and petulant elements we have fought in a while. Dwarves or elves are usually just as recklessly suicidal when you face them as enemies... So I wouldn't be surprised if it is something huge like giants that run away like cowards if a fight goes badly, just to make sure our lives in combat are never sensible"

  Gee Joe, what are the odds military trained giants with massive swords and armor would run away like little baby cowards rather than face a medium sized humanoid in direct combat?

  "Get used to anything and everything preferring to fight to the death, and only fleeing from battle if they think it will inconvenience us more than rushing up to stab us. It isn't just my cowardice and not wanting to chase down my food that made me practice with a longbow... And also probably why we should help the town set up the ballista for themselves, to make sure more attackers regret it coming and going."

  OOC:
Noting for later. Tim and I talked and had the general outlook of-
  1: +1 AC and ignore greenery difficult terrain bracer for barby. So barby ignores barbs on bushes.
  2: fancy "No stealth penalty" medium armor for Hunter.
  3: Mundane "Still stealth penalty" spiked armor for whoever wants it. (Comedy option: use it as materials towards making human sized studded leather if we can't just find/buy studded leather for when Joe hits level 4 and the magic of tabletop games means I'm suddenly better off with light armor than medium).

Magic camp respite should probably NOT go to Joe since it looks like 99% of my torch interactions is throwing them.  Also making the peasants heavily armed and give them the big crossbow.