"Yes, he knows the best possible way to take candy from strangers." Joe, you're losing what little subtlety you have.

  "So, what's your secret to avoiding overachieving hall monitors anyways?  Or is that closely guarded or something."

The bully says, "Pff... easy. They obey me, 'cause they know I'll beat 'em up if they don't." his tummy growls, because in anime, laxatives work almost immediately. He runs off.

His friends wtf and follow him. Timothius watches them all go with a sweatdrop.

  "I still tell myself he's smarter than he acts, because otherwise he'd forget how to breath."  He looks over to Timmy, "Doubt you're so lucky they stop entirely just from that, but you doing okay now?"

"F... for now, yeah. Thanks." he gives Joe a shy smile. "My name's Timothius... who're you?"

  Joe waves hello, "My name is Joe, I'm just a student.  Don't forget to grab your bag before you leave, that'd just be embarrassing."

Timothius grabs his backpack and nods. "I'll... catch you later." he runs off, occasionally looking over his shoulder at Joe.

Fast forwarding a bit, Timothius looks frazzled, beat up, and otherwise a mess. He's trying to avoid anyone seeing him, but Joe is one of those guys who just happens to be there, you know?

  That he is, in fact he's RIGHT BEHIND YOU... Okay no he's in front of you and a bit to the side.  "Oh, right. The downside of helping people. It get's taken out on the easy target.  Or at least I'm assuming that's what happened."

Timothius looks aside. "No... this wasn't your fault. I tried joining the karate club in the school... and got beat up by the seniors in the club. Said stuff about how me joining is an embarrassment to them and I exist to be their punching bag."

  Joe blinks.  "So, our resident Karate Club is the Cobra Kai?" Reference Quota progression.  "That's about the opposite you're supposed to hear, or at the very least the opposite of what they say to your face, yeesh.  Makes me look downright subtle."

"Thanks for your concern, Joe." Timothius says as he stares at the ground. "I wish I knew what to do..."

  "Well I'm not a complete jerk, so seeing you hassled like that seems wrong.  As for What To Do, you just make it not worth it for one option.  You'll have to get beat up a few more times, but that happens anyways.  Just kick the big idiot in the nuts as hard as you can at least once each time they hassle you in ways that involve more than words.  Eventually it will work into his thick skull "Is it worth it if I get hurt every time, even though I ran him up a flagpole and he STILL DOES IT WHY"...  There may be some logical flaws in this plan, but I've seen it work."

  He shrugs , "That or find someone willing to teach you physical combat for the sole purpose of punching someone's face in for revenge/self defense.  Which would get the same end result as Plan A unless you learn really fast."
This message was last edited by the player at 23:56, Thu 17 May 2012.

Timothius chuckles some at Joe's thoughts. "Well... you know anyone like that? A martial arts teacher?"

  "Well, I've never taught before and I think I'm more VIOLENCE than a traditional school of combat, unless Dad isn't telling me something.  As for him, maybe if you enjoy attempts to shoot you with an Airsoft Gun in your sleep 'So you don't get soft'."

  David Darkthorne apparently refers to the Family Style as Krav MacGyver.

Timothius says, "I'm just no good at violence... but.. wait.. ARE you good at fighting?"

  "Theoretically.  Like that little show earlier suggests, I at least try to avoid violence.  Plus it's not like I've ever dealt with anyone who's methods go beyond brute force.  I've got no skill teaching, just commenting. Things like no matter how skilled a punch is, it still wont hurt if it doesn't touch you, sort of ones."

  That, and he can somewhat freeze up when his instincts are telling him 'okay, snap them in half. Here is a diagram and step by step instructions, DO IT' and his brain is saying 'I would really like to not cripple someone for life and/or murder them'.
This message was last updated by the player at 00:16, Fri 18 May 2012.

Timothius squirms. "Well maybe I'll get lucky like you suggested. But in case I don't... I need to learn *something* and fast."

  "Kick. Them. In. The. Balls.  One step lesson, kick them. In the balls.  Advanced course, kick them in the gut while they are down.  Ignore his pals unless they actually go for you.  I suppose the fact you have claws is just cheating, and also would escalate the situation from retaliation to something authority figures might actually pay attention to now that YOU'RE the one doing the ass kicking.  You're not trying to win, you're trying to make hurting you a painful task not just for your face..

Timothius ducks his head. "I... suppose. I guess I can try..." he looks at the ground again. "I hope that will work against the guys in the karate club."

  "Yeah, Karate club is probably out of your league.  You're not supposed to chase problems, you just make them run crotch first into your shoes if they come to you with violence... Please tell me the Karate club doesn't track you down to hassle you regularly already..."

Timothius says, "...they said they'd hunt me down if I ever stopped cleaning their floors for them."

  Joe eyes Timmy, and pulls out a notepad.  "Right, I think you need to give me the extended list of who is currently physically abusing you or extorting you...  In school. I can only pull out an additional notepad for 'this is gonna be a long list' sight gag once, so we'll start small...er"

Timothius looks hopeful as he begins listing names. He gives short descriptions to go with each name. Basically, if they are big, strong, feared, or otherwise bullies of some sort, they pick on Timothius. Which is a good two dozen names or so (Though maybe only 4 of them are "leaders" of a given group of thugs).

  "I am a terrible role model full of terrible ideas.  You may want to be more passive aggressive when it comes to the Karate Club.  I suppose comical amounts of floor wax will make it somewhat difficult for them to practice."

In the days to come, Joe's advise would prove to be handy. The normal bullies wind up figuring it isn't worth it since Timothius hits them in the balls each time. How he keeps getting them there? He's interestingly creative. One bully gets clever, though, and wears a cup before picking on Timothius.

  Oh look, Joe is coincidentally in the area. Again.  If down the hall.  He scribbles on a paper and holds it up.  'Q: What else is soft. A: Lots of things.'.

  Still, Joe has a small amount of respect for the sheer dedication this guy has for bullying Tim "Oh God Not My Balls" WhateverLastName specifically.