A Bard's Tale.   Posted by Narrator.Group: 0
Grabthar
 Player, 35 posts
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 03:48
A Bard's Tale
The secret ingredient in the eggs, cheese, 'n diced meat is squirrel!  Waste not, want not!

"That it is, my friend.  Plenty for all!"

Grabthar has a big enough appetite, he might even place 4th in a halfling village's eating contest!  So he carries plenty for himself and to be shared.
Joe
 player, 431 posts
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 03:54
A Bard's Tale
  Chessnut.  So good at sleep theft they don't poke themselves stealing caltrops.

  "Thanks, Grabthar."  Joe appreciates not having to do it himself, as much as anything.
Callie
 NPC, 335 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 03:57
A Bard's Tale
The group happily eats, though eventually, Chestnut finds he has caltrops and wonders when and how he got them, examining them like they are a wonder to behold.

The group makes it back to town without event or ambush because this RP isn't about battles.

On the way back, of course, Chestnut is sure to sing and play on his violin.
Grabthar
 Player, 36 posts
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 04:00
A Bard's Tale
"Most welcome, sir!  I do hope you find it agreeable."

Grabthar is loving the break from nonstop combat!  In some of his travels, even the elk was aggressive.  And he's sure to compliment Chestnut's music, of course.
Joe
 player, 432 posts
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 04:08
A Bard's Tale
  Clearly squirrels are normally supposed to tell the other animals where the party is.

  "You know, it only finally came to mind" Considering his own poor habits when it comes to mentioning names.  "But what is the sorcereres you are after named?"  Their hopes to talk her down probably would not go very well, if referring to the sorceress as 'hey you'.

This message was last edited by the player at 04:08, Mon 12 Sept 2016.

Callie
 NPC, 336 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 04:13
A Bard's Tale
Somewhere, there is a meeting of elk in their secret headquarters, saying that many squirrels died to get them the information on the adventuring team's weaknesses.

Callie says, "Her name is Maren."

Chestnut asks Joe, "Can you teach me how to use a bow better sometime?"

Chestnut then looks up at Grabthar and then John. "If you two got in an armwrestle, who would win?"

John says, "Probably Grabthar. Though Callie would give us both a run for our money; her strength for her size is unreal.... but then you all saw how easily she wielded that sword."

Callie blushes. "....."
Grabthar
 Player, 37 posts
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 04:19
A Bard's Tale
Grabthar lets out a somewhat regretful sigh and nods.  "I am built for destruction while John is built for protection.  So I suppose in spite of my noble air, he would win in a contest of who is truly more noble."

He smiles to Callie and adds, "Though I take comfort in Callie's example that loving arms aught to be strong arms."

Somewhere, a rock biter mourns that his hands were not strong enough.
Joe
 player, 433 posts
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 04:22
A Bard's Tale
  "Tip number one, you'll have to get a bow small enough for you to use first."

  Sehanine Cleric training includes bear hugs and bench pressing paladins, apparently.
Callie
 NPC, 337 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Mon 12 Sep 2016
at 04:29
A Bard's Tale
Chestnut giggles from Joe's tip. When the team makes it back to the town, a couple guards approach the group. "Excuse me, but we need to take the kender into custody."

Callie says, "What? Why? What's the charge?"

The guards answer, "Theft. Apparently, a few things went missing over the night before you bunch set out on your quest. We are apprehending all suspects so we can sort them out."
Grabthar
 Player, 38 posts
Tue 13 Sep 2016
at 03:35
A Bard's Tale
Grabthar frowns and folds his arms at the rude treatment of his friend.

"On the bright side, it appears that at least he's being given the courtesy of due process.  Speaking of processing, we have returned from risking our lives to end the bandit threat and have brought you the survivors for legal punishment.  As one of the town heroes, Chestnut here is due honor and recompense.  Now as for your rascal sneak thief, we'll certainly be keeping an eye out."
Kyle
 player, 1441 posts
 Crossbow of SCIENCE...
 Or MAGIC? I always forget
Thu 15 Sep 2016
at 03:31
A Bard's Tale
  While Joe reasonably trusts Chessnut, he can't 100% dismiss the possibility the Kendar is just that good at absent minded kleptomania that even he didn't notice things being stolen, while stealing.

  "So of the stolen materials.  How much is it worth compared to what we were being paid anyways?" Joe is imagining a pile of stolen goods of mass equal to or greater than an entire kendar.
Callie
 NPC, 338 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Thu 15 Sep 2016
at 04:12
A Bard's Tale
The guard says, "Yes, yes, honor and praise, blabla. Look, you are being paid to take care of the bandits. That is why you guys do what you do. If you did it for free, there would be cheers and adoration. But this is simply your job; nothing more. Your reward is coin. Now if you prefer praise and adoration instead of coin, I will be completely surprised. But when a town guard steals things from the townspeople, does it matter he kept the peace for 10 years? No. He still gets arrested. Just like your friend. Now move aside and let the law do its thing."

The other guard answers Joe, "If the mayor wants to pardon him by docking his pay, that's up to the mayor. Not us. Our job is to take the guy in and let the politicians sort things out."

Chestnut says, "Thanks, Grabthar. Thanks, Joe. But I'm sure you can get me out by finding who really did this. Whoever it is, if they want to frame me, they will have to get all that stuff into my stuff. So let's make a fake set of gear that looks exactly like mine, secretly hide my stuff, and have the constable hold onto the fake stuff. Then if the stolen things magically show up in the fake stuff, they will know it wasn't me."

Callie is quiet, watching and listening.
Grabthar
 Player, 39 posts
Thu 15 Sep 2016
at 04:27
A Bard's Tale
Grabthar wears his nonplussed unamused face, arms still crossed.  "Sounds like someone is jealous of the adventurer's life.  Well I suppose I cannot blame you.  It certainly has a number of advantages, like the freedom to go where one chooses, when one chooses.  But if it were all fun and no drawbacks, I'm sure you would have taken up the occupation long ago."

He was never in the way of the guards, so he doesn't budge.

Grabthar nods to his friend, "Brilliant idea, Chestnut.  I will be more than happy to help out in any way I can."
Joe
 player, 434 posts
Thu 15 Sep 2016
at 04:44
A Bard's Tale
  "Well life in towns would suck without guards, they actually stick around for one thing."  Even if that means ending up nameless casualties along with the rest of a settlement, at least they were there.

  Considering the other night involved stashing stolen goods in clothes Chessnut was already wearing, this is going to be a real hassle.  But Joe isn't quite enough of a jerk to not want to try.
Callie
 NPC, 339 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Thu 15 Sep 2016
at 04:53
A Bard's Tale
One of the guards says, "I like his idea too. But what we'll do is have you bunch follow us to the constabulary. You all keep an eye on his back, we will guard his front. When we arrive, we'll have his things thoroughly searched and categorized, then put it all back together and leave it in a place where stuff can get planted in it. Saves you having to duplicate things and if he's going to be framed, it will happen after the thief knows we are not looking at his stuff."

The guards walk off with the group and do as suggested. This also means Chestnut winds up in pretty much just his underclothing, so Callie opts to wait outside.
Grabthar
 Player, 40 posts
Thu 15 Sep 2016
at 04:58
A Bard's Tale
Grabthar's opinion of the guards is improving!  They seem more interested in catching the real culprit than just pinning it on the convenient Kender and calling it a day.  Even so, he does suspect that it's a guard that's responsible.  So he makes a copy of his own of Chestnut's stuff just in case they decide to alter the original as "evidence."
Joe
 player, 435 posts
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:07
A Bard's Tale
  Joe is just honestly surprised town guards are doing anything that isn't either stopping them, dying, or being absent.
Callie
 NPC, 340 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:10
A Bard's Tale
After the stuff is sorted and reassembled, it is a waiting game and Chestnut lets the group know he'll be fine as he entertains himself with writing music.

Callie heads over to the local tavern with the group. John looks frustrated. Callie just looks calm, if deep in thought.
Grabthar
 Player, 41 posts
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:13
A Bard's Tale
"I'll rejoin the group once our culprit has been caught," Grabthar tells the group, "Meantime, I'll be fighting sneak with sneak.  Tata for now."

And he sneaks off to find himself a good hiding spot to watch the bag so he can catch the culprit red handed.  And if possible, one with a good vantage point for watching other places in town.
Joe
 player, 436 posts
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:15
A Bard's Tale
  "In hindsight, I wonder if mousetraps in his pockets would have actually worked."

This message was last edited by the player at 04:16, Sat 17 Sept 2016.

Callie
 NPC, 341 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:26
A Bard's Tale
Callie says, "....mousetraps? I hope you aren't serious." The player has known other players to be serious about such before, after all. "Well I feel bad just sitting here, but I fear it is the best thing I can do for Chestnut..."

Meanwhile! Grabthar sees that same kender-hating guy visit the constabulary and look all smug that Chestnut is behind bars. Chestnut smiles and waves at the guy, "Wanna hear my latest song?"

The man stops smiling, looking rather angry. "Look how happy he is! This guy obviously has an escape plan!"

The guard says, "Quiet down, you, or we'll gag you and throw you in a cell across from him so you can hear his music for the rest of the evening. We run an orderly jail here, not a nuthouse for anyone to come by and yell at the top of their lungs about how happy someone is."

The man, of course, is furious. "Well... I... I never." and storms off.

While the guards are distracted with the guy, some completely black... humanoid-shaped thing... plants a bunch of stuff in Chestnut's stuff then slinks off like a puddle of ink that bleeds into the shadows.
Grabthar
 Player, 42 posts
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:30
A Bard's Tale
Grabthar, astonished by what he saw, does his best to stealthily follow the black blob.  He wishes he could call for backup, but that would probably clue in the creature that it's time to leave town to torment some other target elsewhere.
Joe
 player, 437 posts
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:39
A Bard's Tale
  "I've seen it work... occasionally. Usually it's just as silly as it sounds" Tom and Jerry make it look so easy.
Callie
 NPC, 342 posts
 Cleric of Sehanine
 Lover Halfling
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:43
A Bard's Tale
Grabthar finds the shadow-thing is no longer there.

Callie gives an eyeroll and a near-laugh smile showing she clearly does not believe Joe. "A deity gave me a violin" sounds equally believable, apparently.
Grabthar
 Player, 43 posts
Sat 17 Sep 2016
at 04:46
A Bard's Tale
Troubled, Grabthar returns to his allies.

"Well I saw the culprit... but..."

He relays what he saw.  "Best theory I can come up with is that the merchant is some kind of dark mage using shadow magics."