*rrRip*
The cardboard box containing our hero was opened, and his utterly deflated body was pulled from the packaging. Two voices spoke, just out of his line of sight. "Are there any instructions?"

"Not that I see."

"Isn't it supposed to say something?"

Groggily, Hergot/Bozon listened, struggling towards wakefulness with the opening of his packaging. It had been a very boring but stressful however-long-it-had-been since he'd been carefully put in there and sealed inside.

He was expected to say something? Oh dear, these jesters had very limited speech capabilities as he knew well from playing with them. Well, there was one thing that he knew he could say regardless, at least.

His eyes opened a little, finding the movement more difficult than it ought to have been as himself, and he tried to say the one thing that he knew an inflatable jester could without expending any magic. His character name.

"Bozon?"

Bozon could see a young boy clap and exclaim, "Woah, that's rad! Can I inflate it a little, dad?"

"Go on, son! Just be sure to use the bicycle pump."

The boy reaches for the pump, and gets ready to shove it in the lower rear valve.

Bozon's eyes opened a little more, eyes slowly turning in his helpless, deflated face to try and look at the child. It took an effort to do, more like hauling a log than like the simplicity of normal body movement. He privately prayed that it would be easier once he had some air in him.

And from what bit he could see and hear, it seemed like that was soon going to be the case. What was a 'bicycle pump' though? He did not recognize that first word.

A touch of fingers, dulled by the heavy rubber coating his human self. Or... where was his own self, like this? Something to ponder on his own time. Something cold pressed against the base of his spine; he was fairly sure that he knew what it was touching. Apprehension ran through his nerves, not knowing what he was in for but determined to face it like a man. Like his victims had. A taste of his own poison.

The bicycle pump was inserted in the only logical location, and air was pumped in until Bozon was just a little less inflated than was most comfortable for him.

The boy said, "What does it do?"

Before he could respond, he was interrupted by a man dressed in reds and greens, "King Samhradh, the convoy leaving for Nexus is about to depart. If you are going to send your son for schooling at the Tree of Wisdom..."

The boy's father replied, "Go on ahead and report back on potential dangers for the journey. When that task is complete, knight, then we will send Tine to school."

The knight jovially responded, "You just want him to get your money's worth from the jester, don't you?"

"If I do, then you can have your fun with him when you return."

"Ha! Fair enough. I'll return as soon as the task is complete." With that the knight departed.

Tine repeated himself, "So... what does it do?"

As he was inflated, Bozon felt more like a man again. He looked left. He looked right. He peered at the boy like a curious kitten might examine their new owner. So, he was in someone elses' court, was he? And this lad was a prince. He didn't know of a King Samhradh, so didn't know what kingdom he was in anymore than he knew how long it had taken to be shipped here.

He felt a little loose, a little weak and uncoordinated still when the inflation stopped, but with no real experience to compare it to... well, that was starting a new lifestyle.

He started to his feet, attempting to do a pratfall instead of standing up all the way, in a hopefully comical pretense of clumsiness. Something stirred inside of his soul, a bit of stored magic from the stress of the boxed journey slipping into one of the built-in cantrips for an apprentice to practice with.

His red nose tried to light up as his attempt at a pratfall was hindered by the unfamiliar situation of the pump hose still attached to him. He sprawled on the floor, bouncing slightly when he hit before rolling to the side and looking up at King Samhradh.

If his nose had lit up, Bozon got a surprised look on his bearded, funny face and went cross-eyed trying to see it better, lifting one finger to gingerly tap at the side of his nose. It didn't hurt.

The King & Prince watched Bozon with confused curiosity, laughing as his nose lit up.

With the look of a child enjoying his new toy, the Prince said, "Hey Bozon, you look like a weird-dog with a pump-tail. Wag it and bark like a dog!"

The King said, "Enjoy the jester while I get back to work."
King Samhradh walked over to his throne, and people began filtering into the throne-room talking with him about boring kingdom business.

Tine watched Bozon's antics with the pump-tail before pumping him up to normal pressure and removing the pump.

With a merry grin, Bozon rolled over again to crouch on all fours. He panted, though his tongue would not reach past his teeth in his enchanted jester state, and silently pantomimed barking motions. Wagging the pump hose, though, was completely beyond Hergot's ability to figure out how to do. He tried this and tried that, but just didn't have the right muscles to really make it work.

He was delighted to be back to his normal build and about as filled out as he'd been when the enchantment process was completed, prior to being deflated for shipping. He wasn't sure if he was as thrilled about the pump being detached, but seeing as the valve shut itself it seemed like he had nothing to worry about. He posed a few times, flexing his muscles making sure that he had something close to his full, normal mobility. Bozon stood casually by the young Prince, giving him his full attention seeing as this was his owner. Forget that he was royalty himself, and just be a fun toy for Prince Tine to the best of his abilities.



OOC: Could I have a general idea of what King Samhradh and Prince Tine look like? How are the people dressed here? What heraldic imagery seems to predominate, if any? I'm guessing that the knight's red & green garb was either his own colors or a livery of some kind, although that could be completely wrong.

OOC: Certainly. I was holding off, trying to wait for Shadojak to post with some ideas he might have for Summer Court, but I should probably just establish what the place looks like. I hoped your characters would meet briefly, and they yet might do so, but his post rate is not like yours. How do you feel about joining a group with other PCs?

Summer Court was a very large outdoor hall, with giant redwoods lining the perimeter, and 4 inch thick cloth tapestries sealing off any gaps between trees. The tapestries had scenes of celebrations, feasts and coronations. In the centre of the court was a large tree-fountain made of gold with copper leaves. The water poured out of flowers on every branch, and bubbled and splashed just enough to hide any sound of whispering and obfuscate soft voices.

Everything was in warm colours or shades of green. King Samhradh was a redhead with a stunning physique. Like all Elfs, he was slightly effeminate in his face, but anyone would think twice about testing his strength. Every muscle was accentuated by the leaf-armour he wore, which matched his body muscle for muscle. He wore a 32" broadsword on his back, and a flintlock pistol at his hip. His crown was a phoenix nest with a live phoenix sitting presumably on its egg.

Those who came and went wore varying degrees of opulence, some came in sporting nothing but gold and jewels, while a few were dressed in plain unadorned leafwork. One woman even came in wearing nothing but red mud skillfully placed and magicked to stay there.

Almost everyone was an Elf, but there were a few assorted other groups of people.

Tine developed a worried look on his face. "Bozon, can you talk at all? Because I have something I want to tell you, but I'm not sure who I can trust with it."

OOC: Having descriptions helps, as there could be things that a character would react differently to than just having a generic "boy" and "dad" there. I have no objections to being with other PCs, but a high potential post rate would be good, yes.

This place was gorgeous, in Hergot's eyes. That fountain was marvelous craftmanship, and there were so many tapestries he could look forward to eventually studying. Assuming he stayed intact, that was. The locals were a bit unfamiliar in face to him, but those ears gave him a good idea of what kindred they might be of. He'd seen tourists with those ears plenty of times, and some Benli (one of his world's races) had them as well to varying degrees.

The burly, air-filled jester looked down at Tine past his illuminated nose, and tilted his head to the side questioningly. "Bozon?" he queried, using the one unrestricted thing he could say as a sort of Pokémon-speak. The barbarian clown crouched down to be closer to Tine's eye level, shaking his head 'no' and holding up one hand fingers spread, then pantomimed counting his fingers, repeating his name quietly with each finger as Hergot made a (hopefully goofy) attempt to express that he had an extremely limited vocabulary as Bozon.
This message was lightly edited by the player at 10:24, Wed 22 Jan 2020.

"Sweet!" exclaimed Tine. He walked to one of the tapestries and held it aside to go for a walk. The redwood-tapestry walls with no ceiling continued in a complex of halls and rooms.

Once they were alone, Tine continued, "Okay, so here's the deal. My dad's a High Elf, and I'm not. I'm just a run-of-the-mill Elf. That means he'll live for nearly 20 thousand more years, but I'll be lucky to see 1000. I'm only 20 now, so I've got plenty of years left. It also means that I'll never be King no matter what. One of my High Elf siblings will inherit the throne, and even if they all died, the throne has to be occupied by a High Elf.

"I don't mind any of this, I don't have any desire to rule, anyway. But dad feels guilty and keeps trying to treat me like I might one day rule. He means well, but it's ANNOYING!

"He wants to send me off to school, but I've got access to bucketloads of cash. Why do I need school? I want adventure! I wanna see distant lands on my own terms. I wanna run away. I think I'm going to soon, but I'm waiting for a better opportunity. And I want to take you with me. I only have one other friend, and she refuses to go with me until I find someone else to join us. That's you. Will you help me see the worlds out there?"

Bozon followed, listening in a fatherly manner. He didn't know what a 'High Elf' was or how they differed from a common 'Elf,' but from the sound of it these folks had much longer lifespans than any mortal race in his world. Sure, the gods, the Watchers, and major demons might have lifespans seemingly unending, but for normal folks to live so long? Amazing! And Tine was older than he'd thought, as well. He was 27 himself, a grown man with children back home - may they be safe and well! - while Tine was clearly still a child.

However... as the lad's slave, his plaything, did he have the right to deny the request? He wasn't sure, but didn't think so. On the other hand, schooling was very valuable, and Tine's father clearly had his safety in mind. How well would he be able to watch out for Tine's welfare as a balloon buffoon? It was something he hadn't considered at all in choosing this penance. How would an inflatable man with little skill at arms and no combat magics protect an adventuresome youth? With his wits, of course. And, it seemed, focusing on working on his magic quite a bit more than he'd planned, until he could enchant simple talismans and such to help Tine and his friend out. Enja-Osdeon were the makers of the majority of magic items beyond weapons, armor, potions, and books, in his world. Would striving in that direction get him in trouble, seeing the circumstances and agreements by which he obtained his access to their magic? That seemed likely as well. Oh dear.

His pensive look did not show well through the heavy latex coating his face, but slowly, with some reluctance, Bozon nodded 'yes.' He would help Tine.

"Great! Let's go get Jen, she's my friend I was talking about."

Tine lead Bozon to a particularly large tree - about the square-footage of a country church. The tree had been hollowed out, and there were three entryways. Each entrance had a pink-pearl beaded curtain, and the tree itself was shedding cherry-blossoms. Inside the tree, a teacher was presenting a lesson, according to the writing board, on Magus, Mathematics, and Music. Around the outside of the tree were bins, barrels and boxes with an unbelievable range of school supplies and such from all different cultures and worlds. Bozon imagined he could find just about any school related item in them, and he was probably right ((OOC: he was right)).

Tine said, "Dang! Mr. Stick is in the middle of a lesson. This could take hours, and by then Dad'll be looking for me. Do you think you could cause a distraction while I sneak Jen out the back door?"

Bozon's attention wavered between his young master and the numerous things of interest he saw around here. But he was forbidden to be literate as a Burstbarian, or at least to be recognized as being literate. That was why there was no silly, cantrip version of Wisdompreserving in his practice magics despite it being one of the lowest level spells owned by the brotherhood. He wouldn't be able to use it anyway, seeing as the full spell pertained solely to Enja-Osdeon's own mystical writings (unlike, say, the version of Wisdompreserving that clerics of Virya Nia possessed, which could be applied to any literature and more). There were many texts here, and surely some would be useful for trying to keep Tine and Jen up on their lessons while adventuring, but since he could not read or write, he could not pick out suitable works for the children. True, he could grab a few at random as if interested in the colorful covers, but that could make for quite haphazard schooling.

He snuck a read of the writing board from the corner of his eye, though. He wasn't sure what "Magus" was among the Elfs, but he knew something of mathematics and rather more of music. At least, the musical traditions of his world and those of the other-worldly Fasiltumians who had brought their Pantheon of Pavar with them to his world a generation and a half before his birth. And he'd heard alien and sometimes lovely songs from tourists passing through. It was too bad that he couldn't stay and learn with the class, but mystically binding contracts overruled his personal desires. By his own choice, oath, signature, and freely consented-to enchantments, Hergot was a toy not his own man here.

The barbarian clown fingered his beard, head tilted in an exaggerated pantomime of deep thought. The light cantrip in his nose chose just then to end, and the glow went out. A few ideas drifted across his thoughts, and he nodded once, sharply. "Bozon," he said.

If not stopped, Bozon sashayed into the tree-classroom like an uncouth barbarian blundering in uninvited.

While Bozon occupied the Mr. Stick's and the students' attention, Tine and Jen quietly left out the back of the classroom, and made their way to toward the woods.

Mr. Stick laughed at first, then composed himself as the children laughed. His face grew redder and redder as he complained at Bozon in an old Elfish tongue that was far too rapid to follow even if Bozon could understand it.

On the writing board were written a few lines in the common-tongue as well as what must have been old Elfish. The common-tongue lines read:



A list of the students and their current marks and years of study was along the side of the board, and he could see that Jen had studied for 5 years in this classroom, and she was the 3rd best student in the class as well. She'd probably know more about all of this.

Once the students started throwing things at Bozon, Mr. Stick shouted at them to stop and be still and quiet. While his back was turned to Bozon, Bozon could see Tine and Jen waving at him from the treeline, inviting him to catch up to them.

The clown took the opportunity to mentally note what the various texts the children had out looked like, even if he wasn't reading the covers, so that he could try to snag copies of the books outside from the containers.

His reaction to Mr. Stick's barrage of unknown speech was to try and look attentive but dumb, then repeat his clown name a number of times as if asking some sort of serious question. He pointed at his beard, then held his hand about Tine's height off the ground. "Bozon bozon bozon bozon? Bozon, bozon bozon." He pantomimed opening a book and turning pages, then made an 'I dunno' sort of shrug before looking at the teacher expectantly.

His response to being pelted with objects was to look around as if to say 'what did I do?' with body language. Then he tried to mentally essay the cantrip form of Bounty of the Hidden Arts, a cantrip that would conjure a custard-like pie to throw (while edible, it was not very good junk food and of short duration, unlike the full spell that creates permanent, non-magical, nutritious food).

And pie Mr. Stick in the face with it (assuming the magic worked) when he turned back around the board again, before running out to raid the bins and rejoin the Prince and his friend.
This message was last edited by the player at 22:56, Sat 25 Jan 2020.

Mr. Stick looked aghast and said, "What kind of a barbaric buffoon are you?"


23:23, Yesterday: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 31 using 10d6 with rolls of 1,3,2,4,4,1,3,6,6,1.  Conjure and throw a temporary custard pie.

He only intended to throw a temporary custard pie. So he did. But it had far more power behind it than he expected. The pie left Bozon's hand the size of an ordinary pie, but by the time it hit Mr. Stick, it had grown to a 6' tall and deep custard pie, and the splash was so large that the entire classroom was covered in custard and cream. The children laughed hysterically and ate the un-nutritious pie, and Mr. Stick just sat down defeated for the moment.


Bozon grabbed one or two of each of the books that the children had on their desks, but they were all in Elfish and illegible to him. He was about to leave when he felt an overwhelming undeniable urge to grab a few musical instruments, specifically he grabbed a bejewelled flute and lute.

He was easily able to rejoin Tine and Jen who had brought a backpack with her, before anyone in the classroom had time to notice that he was even gone.

Once safely away from the classroom, Tine and Jen broke out into laughter, and Jen said, "Sir, that was hilarious! Mr. Stick-up-his-arse totally deserved that."

Tine said, "Sorry, I should introduce you. Jen, this is Bozon the Burstbarian. All he can say is, 'Bozon'. Bozon, this is Jen, my best friend in the world."

Jen blushed, "Awww. Hey! How did you know that the lute was my favorite instrument?" Jen took the lute from Bozon before he could object.

Tine said, "Yeah, and mine too!" as he grabbed the flute. Tine continued, "Alright, Jen, you said you'd run away with me if I got someone to go with us. How's Bozon?"

Jen scrutinized Bozon, "Welp, he's not what I was expecting, but he'll do. Where do you want to go first?"

Tine said, "Nexus. Specifically the Forest Folk district. From there, the worlds are our oysters to shuck. Did you have anywhere you wanted to go?"

Jen replied, "I want to visit Libraria."

"You would, wouldn't you, bookworm. Alright, let's get started. I say we use the library in your home. Your parents are out and it'll get us to the next place."

"Sounds good to me."

With that they started walking through the woods.

OOC: Does Bozon have a telepathic presence in his latex form?

Bozon nodded vigorously a number of times in happy agreement. He was a barbaric buffoon.



Bozon was flabbergasted by the astonishing pie effect as he exited. He'd had no idea that variation was possible, and it suggested several possibilities to explore for comedic effect in the future. And since Bounty of the Hidden Arts was a generic spell that all of the brotherhoods held in common, as well as all of the Pavaric wizard orders (though they had a different name for it), Hergot wouldn't be transgressing on his agreement not to strive to become a full member of the brotherhood without permission by working on developing personal pie tricks. And he'd seen (well, been at the receiving end of) several such personalized pies from jesters-cum-apprentices in playing with them. Most had just been differences in flavor and quality, though, so this one was still quite a surprise. How useful such pies would be for minding to the needs of the children, he didn't have an idea. Yet.



He had no objection to Jen (nor Tine) snatching the instruments, and if anything was appreciative that they were welcomed with joy. He probably ought to have grabbed an instrument for himself, too, but he only had so many hands and time had been limited. He could find something in their travels, he inwardly reassured himself.

"Bozon," Hergot said solemnly as he bowed to Jen, taking up one of her hands in an aristocratic greeting as if she were the daughter of an equal as he momentarily slipped, forgetting his barbarian role.

He strode along with the adventuresome twosome, taking in what he could of the fine Elfish tapestries and towering trees on the way. A bookworm, eh? That told him a bit more about Jen's interests. He didn't know Tine's oyster reference, but recognized that the saying held some meaning to both Elfs that they understood.


OOC: Telepathic presence? I'm not sure that I understand the question, so I'll answer it from both ways that I see it might describe. If you're asking whether he can be detected telepathically, than yes, he can. His mind isn't shielded or trained in mental defenses at all. If you are asking whether he's capable of telepathy via his magic, than the answer is  no. Mental powers of that sort do not fall within Enja-Osdeon's purview at all, nor are there any telepathy spells in the generic brotherhood spell lists. Telepathy and classic "psychic" powers would fall within Mahkailh's area of expertise as the Brothers of the Mysteries of the Mind.
This message was last edited by the player at 13:09, Sun 26 Jan 2020.

Bozon noticed that there were odd shapes in Jen's backpack - as if some sort of instrument were stored in there. It was a rather large backpack...


Looking upward as Jen and Tine talked, he began noticing the birds and wildlife of this place. There were monkey-squirrels, wispy millipedes with wings, a few tiny 3"-5" humans with wings that sparkled and were sometimes translucent, sometimes solid and sometimes going invisible. He would swear that out of the corner of his eye he spotted odd-shaped hats (mostly green) disappearing behind impossibly small places. There were multicoloured birds in the trees, some as small as a fingernail and a few as large as a shed.

While looking upward, he didn't notice the transition, but Jen and Tine had joined him in his silent observation of nature. The world was so vibrantly colourful and the sky so perfectly blue that it could've been a great sapphire dome overhead. Some of the clouds looked like they were honestly made of wool. The loudest sounds were the symphony of birdcalls. They really were a symphony too. Most birds produce calls that communicate something important to them. These birds also made sounds that were all in the same key at the same time whichever bird was being heard. It was like listening to an otherworldly intuitive improvisational jam-session of rhythmic beauty.

Jen and Tine couldn't help but join in and play along with the sounds of the woods. Jen looked at Bozon, "Do you play anything, Mr. Bozon?"

OOC: however you respond to that...

IC:
Afterward, Tine looked at the cloud that had earlier gotten Bozon's attention, pointed to it and said, "Hey Jen, what does that cloud make you think of?"

Jen looked at it, then at Tine and together they both said, "Ool Brians Library!"

"Let's go from there, shall we?"

"Agreed!"

Jen pulled out her bejewelled lute, and started strumming a haunting harmony that echoed one of the louder bird-calls. She also sang a this poem,

"Bound to the nest,
I spent all of my best,
Days watching over my brood.

Sought east and west,
Put my mind to the test,
Blood sweat and tears for their food.

Yet never I asked,
For their future or past,
I didn't expect gratitude.

And now comes the day,
When they'll all fly away,
If I die, well I know I've been true."

From the sky, a flock of gigantic peacocks landed around them. The beak of any one of these opulent monstrous birds could easily decapitate a grown man. Their talons could disembowel an elephant.

One which was every hue of blue and purple approached Jen, and bent its head down so that its ear was next to the lute as she played the final chords of the tune. As the last chord still vibrated, she placed her hands on either side of the bird's head and touched her forehead to the forehead of the bird. After a moment with her eyes closed, she pulled away with tears in her eyes and softly said, "Thank you."

The bird bowed its head, and then the whole flock sat on the ground, and placed their wings in a position as if to say, "Come fly with us."

Tine smiled broadly, winked at Bozon and said, "Let's go!" as he ran over to an impressively tall black and green peacock and climbed onto its back.

Jen did the same with the blue and purple peacock, as she said, "Come join us, Bozon!"

There was at least one of every 2 colour variation of peacock one could imagine.

The land was as gorgeous as the people, it seemed, blessed with variety and abundance. He'd never seen insects so long as these; could they be flying worms rather than insects (eyeing the winged millipedes)? The local monkeys seemed as playful and intelligent as the ones at home, but more exotic in appearance with their plumed tails and buck teeth. Tiny, winged people? How delightful! He tried not to stare.

The birds, oh the birds! Surely, Vaeran Vo'Hlakanss and Virya Karenn-R'lache had worked in loving concert making such fine beasts of the air! They were like an opera in flight around him, and the beautiful birdsong from so many throats reminded him of what the Pavaric myths said of Dra the Uncaring, forever in hymns of praise and glory to his master, Hnalla, with no thought for anything else. Such a devotion to music...



He nodded, not trying to be silly as he answered her. His lips moved silently for a moment, forgetting his muteness, then he realized his gaffe and grimaced apologetically. He pantomimed the movements of strumming something, though it was not a lute he was thinking of, then pantomimed holding something across his lap and pulling a bow back and forth while fingering strings with the 'holding' hand. A brief pantomime of a third instrument concluded his reply, with light taps that could be mistaken for playing keys but were actually his attempt to show the playing of a sort of wooden drum.



He had a round-mouthed expression of surprise briefly, then nodded. He approached a pale red and silver bird, bowing to it politely and pantomiming to ask 'may I?' before trying to mount if the bird permitted.



OOC: "Vaeran" and "Virya" are honorifics, titles for the more important deities male and female respectively. Vo'Hlakanss is the Rocto-Cathsinnian god of the air, the storm, and flight, while Karenn-R'lache is one of the two "Mother Nature" style goddesses in the pantheon, the gentler of the pair and more associated with woodlands and songbirds than the divine huntress Virya J'Ralrishe-Sle is.

The instruments he pantomimed are roughly analogous to a dombra, igil, and wooden tongue drum respectively.

After Bozon finished pantomiming, Jen pulled out a green wooden object that looked like an igil with it's neck curled up like an unopened fern. She sang in Elfish to it and handed it to him. The moment he held it, it started uncurling it's neck, and once it was straight, it released a bow from the length of the neck. "I asked the wood to mould itself to your ideal instrument, but it will maintain a defensive use. If you hold it like a bow for shooting arrows, and draw the strings with nothing notched in the strings, the neck will bend like a bow and when you release the strings it will shoot an intense sound wave packet. The waves will constructively interfere and deliver a stunning blow to your target."

Time rolled his eyes, "Just treat it like a bow and arrow without arrows and it'll stun or push whatever you're trying to hit."



When Bozon bowed to the bird, it accepted his request. Once all three were mounted, the flock took flight and flew toward the cloud that looked remarkably like real cotton. Once they were close enough, Bozon could see that it was indeed made out of cotton. Furthermore, he also realized that what he thought was blue sky was actually a translucent blue sapphire, and the cloud-shaped cotton was attached to the sapphire. The three ridden peacocks landed on a level portion of the cotton cloud and Jen & Tine dismounted, leading the way into a cotton covered wooden door.

"Try not to be seen," Tine requested.

Cotton decorations and felted things were all along the walls. They made their way along corridors until they entered a library with a vast array of Elfish books. Avoiding the discovery of the librarian, they made their way to the back of the library. Tune and Jen started moving books in one of the shelves in a seemingly random way, while chanting under their breath. Then the books and shelves started moving on their own to make room for a circular he through the shelves about 7' tall. Suddenly they stood back and a distortion of light swelled from the center to the edge, and they stepped through into the distortion. Bozon could see a distorted image of them and light beyond.

Bozon silently expressed his gratitude for the gift, looking over the igil with a keen eye. This was fine magic, to him, an instrument that could choose what kind it would be for the musician. The usage as a bow and arrow(less) seemed a mite strange to him, but he was familiar with them for hunting if not especially apt. Did the Elfs eat meat? He didn't know, and thought about what else a bow like this could be used for, as they travelled. Perhaps bringing down fruit from a high branch? He'd have to try that sometime, though this was not it.



Not being seen seemed like a very non-clownish thing to try to do, but he obeyed Tine's wishes and did his best to avoid detection. The sky and the fluffy cloud-stuff were a great surprise to him. There were so many soft things calling out to be examined in here, but there was also work to be done keeping up with the clever children. And they took priority.

A library, hidden in a fake cloud! How remarkable! It occurred to him that if the sky were a great gemstone, that this land might be underground, strangely outdoors as it seemed. That was another thought to file away and consider at a calmer, restful time as well.

Seeing the children step through, the jester followed his young master, trusting Tine and Jen to know far more of these things than he did.


OOC: Did Jen put all of the books I raided in her backpack? Trying to gauge how I'm handling inventory in-character.

EDIT: Yes, Jen has the books now.

Bozon found himself inside another library - this one seeming to be the inside of a living tree. Once through, Jen and Tine closed up this Portal, and then said loudly, "We can talk now!"

"SHHUSHH!!" was the immediate reply from a stern looking 3' tall woman wearing a pointed hat standing nearby.

Tine whispered, "That's just a Gnome librarian. We're on Nexus now! Let's get out of here."

Tine lead the way to the main entrance which opened onto root-stairs flowing down to the main cobblestone road.

Tine said, "Bozon, I want to buy you a treat! I've got just the place in mind that I trust will just delight your fine tastes." There were shoppes and stalls of every imaginable type. One stall sold maple glazed rats with wings, plucked and shaved and blanched and roasted on a stick. One store sold gears of every material, size and shape - even crystal gears. A man wandering around with baloons, was shouting, "Get your portable steam storage tanks here! Only $5! Heat a house for 6 months in a cold climate." Another shoppe sold candies of every imaginable shape and colour.

The three of them were headed right for an amazing gallery. "Enigmatic Ernesto's Eclectic Emporium" was the sign above the seemingly open window. Someone leaning on the window appeared to be pantomiming rather than actually leaning as they were on a solid object. Glass so clear that it didn't have a refraction differential with ordinary air.

The first items Bozon saw were exquisite statues of creatures he had never imagined - each realistically recreated. There were jewelry displays with gemstones that produced their own internal light of varying colours. A wall of enormous landscape paintings with otherworldly scenes and painted with superb skill. The music coming from the open door was delightful and posh, reminding him of his most privileged days. Men and women, walking and talking animals of every type all dressed in fashions from practically nude to 50 lbs of clothing, jewellery and flare. Actual octopod waiters served trays with 100s of sweet and/or savoury delicacies from 1000's of different planets in 100's of different Oners - according to the sign.

Just as it looked like they were about to go in, Tine turned sharply and ducked into a storefront around the corner of the street into a clown shoppe. A 14' tall sad/angry clown sat awkwardly behind the desk. Only one item was for sale: a carpet bag.
This message was last edited by the GM at 07:35, Tue 28 Jan 2020.

Bozon didn't know what a 'Gnome' was, but the small lady was certainly in charge here and he most assuredly knew what a librarian was. Temples of Virya Nia, Virya He-Enriath, Vaeran Ya-Epre, Vaeran Thumis, and Vaeran Ksarul almost invariably supported libraries and their caretakers in the region around them. On a trip to Javre as a boy, he'd seen a library dedicated to Virya Nanye and her handmaidens, though being male he had not felt especially welcome inside of it. The devout of the sun goddess were almost entirely women, just as those of Vaeran Ro-Sennpadr (war god of virtue - Sir Grarsa's patron deity as well as Nanye's closest theological ally) were almost exclusively men.

Mindful and even somewhat cowed by the librarian's authority here in her domain, the air-inflated barbarian tip-toed after his master and Jen making an over-acted attempt to be quiet as they made their way out.

This Nexus place was astounding to Hergot's eyes and ears. So many things! So many peoples! He didn't know what more than half the goods he was seeing were, or were even for, if they weren't clearly edibles. Statues crafted with the utmost care, of creatures or people he could put no name to even from mythology. Jewels of kinds unheard-of in Havony. Paintings that seemed to be worth a year's taxes in themselves. The most remarkable of folks brushing shoulders with each other. He saw balloons, which while not alive still reminded him poignantly of his condition and why he'd become Bozon. They also reminded him, once the children's adventuring was done, there was a knight back in King Samhradh's court who was eagerly looking forward to playing with him. Well, mind the kids, make sure they are safe and having fun first; struggle to keep from being popped later.

But the shop that they entered held something most surprising to him. Another clown. Of a kind different than his Burstbarian role, certainly, and perhaps of very different origins and cultural background. But still, a fellow funnyman. Probably far more experienced at it than he was, he immediately suspected, seeing as the fellow had his own shop with the theme.

Bozon blinked, looking left and right around himself with round-mouthed, wide-eyed expressions of surprise and curiosity. Only one thing for sale? How specialized was that? Or, perhaps, how poor was the shopkeeper? Hmm. He peered at the carpet bag, but watched Tine from the corner of his eye for any cues or guidance on how the boy wanted to proceed.


OOC: Thumis and Ksarul are Pavaric deities, the others mentioned are Rocto-CathSinnian gods. Nia, Ya-Epre, and He-Enriath have overlapping spheres of influence with regards to their roles as the gods of magic, though their other aspects diverge considerably - Nia governs "good" magic, Ya-Epre handles magic for the sake of magic, and He-Enriath oversees "dark" magic. Nia and Thumis are the main gods of (benevolent) knowledge for the two pantheons. He-Enriath's church puts a heavy emphasis on accurate and comprehensive education regardless of beliefs or religious alignment, while Ksarul's priests run the public schools in Fasiltumian communities and lands which they have subjugated.
This message was last edited by the player at 13:34, Tue 28 Jan 2020.

Tine asked the clown, "How much?"

"Fifty Thousand Days' wages!"

"Sorry, how much in currency?"

"Oh, well why didn't you say so!?"

"Will you tell me how much the bag costs?"

"Of course I will! ..."

"Well?!?"

"Patience, my son, patience! ..."

"We can buy a satchel if-"

"$50,000 and not a penny more!"

"Thank you." Tine reached into his coin purse and pulled out a gemstone. "Do you take Magem crystals?"

"Do I take crystals, the boy asks!"

"Well, this should cover it if you do." Tine handed the Magem crystal over to the clown, and reached for the bag.

"Just a moment! I need to take my stock out first." The clown opened the carpet bag, and pulled out a folded up carpet bag of identical patterns. He handed the folded up bag to Tine and said, "Well, thank you for your business, come again!"

They left the store, and Tine handed the folded up bag to Bozon. "Here you go! Open it!"

As Bozon opened it, he looked inside and saw nothing.

Tine instructed, "Now think of a clown-related item that you might want, and without looking, close your hand as if you were grabbing it."

Whatever item Bozon imagines, he pulls out.

"The bag is an hyper-dimensional storage facility with telepathic item retrieval. This one is pre-loaded with every clown related item in the currently known multiverse. Size isn't a problem, items too big for the mouth of the bag sort of expand on exiting the bag, and can be shoved back in the bag by placing the bag up against them. It's kind of like Jen's backpack, but specifically made for clowns. Do you like it?"

Bozon watched and listened to the exchange. A gemstone was being used as payment, which was something he entirely understood even if he lacked the knowledge to appraise their values.

The bag seemed intriguing. A clown-related item? Hmm.
He reached without looking, and pulled out a rabbit by the ears. The rabbit was holding a banana cream pie which nailed Bozon in the face. Then the bunny wiggled free of his grasp and dove back into the bag while the delighted barbarian blinked stupidly through dripping pie filling, playing along with the trick.

He listened intently to Tine's explanation while cleaning pie off his face and beard, gauchely licking gobs of it off of his hand between wipes. He'd have been soooo horrified to be caught doing something like this as himself, but as a barbarian horrible table manners seemed completely appropriate.

The bag was a what? All right, he understood 'storage' at least, and something about dimensions being involved. Some sort of magic that a proper Antratscheldor-haii would know more about than a bumbling fool like him, he thought.



He nodded vigorously and affirmatively, breaking into a broad grin. Any clown-related item? Not knowing the limits, nor having any real understanding of the scientific explanations that first Jen and now Tine used, the repentant king turned inflatable barbarian clown tried reaching in again without looking, remembering Sir Grarsa both as himself and as he was as the inflated fop of a clown he'd been when Hergot burst him. And praying for a miracle, still blissfully unaware that being popped wasn't deadly in and of itself.

Bozon managed to pull out an inflated clown doll that looked vaguely similar to Sir Grarsa, but was certainly not the man himself.

Jen and Tine laughed, Jen asking, "Were you trying to find a boyfriend?"


Later, the group meandered around Nexus taking in the sights and smells. After about an hour of being tourists in Nexus, turning down a small street they found themselves in a low rent sort of community. Suddenly a group of pirates came out of hiding and snatched both of the children, putting sleep-herb soaked cloths over their noses & mouths. Bozon was blindfolded and tied up, his carpet bag and instrument were kept out of his reach.

In reply to Narrator (msg # 27):



Bozon shook his head 'no' sadly, then paused, reconsidering, and nodded 'yes.' He wasn't at all sure how the children would take a pantomimed explanation of his guilt and regret. Better to go with a friendly misunderstanding, he decided.

He stuffed the doll back into the bag nonetheless.



Horrified by the sudden attack, and caught entirely by surprise, Bozon was chewing himself out in the silence of his head now that he was tied up and the children were in danger. In danger of what, he didn't know, but slavery was far from unknown in his world (there was even a god devoted to it), nor was child abuse of many kinds (which had no dedicated deity in either pantheon). He listened closely to anything he might overhear, and cautiously tested his strength on the cords binding him, wary of his inflatable nature complicating the exertion of his substantial muscles.

This is what he heard:
1 "What is it?"
2 "I heard about them. Semi-sentient balloon clowns. Jesters for royalty."
1 "You think the King will want it?"
2 "Worth a try"

Minutes of silence, then being moved around.

1 "$10 please"
3 "What?! For that!?"
2 "Don't you know what it's worth?"
3 "Of course I do! $9!"
1 "You're robbing us blind, mate!"
3 "Yeah yeah. What did you do with those kids?"
2 "We 'lost' them."
1 "Yeah, hehehe, lost."
3 "Oh well."

Being moved around and chains jingling. Being fitted with a bell-collar.
The blindfold is removed and a burly one-armed pirate with a hook says, "Don't even think of escaping. There's a spike in your collar that will go right through one side of that collar and out the other of I just flick one button. You belong to the Pirate King now. Be a good jester and he may let you go eventually. Fail to entertain, and you will be entertaining in other ways. Got it?" He untied and handed Bozon his bag of goodies and his instrument.

He didn't wait for a reply before opening wooden doors and going into a unique room. The walls and furniture were all constructed of a variety of guns, cannons and ammo, most of it gold-plated. A handsome man wearing a crown was sitting with his legs over the left arm of a gun-throne. He smiled when he saw Bozon and said, "Ah! Entertainment!" And he clapped in anticipation. There were lots of bored looking pirates standing around.
This message was last edited by the GM at 15:46, Wed 29 Jan 2020.

Hmm. So, they had an idea of what he was, but seemed to be operating under the same kind of mistaken belief that he'd sadly held about the inflatable jesters for much too long. Had he been responsible for popularizing them to other worlds via tourists who visited his world?? That was an appalling, sickening thought that metaphorically twisted his guts in knots.

Tourists, though... his world had rules for interactions with them. The Watchers were quite strict about those, and limiting how much of the otherworldly ways tourists had were permitted to impact their world. Did Nexus have Watchers? If so, than one could hope that Jen at least would be protected by their laws, and that Tine would be held for ransom rather than be facing sacrifice on an altar as a princely spell component if a party of tourist adventurers missed their cues and didn't make a heroic entrance in time. He, on the other hand, seemed to be more vulnerable since he wasn't known to be a king as Bozon and wouldn't be held for ransom. But than, that was part of becoming a clown, facing the same dangers he'd put others through and not being recognized as himself. Hmm. Oh dear... Some of the other implications of that chain of thought struck him.

He heard the price, and couldn't suppress a grimace. He didn't know what kind of currency or value a "$" held or purchased, but it was not hard to follow the numbers used and see relative values here. He might be quite expensive to a court, but it seemed as if fencing him wasn't going to be very profitable for the pirates.


The bell-collar didn't surprise him too much, though he suspected it would very much get in the way if he were to be inflated a bit further. What the one-armed man said about a spike was more worrisome. Hergot knew that he was puncture-resistant, but for all he knew their magics might be much stronger than his enchantment. Such a spike would be quite lethal to his normal self, one would think. Unless he misunderstood something, which seemed quite possible. How did this man hold onto things or flick buttons, with only the one arm ending in a hook rather than a hand?

Yet, somehow he untied Bozon and handed him his belongings. Interesting. The barbarian followed him into the astonishingly golden room. Guns were unknown to him as such, presuming that they were a form of wand, but he definitely recognized that it was a theme in the décor and probably meant something. What, he didn't know.

On the other hand, all this metal said that he wouldn't be able to use his cantrips in here. Would the bag still work? He'd have to find out the hard way. There was an audience in here, too... the pirate king's court? Well, well, well. It appeared he had work to do before he could set out to find the children and ensure their safety. Much as he looked forward to facing the risks of being pumped up until he shared his victim's explosive fate, the safety of others was paramount over his own pangs of guilt.

Bowing to the crowned man on his throne, he fell over on his face like a clumsy idiot (intentionally), and tried to use that fall as a distraction to pull some kind of funny prop out of the bag. Let it decide what, if anything, he withdrew and saw in his hand when he got up.

OOC: just to clarify the value issue, one day's wages is comparable to $100 USD. $1 is one day's wages. So $10 is comparable to $1000 USD

IC:

Looking carefully, Bozon saw two gemstones that looked like the one Tine used to buy the bag, where his arm would've been - a violet one and a light blue one.

When Bozon came up, he was holding a fake pirate hook over his hand. The hook was attached to a giant balloon sword.

Edit: wrong colours of gems originally, now fixed
This message was last edited by the GM at 04:50, Fri 31 Jan 2020.

Hmm? A pirate hook, and a funny sword? Well, it was a start to trying to blend in... if it could be called that given how he looked anyway. But it seemed like something a clown would do. Bozon remembered one jester he'd had who had liked to follow members of the court, mimicking their body language like a mocking monkey might do.

The barbaric clown looked left. He looked right. He bent over and looked under someone nearby. Straightening up again, he focused on the scrawniest pirate man he could spot in the court, and swaggered towards him, balloon sword in one hand and carpetbag in the other (temporarily putting his igil in the bag if it didn't reject it).

Pointing the rubber tip of the sword at the fellow's chest, but still a foot or two away from him, Bozon tried to ape the man's reactions from that point. Even letting himself be 'tricked' into bonking or mock-stabbing himself with his own balloon sword if the pirate tried.

The scrawniest pirate in the room was the perfect target for a new jester. He was the sea-dog everyone respected to his face, but laughed at behind closed doors. And he knew it.


OOC: I'm taking liberties with this, LMK if too much
IC:
First Bozon stood hyper-straight back, even overextended backward, arms folded across his chest, deep frown on his face, and nose stuck up higher than any other part of his head. The pirate grunted as if unimpressed, but then the other pirates all broke out into laughter. The scrawny guy knew they were laughing at him.

They were actually laughing at the fact that Bozon was about to get real close to the sharp end of a sword.

But Bozon caught the gleam of the fear of judgement in his eyes, so he overacted a fearful response to the jeers of the other pirates, biting his nails and shaking his knees. This brought out deeper laughs, this time at the irony of how true Bozon's interpretation was, and how dangerous this was for the balloon buffoon. The reaction of the courtroom encouraged Bozon and when he noticed the scrawny pirate put his hand on the hilt of his sword in a frowning superman pose, he exaggerated the same pose but drew his balloon sword and held it out at the scrawny pirate.

At that moment, the scrawny pirate swung up and over Bozon's head, popping his balloon sword as he yelled, "Be off with ya, or I'll off yer head!"

Bozon froze for a few seconds, staring at the popped sword and the real sword. Thoughts spun in Hergot's head.

He dropped the fake pirate hook that had held the balloon sword, and backed away. Soundlessly pantomiming bawling like a little kid whose toy had been broken, the barbarian clown retreated with his carpetbag, heading for the burliest pirate he could spot at a moment's notice. To try and hide behind like that was his "daddy," peering out at the scary, scrawny guy from this supposedly safe vantage.

Before pulling another random prop from the carpetbag, letting it make the choice rather than him visualizing a specific item.

The scrawny pirate took the opportunity to laugh and point at Bozon and get the attention off of him. A look in his eye dared the other pirates to keep laughing in his direction.

When Bozon reached into the carpetbag, he pulled out a 4' long gigantic bright neon yellow and orange wand with a long ribbon of yellow, foam tipped cylinders. It was all far lighter than it appeared it should be. It had the word, "Narf" written in friendly lettering on top, and a very easily understood pictogram of a clown holding the wand with the ribbon-attached end between his hands like in these images: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1sYZ7RI90A

Though he couldn't know at the time, the toy Narf gun had 1000s of disappearing-ink soaked narf bullets of ammo.

Being laughed at was a good thing, from Bozon's point of view. He was a clown, a buffoon, a plaything, a jester like this, not a king needing to maintain some measure of dignity. He could make an utter fool of himself and any embarrassment would be purely in his own mind.

The spiked collar around his neck still scared and worried him, nonetheless, but he wouldn't let that hinder him from trying to be entertaining. Now what was this thing? He eyed the picture of a clown holding the wand, and decided that it would be funnier if the pirates understood this thing one way, and he used it differently.

It seemed soft. Hmm. The barbarian pretend to try and bite the wand, and gave a disgusted look finding it to be inedible. He looked it up and down a few times, feeling things with his hands. Then tried to use the wand as a broom or mop, 'cleaning' the floor with the ribbon. Hergot kept an eye on how his audience reacted from the corner of his eye and with his ears, judging how this attempt at comedy was received.

The entire room was in absolute uncontrolable hysterics. Everything Bozon did that was even remotely funny was dangerously guffawed at. When he was setting up a joke, every eye was placed squarely on him, and not a single breath was taken until the joke became clear. And when clarity struck one, it hit them all with perfection. He could tell that they were picking up on his precise nuances in every way, so much that he might conclude they could even sympathize with his kingly origins and the pangs that brought him to this place. They were awed, they were brought to tears, they were ecstatic through it all, and he was The Clown.

And in the midst of his height of enjoyment, a man dressed in greens and reds burst into the room. The room became fuzzy and everyone else seemed to slow down. The red and green leaf-clad ninja grabbed Bozon by the collar, ripping it open and tossing it aside. He pulled Bozon through the air as if through thick oil, saying, "I'm Summer Knight. This is all part of the Prince's education. You are doing well. Keep up the good work. We are watching." Then he dropped Bozon outside the Pirate courtroom mezzanine, and standing right behind Tine and Jen who were spying on the proceedings, and themselves giggling at Bozon's performance. Where Bozon had been, a large puff of smoke was now billowing upward. The man in green and red leafs left the area and the fuzziness of light and oiliness of the air went away back to normal. The children hadn't noticed him yet.

The very confused clown looked at the kids, then at the latest prop in his hands, and stuffed the prop back into his bag. His hulking barbarian presence tip-toed up behind and between the two young Elfs to try and see what they were giggling at.

"Bozon?" he asked above Tine's head quietly, trying to be unobtrusive.

Tine and Jen squeaked in surprise, too quietly to be heard by the pirates below, and quickly hugged Bozon saying, "You got out!"

Tine was the first to pull away, "Quickly, we have to leave before we're caught. Follow me." Tine lead the way and Jen followed behind Bozon as they crawled through a vent duct and emerged in a library. No one was in the library with them. Jen and Tine moved a series of books while chanting under their breaths and just like in the Cloud Library, a Portal opened up. Having gone through, they emerged in yet another library. This one on board a moving vehicle with a 10' tall ceiling. Looking out the sides, Bozon could tell that they were inside a large metallic shell structure and moving at incredible pace. About 50 mph. This wouldv'e been less impressive if they were riding on some sort of track. Instead, there were giant mechanical legs that moved along the structure like an impossibly large centipede, and they were travelling through the trees of a very dense forest.

"Welcome to a Scuttlebus, Bozon!" Tine celebrated. "There's no classier way to travel than by Scuttlebus - especially this behemoth  brand. Normal Scuttlebuses have one floor. This one has 3 levels - each one taller than the lower deck. This is the lowest deck. Would you like to see the lobby?"

Bozon was glad that he didn't squeak too much when hugged, and followed the kids happily. The vent was a tight squeeze with his musculature, and he feared that they'd need to deflate him if it narrowed anymore.

In this new library, he looked left and right, wide-eyed and acting amazed. Then through the portal, to even more books. It was astounding, seeing so many libraries so close together in time. But, he couldn't try to read anything, because his clown character was an illiterate one. Trying to hide his regrets over that clause - who could have expected to encounter such a vast plethora of written works as an inflatable plaything? - he peered out of a side window, one hand flat against the wall on either side as he boggled at the sight before and beneath him.

He looked at Tine, round-mouthed in surprise and pretense of (silently) whistling in astonishment, then back out the window, and back to Tine again. He looked up at the ceiling. There were more floors above them! He looked back at his young master and slowly nodded yes, wide-eyed.

When looking out of the Scuttlebus he noticed incredibly beautiful trees spanning every color of the rainbow, and in an incredible variety of shapes. Some looked like coral reefs, some like webs, some like antlers and many other shapes besides. There were large spires of variously coloured translucent crystals (non-magical) that reached far above the treeline. Birds similar to those in the children's world flew around, as well as others. A herd of tiny-headed 10-spindly-legged black-skinned beasts that towered over the trees slowly moved about. One was apparently drinking through a long trunk from a lake it was standing in. A t-Rex wandered beneath the legs of one of the beasts.

When he accepted Tine's offer to visit the lobby, Tine lead the way down a corridor, up a spiral staircase and onto a 20' tall level. This area of this level was populated by a variety of sports related arenas, fields and courts. Numerous people were playing games. They ascended another stairwell and came out in the Lobby. The 40' tall Lobby was fairly open, with a dancing floor, perches for winged flying people, and a clear ceiling showing the vast sky outside. The variety of people was breathtaking, there was even a 30' tall couple dancing on the dance-floor.

Jen said, "I'm hungry, so I'm going to visit the restaurant. Want to join me?"

There was so much to see here! Games known and unknown to him being played on the middle level. The dancers were of great interest as well... the tallest (uninflated) people he had ever seen back home were the Lhààshàà-àdyé and Apnié, and he had heard tales of the legendary L'àqu-àlu who were as tall as the lesser gods.

Folks who could fly. A lovely talent, and one he'd seen tourists and some native magic-users possessing quite a few times. And a nice, high ceiling, should someone blow him up with one of the alchemical gasses that were lighter than air.

Were those Ca'ùna? No. The people he was eyeing were similar, but not the same.

A restaurant? Hmm. He looked at Tine for that decision. Was the boy hungry too? If so, encouraging him into going along with Jen seemed like a good idea. If not, well, it was in the prince's hands where he went, and Bozon with him.


OOC: What luck! I found a copy of the files in a different format, and can copy & paste from them, unlike the pdf files. So, proper accent marks :>

Lhààshàà-àdyé = A civilized, purple-skinned humanoid race of willowy build, reach 10' in height. Frequently transformed into a more muscular state to play "giant" roles for tourists.

Apnié = Barbaric ursoid folks from a distant part of his world, sometimes imported as guards. Can reach slightly over 11' tall in extreme cases, but are heavy with muscles under their fur, unlike the above civilized folks.

L'àqu-àlu = Rare mutants of the ape-like Shélèggi people. Whereas a normal Shélèggi is a fair bit shorter than humans, these exceptions can tower to King Kong-like dimensions. Assuming that they survive long enough to reach such heights, as the L'àqu-àlu are plagued by health problems caused by the stress their enormous size places on a body not adapted to it.

Ca'ùna = The minotaurs of his world. In their own culture, they dress in flowing, loose robes and tend to be shrewd merchants, but for tourism they dress and act more like stereotypical fantasy minotaurs, playing the role assigned to them

Jen noticed Bozon noticing the people so she said, "The tall couple are newlywed 200 year old adolescent Djini. They're on honeymoon from their normal job in the Sun Vault back home in Summer Court. You wouldn't believe the kind of magical powers they have. That furry man over there who looks like a fluffy bull is a descendant of the Draconians. Eons ago, the Dragons sent a virus as retribution for humanity's crimes against the Dragons. Those who survived passed on various genetic alterations. Of course some people like that are just different kinds of people from different Oners."

---

Tine said, "I'm starved!"

They made their way to the tables and chairs by the wall, and a bat-winged waiter flew down and landed by the table from somewhere above. The waiter handed out menus and said, "Good day to you all! I am Alfred, and I will be your server. Can I start you off with anything to drink?"

Tine said, "Himbleberry Soda for me."

Jen said, "I'll have a glass of Pskaena 78."

"And for the ... gentleman?"

"Oh he can't talk, wait a minute," Jen interrupted. Then, without asking permission, she projected her thoughts into Bozon's mind, Just think the drink you'd like to drink and I'll read your mind and tell him.

Adolescents? He didn't know a thing about Djini, but if they were not fully grown yet and were already so imposing... Well, at least he could wish their marriage well and hope for them to have a beautiful and happy future together.

He didn't have the slightest idea of who she meant by 'Dragons' and 'Draconians,' though he was familiar with the words (in the common tongue) themselves. Nika'Khàdra were sometimes employed to play dragon roles for tourists, as a reptilian race and closer to the desired build than the Hoyoté-Gò, Ri'ìm, or Hnàhhu. Chàngalà were even closer, but being on the verge of extinction the Watchers had opted to keep that folk away from tourism. And, of course, the legends of Ràan Tsìyah who had allegedly been able to breathe fire without need for spells or artifacts.

He looked at the furry man again and nodded a few times.

--

Bozon started, not expecting anything like that. What? Jen was a sister of the Mahkàilh? Or had studied their arts in addition to those of her own brotherhood? He didn't know what to think, and memories of several drinks he'd enjoyed in the past flickered across his mind's eye, betraying that he hadn't always been a clown or inflatable. Also that his people's actual skin tone was a distinct brown shade OOC: Think Hindu, with some green-skinned (Bènli) individuals. What would be a more appropriate beverage, given his barbarian role as Bozon, though? He tried envisioning salak fruit and their sweet/sour juice.

He eyed the menu, looking at the pictures (if any) rather than words.
This message was lightly edited by the player at 22:49, Sat 08 Feb 2020.

Jen said, "I don't know what Salak fruit is, but..."

The waiter eyed Jen and then said, "Oh! I think I've seen that in one of Chef's new exotic foods order. I'll see what can be done. Take your time with the menus, I'll be back with your drinks as soon as I am able." And he flew off to a compartment about the size of a large kitchen attached to the roof.

The menu had pictures of wildly exotic foods from various places, including one dish from Bozon's world which was considered to be extravagant even for kings. Mostly the meal options were unrecognizable to Bozon, and their descriptions were written in some dialect he hadn't seen up until now.

OOC: Describe the dish from Hergot's world if you like, or if not I'll describe one of the other dishes.

Playing up his 'barbarian' nature, Bozon tried to smell several of the menu pictures. He pointed to one which appeared (to his eyes) to have something resembling raft spider in it, and tried to 'think' a questioning look to Jen. What this?


OOC: Salak is a real-world fruit: https://www.indoindians.com/ev...nake-fruit-or-salak/

OOC: Cool fruit! I'd never heard of it before.


Tine and Jen laughed amusedly at Bozon's antics.


Jen read the description aloud, "Drako Spider Cultivar were produced 1000 years ago by the Sdrankhn Clan Dragons as a culinary gift for the Humagus Wizards in remembrance of their alliance in so many battles through the ages. The Dragon-Designed arachnid was given an edible shell & succulent flavour and texture reminiscent of fresh-baked bread. The flavours play with the nervous system to evoke a joy-of-life sensation filled with the paradoxical juxtaposition of simultaneous existential satisfaction and nostalgia. This dish doesn't seek to explode on your pallet, but it will change your experience of bread forever after, leaving you with a permanently improved love of freshly baked bread. Served with the Ancient Paley Sugarloafs for dessert, and best when paired with warmed Honeymilk of the Nectartree."

Hergot/Bozon had to think that description over for a bit. Why would anyone try to make a meat taste and feel like bread? A gift of remembrance and celebrating an alliance, that he understood quite well (or so he thought), but the culinary concepts here baffled him. That cooking methods and seasonings might differ greatly from what he knew back home, yes. The same variety of meat or fruit might be prepared entirely differently in Javvré than it was in East Roctien, and both wholly unlike how that ingredient might be utilized in cuisines from south of the Nòlan Oblé.

He pantomimed, a crude imitation of a hunting raft spider catching a small fish, then pantomimed mixing bread dough with a hand and patting it into flat rounds for cooking. Then an 'I dunno?' shrug at the end, trying to express his confusion without relying on Jen's Mahkàilh-like mind magic.

After he listened attentively to any explanations or attempted explanations, he pointed at another pictured meal and tried to ask What this? again with questioning look and thought.


OOC: Nòlan Oblé is a significant mountain range dividing the northern and southern portions of the continent that Havony is on. Havony, like the other cities and nations he has narratively mentioned so far, is north of them. Salak fruit, on the other hand, is from the southern portion in his world, and grown in hothouses or with magical assistances in the north.

Jen and Tine laughed at Bozon's pantomime. Bozon was pointing at an image of a conch shell with a squidlike creature sticking out. Tine read the description this time, "Escargot of Scahy are a breed of floating shelled cuttlefish-like creatures called Flignuts from the gas-giant planet, Scahy. When cooked, Flignuts have a nutty texture and hazlenut flavour with a walnut-like softness.  In addition to the delicious buttery nutty flavour, perfectly seasoned by top chefs selected from the most proficient cooks in the known Onerverse. The Flignuts produce copious amounts of nitrous oxide and oxygen, which effervesces in the mouth as it is chewed, and absorbed into the bloodstream for a delightful effect. The gasses are released at just the right pace to maximize fun and minimize forgetfulness or sleep."

Hmm. Havony was a landlocked nation, but he'd seen the sea when he was in Javvré, and had enjoyed various fish dishes in New Fasiltum as well. He did not know what 'nitrous oxide' was, but did know that oxygen was an important part of the element of air. This sounded like something to try, if the kids didn't mind. He kept in mind that all monies being handled here were under Tine's control, and he had no real understanding of the specifics of this wage-currency system himself as of yet.

He nodded several times, pointing to that same picture of the Escargot of Scahy, and patted his stomach trying to say that it sounded good.



OOC: Walnuts are soft? Hmm. I've never had them fresh from the tree, so may be interpreting that wrong.

OOC: Talking about the soft oily nutty flesh of a fresh walnut - especially an English Walnut, which is tastier, but much harder to extract.

IC:
When the flying waiter returned with all of the drinks, he took the orders. Tine ordered the Drako Spider Cultivar, and Jen ordered Bonhemotin infused Metaltree Fruit salad.

Bozon's dish came exactly as pictured, as did Tine's. Jen's salad was various fruits sculpted into an elaborate dragon, swimming in a gelatinous ocean. After thanking the waiter and closing their eyes to take in the smell of the food with gratitude, they ate their dishes with glee.

Admiring all of the dishes, in sight, in scent, and (for his own) in taste, the self-exiled king of Havony greatly enjoyed this, his first meal in a world other than his own. He found that he did have a little trouble chewing the interesting meat, his teeth being somewhat softer and more like tough rubber than like bone in his inflatable jester state.



OOC: I'm not sure that I (the player) understand the relationship in time between the normal IC roleplay and the backstage IC roleplay of the Sideways. Does Bozon already remember what Scord said about a coming tragedy, at this point?

OOC: Good question, and yes he does remember (if you want). Everything that happens in 0C is remembered in 0B as soon as you post (you can say that Bozon is blocking the memory if you like - that would likely happen in reality anyway).

IC:
Tine paid for the meal, and the waiter seemed quite pleased with the gratuities. Afterward, one of the musicians who was playing in the orchestra approached the two Elf children with their instruments visible, and said, "I'm so pleased to see Elfs with instruments. Would you mind terribly filling in? Some of our players neglected to come and we could really use your help! If that jester is any good, we'd appreciate a 3rd extra musician."

Jen and Tine looked at each other smiling, Jen said, "I've been itching to play since I called the birds back home."

Tine replied, "Me too. Bozon, do you want to join in? Can you play along as you sight read the music, or improvise with the band?"

Not understanding the concept of restaurant gratuities as practiced here, Bozon merely understood that Alfred was very pleased with what Tine gave him.

He listened to the words exchanged between the musician and the children. The musical style(s) here were unknown to him, but he could certainly make an attempt to improvise. He tried to indicate via body language and pantomime that, yes, he would like to try. But also that he wasn't sure of his skills.

Retrieving his igil from the carpetbag, the clown was ready to try.


OOC: He's likely to have an easier time figuring out the tala of the music being played than what classical raga best fits it, if the music is of a somewhat European style.
His own people's music has shades of Central and Southern Asia to it. I had a link to a video that included Fasiltumian-style music, but I'm removing it due to some of the visuals which might violate a General game rating.
This message was last edited by the player at 06:33, Wed 12 Feb 2020.

The scenery through the massive translucent walls changes as the sun begins to set to the side. The Behemoth Scuttlebus curves to chase the sunset and extend the beauty of that magical time of evening.

Bozon Jen and Tine sit with the orchestra to play with them. The notes are certainly in a different written form than what Bozon is familiar with, but after a few bars, he's able to figure out the chord progression, and he joins in. The whole room is captivated by the sweet melody, and the dynamic that the 3 unique instruments add. Many of the dancers stop to listen with closed eyes, while a number of people who had been sitting get up to dance.

After a few songs, a lounge singer and pianist relieve the orchestra.

As the orchestra leaves, the conductor talks to the 3, "Thank you each so much!" Looking at Bozon ze says, "I've never heard that style of playing before, what was it?"

After Jen tries to read Bozon's mind to hear his response and voice it, the conductor continues, "I can't pay you directly, but I won 3 tickets to a space walk on a Comowe Portalship. They have to be redeemed in the next month, but I can't make it because I'm committed to staying here for the next 3 months. Would you like them?"

Tine's eyes light up like fireworks, "Oh yes I would! Jen, do you want to go?"

Jen says, "I don't know, I've never been in space before. What do you think, Bozon?"

The confused jester expressed (via Jen) that it was classical music. At least, classical where he was from. Normally, one would sing along with the igil, but he was voiceless.


OOC: I'm using the Hindu terms raga and tala since I don't know the musical terminology of any of the Rocto-Ardae languages, and I'm not going to even attempt to dig up the terms in Tsolyáni.

---

Space? Where was Space? What kind of a country or land was it? But he did belong to Tine (or at least to his father the King), as Bozon, so he pantomimed a collar around his neck with two fingers of each hand, then a long leash which he 'handed' to Tine as a way of expressing that ownership. Where Tine wanted to go, he had to go along with it if it didn't put the prince or kingdom in serious danger.

OOC: Regarding the terms you use - that is perfectly fine to me. I like learning new things.

IC:

Tine just looked confused, and said, "Wait, whaaaaat?"

Jen looked horrified with her jaw dropped. She told Tine, "He thinks we own him! Like a slave!"

"Oh dear Vanach, no!" Time exclcaimed. "When we thought you were a toy, yes, we felt we owned you."

"But once it was clear you were sentient," Jen added, "we considered you a free man in every way!"

Tine offered, "We were honoured at the thought that you chose to stay with us, when you were truly free."

"But we were insensitive, Tine, and we didn't consider him enough to be clear and explain this. We are at fault at this."

"Yes," Tine admitted, "I feel deeply shameful for not considering what you might think about your situation, Bozon. I truly am grateful that you are with us, and I consider you my friend."

Jen added, with tears in her eyes, "Yes, we deeply care for you, our friend, Bozon."

---

After the emotional part, Tine explains, "We in the Summer Kingdom always free the slaves we buy. We believe no one should be forced against their will to do anything, so we free any slaves we inadvertently buy, and free any slaves we politically can."

Jen says, "Tine, Bozon, I'm getting sleepy. I suggest we get some rest, and then make our way to the Space Walk in the morning after breakfast - that is if you are willing to join us, Bozon?"

Either way, Tine buys a 3 bed room for the night. After explaining that Bozon is a sentient balloon-person, the staff offers to swap out the air inflating him for "333OG" as he calls it, which he explains is a super dense Noble Gas. Then he says, "It'll make you weigh 153 KG, but you'll still be mobile. We have gasses to make you weigh anything from -3 KG (Helium) to 153 KG. Just let me what you'd like to weigh."
This message was last edited by the GM at 18:55, Sat 15 Feb 2020.

What?

What had he gotten wrong? Uh-oh.

Bozon crouched down, getting on his knees to be closer to the children's eye level as his parental instincts and urges took over, trying to comfort them and gently wipe away Jen's tears with a rubbery finger.

His brow furrowed, concentrating, as he tried to envision things for Jen to read. The Great Circle of the Antratschèldor-haii, the symbols of the thirteen brotherhoods arranged in accordance to their mutual relationships. The rainbow of Mahkàilh in the middle, the sun of Chélé-Avàii at the top, the dark circle of Gohlaa-Gozàan at the bottom, the lizard of Fàanel-Féléòdji furthest to the left, and the eye of Enja-Osdeön on the farthest right.

Jen, Tine. I am a toy. It is part of my ordeal as an apprentice of the brotherhood Enja-Osdeön. Every Antratschèldor-haii undergoes an ordeal related to the theme of the brotherhood in order to earn full membership in it. In older times, before the coming of Fasiltum, the apprentice primarily served as a secondary supply of power for their master through their ordeal, learning and exchanging their suffering for knowledge in the process. Nowadays, with our economy focused on tourism from other worlds, things have changed a bit. Apprenticing into the Brothers of the Weirding Device, I was made into a luxury magic item for others to use, experiencing what it is to be someone elses' belonging and plaything, within the pre-programmed limitations built into me. I became an inflatable clown entirely voluntarily, Jen. Don't feel afraid to play with me, use me, even pop me if that's where someone's tastes in entertainment might lead.

He held back from revealing his personal reasons for why he'd done this, keeping to fairly public (for most in his world) knowledge about the wizards and their traditions. He had no idea how he might have gotten this across if neither of them had had the ways of the mysteries of the mind. He guessed, though his mind flinched from the very idea, that he was fortunate enough to have this as part of what Vòrin Scord meant by his being a major protagonist, though having such an interpreter lessened some of the impact of his restrictions as Bozon.

-----------------

He listened, and gleefully jumped at the idea of being of negative weight for the night. Though his mental image of it was more of being round as a ball against the ceiling than of his usual muscular self trapped being up there.

Jen relays the information, and Tine responds, "But wouldn't popping you kill you?"


At this thought, Bozon hears the feint sound of cackling.


The staff fills Bozon with Helium and "Out of gratitude to your patron's patronage of our services," gives him free Gas Xchange (dynamically weighted gloves & boots) with 3 gas types: 333OG, regular air, and Helium. The gas exchanger will exchange all of the gas in him with whichever other gas he selects. It takes different times to recharge by collecting the target gasses from the ambient gasses available. As the gloves and boots are made from a Void Magem filament fabric, their weight can be altered from -2KG to +5KG

Gas Xchange {He Air OG} dynamically weighted gloves & boots
   -exchange gas for selected alternate. Air recharges 1 hour, He recharges 1 day, OG recharges 1 week
   -rotate dial to alter weight of gloves and boots from -2KG to +5KG

After an extremely refreshing night's sleep for Tine and Jen, they wake the next morning and have breakfast brought to the room. After settling the bill, they leave via the main Portal room of the Scuttlebus and return to Nexus. From there, it is a short ride in a Beetle Cab (giant beetle carapace used as the shell for a steam-powered mechanical beetle-legged vehicle) to Anima's giant Comowe Portal. They show their tickets to a Comowe representative who hands them each a pair of glasses. Wearing the glasses, they see a path outlined in glowing green arrows on the environment around them. They follow the arrows to a Comowe Portal room, and showing their tickets to a clockwork robot with a screen for its face, it directs them to a certain portal which they go through.

The group comes out in a room the size of an Opera theatre, with the wall and ceiling being one large curved window, open to a view of a blue and green planet in the distance, and a galactic swirl filling the view. A number of ships are moving through space around the view outside between the planet and near the ship they're on.

A uniformed attendant greets them and presses a button on his sleeve. A holographic image of the room they're in appears in the space around them. The attendant says, "Welcome to the Comowe Welcome Class Spaceship, the Icebreaker. You are on the Portal deck and welcome center of the Icebreaker, and this..." the view zooms out to an ovoid shape, which is about 50x as big as this room, with a tube extending beyond the view, "is section 2 of our ship..." and the 3D hologram image zooms out again to take in the shape of 4 ovoids joined by thin tubes in a tetrahedral shape with the 'front' ovoid being 3x as big as the other 3 sections. This room is on the middle of one of the smaller rear ovoids. "which is what you are looking at now. We will be leaving this space-station..." The view zooms out again to reveal a space-station about 100x as big as this ship in orbit around the planet below. "and traveling to this nebula..." the view zooms out again and again and a dotted line leads from the planet below to a nebula about 40 lightyears away "in about 3 hours. You are welcome to begin your spacewalk anytime you like over the next week while you enjoy our complimentary amenities at your leisure. The ship has an onboard AI and anytime you address the Icebreaker, it will respond. For example, hello Icebreaker!"

A holographic image of a woman wearing a uniform appears and says, "Hi crewmate! And welcome aboard, guests! Let me know if you would like to see our travel plans over the next week that you may be staying with us, or if I can direct you to any of our amenities."

He nodded slowly in sad agreement. "Bozon." It brought back bitter memories, things which at the time had been very happy but now that he knew more his ethics and morals saw them in a different light. Hergot had never had the warrior urges that were crucial to the devout of
shining Væran Ro'sènnpâdr, but like Grarsa he clove to the goodly values of the Celestial Knight of White Virtue, if not as strongly as his lamented friend and knight had.



Eh? What was that? It took a few seconds of frantic thought to remember what he'd been told about taboos, and the signs of one being broken. Um. He'd need to be more careful about expressing himself, and keep the rules in mind better even when they made something unduly difficult to express. They were there for reasons, even if he didn't fully comprehend all of them.





Bozon had a fun night on the ceiling, and then more at breakfast trying to jump "up" (down) enough to snatch tidbits before he floated back up again. Playing around a bit with the gloves and boots, getting a feel for how to use them to change his weight while still full of helium, led to some deep thought over what kind of enchantments they bore. He tried his Enchantmentsensing cantrip on them to see what bit if it might tell him, if anything.


-------------

Keeping the boots and gloves set to the most weight they'd give him without changing what he was inflated with (still helium, though he'd come to realize that he was somewhat drunk on it), Bozon faithfully accompanied his Elf friends along the way, taking in the remarkable new sights and experiences.

He didn't know what he was seeing with the planet below them, only recognizing that the station and ships were artificial, made things. He thought that the planet and the galactic spiral were quite beautiful, seeing them as works of art. Seeing stars against the blackness of space did not register to him. The skies of his world had moons, The Day Sun, the Night Sun, and the various planets, but no visible stars. For their star system hung alone in the Void, ensnared in the vast dimensional energies of the workings of beings far beyond their comprehension, a speck of unwary dust caught in the wards as they were laid.

He paid attention to the crewperson and to the hologram and what they said, even if most of it made no sense to him.

01:35, Today: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 181 using 50d6.  Enchantmentsensing cantrip.
For a brief moment, Bozon knows absolutely everything about the gloves - exactly what they're made of, where they're from, who made them, why they were made, and even their specific subatomic structure. Unfortunately, that was more information than his mind could contain, and after blacking out for a moment he remembered as much of the following as he would understand or could guess at.


Tine says, "Can we go outside now?"

The Icebreaker AI hologram responds, "Absolutely! We will be travelling via Portal Projector, so there is no momentum shift for anyone inside a 500m radius of the outer edge of my hull. You will be wearing AAFT spacesuits, so you will be perfectly safe from the void while barely noticing the translucent protective layer around you. You can obtain spacesuits in the antechamber of any airlock, such as that one over there." Icebreaker points to an airlock a few meters away. A small pale man in a tie-dyed business suit carrying a strange staff walks through a doorway which appears to have a bubble membrane covering it, but the membrane doesn't burst. He then jumps off a platform into the void of space.

Tine and Jen excitedly run over to the doorway, and Tine let's Jen go through first, then he goes, and they wait for Bozon to join them before jumping off of the platform into the void of space.

In reply to Narrator (msg # 61):

A dazed burstbarian eyed one glove ruefully after he regained consciousness. He understood cotton, wire, knitting, and that the enchantments generated two different forces. He had no problems with grasping that the gasses supplied were absorbed from his surroundings over time and stored, unlike the more complex concepts.

Deep inside of him, in the human self beneath his enchanted state, the faintest trace of Amài'ish stirred ever so slightly in response to the flood of super-detailed sub-atomic information that had struck his mind. But Hergot did not have sufficient Khùl-Algrenàthi'i-Atailh ancestry for the process of Amài'ish-Métschài to begin unaided, nor was the true life-or-death struggle essential to sparking that potential transcendence present. And so, 'the power which comes when it must' subsided back into nothingness within him.

----------------

Careful not to lose his carpetbag, Bozon joined them, stepping through the bubble-like membrane. His limited understanding of what Icebreaker had said boiled down to that there was a protective spell of some kind around them during this 'spacewalk.'

Now would be a good time to roll for advances on your cliches. I highly recommend at least levelling up once. I can walk you through it if you like. Otherwise, the instructions are in the procedures thread (first post).

In reply to Narrator (msg # 63):

OOC: Walk me through it. I'd been thinking of trying to advance Burstbarian Apprentice Conjuror anyway, since I've been focusing so much on that side of him for humor.

You currently have
***Figurehead King (5/5)
****Neurodiverse Father (4/4)
*****Burstbarian Apprentice Conjuror [24/2]

So for BAC you spend one * to roll 2D6 the number of die of your level
If both numbers are even, you advance
If one is odd, you can reroll that one by spending another *
Once you've advanced, you can continue repeating the procedure as long as you have *s to spend

In reply to Narrator (msg # 65):

OOC:
Spent 1 "*" and got
06:37, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 7 using 2d6, unique dice ((4,3)).

Spend a second "*" to re-roll the 3 and got
06:40, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 6 using 1d6, unique dice ((6)).

which gives me a 4 and a 6 with 3 stars left on that cliché?

That's right. Now you currently have
***Figurehead King (5/5)
****Neurodiverse Father (4/4)
***Burstbarian Apprentice Conjuror [24/3]

In reply to Narrator (msg # 67):

OOC:
07:37, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 9 using 3d6, unique dice with rolls of 3,2,4.  Advancement, Burstbarian 3 to 4.
07:37, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 6 using 1d6, unique dice with rolls of 6.  Advancement re-roll, Burstbarian 3 to 4.

That would give me 4th level in the cliché, and 1 star left, if my math is right?

And for Neurodiverse Father...
07:39, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 18 using 4d6, unique dice with rolls of 3,5,6,4.  Advancement, Father 4 to 5.
07:40, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 8 using 2d6, unique dice with rolls of 2,6.  Advancement re-roll 2 dice, Father 4 to 5.

That would be level 5 in the cliché, with 1 star left over?

And back to IC, since I'm not advancing King yet...

Once Bozon's foot leaves the floor of the exit door, he begins floating in zero-gee just like when he's in Portals space ((I've not mentioned it before, be the space between the entrance and exit of a Portal is zero-gee and wraps in on itself around the sides such that one sees a distorted image of themselves around the edges - as if in a mirror tube)) but instead of a distorted image of himself, he sees the distant galaxy, the very few other stars, the space station they're docked to and about 1000 other tourists free-floating in the area around the spaceship.

Tine and Jen zoom toward Bozon and each grab a hand as they laugh ((he can hear them)), spinning him in a circle. Whichever way Bozon tries to move, he moves intuitively.

The membrane spacesuit they are all wearing is an invention of Patrus Cosmodomini of the AAFT company. It comes installed with communicators and intuitive vector thrusters to make movement in zero-gee practically effortless.

There are people playing a game with weighted beach balls being passed back and forth nearby. One of the balls drifts over to the three of them and a nearby tourist says, "Oh hey, could you guys pass that back, please?"

This was an interesting.... whoa! Thoughts went everywhere as Bozon was thrown into a spin by the playful kids. Somehow, he managed to end up upside down relative to them, still spinning for a bit until he learned to cope a bit better.

Ball? Ball! He remembered Tine's early command to behave like a dog, and decided to react that way to it. The big clown tried to bound after the ball on all fours, 'barking' his name several times as he went. Catching up to the ball, he tackled it, wrapping both arms and legs around it briefly before looking around in obfuscating stupidity as he used the intuitive movement of the membrane suit/spell to head back towards the tourist who'd spoken up, pretending that the ball was carrying the barbarian with it.

Tine and Jen joined Bozon, and the tourists took the ball. The tourists were a young woman and a young troll with blue skin and Magem crystals embedded throughout his body gratefully greet Bozon. The young woman says, "Thank you, friends! My companion here is Djordan, and my name is Auricle, who are you three?"

Jen says, "Hi Auricle and Djordan! I'm Jen."
Still laughing at Bozon's antics, Tine adds, "And I'm Tine!"

"Bozon!" Bozon barked, still playing 'dog' after letting go of the ball. He bounded around the little group on all fours, mock-panting with a big grin.

Auricle laughs at Bozon's dog act and claps. She says, "Greetings, Bozon, Tine and Jen! We're here on holiday, enjoying the sights of the Comowe culture. Want to join our game of Spaceball? It's like Quidditch, but without gravity."

Djordan's crystals light up and he blows glowing dust over the three of them. "There, your Comowe spacesuits are designed for leisure, but I've enhanced them to be competitively faster."

Tine's excitement keeps mounting and he gleefully agrees to join in. Jen wants to hang back for a few rounds and watch before joining in to get a feel for the gameplay.

What is Quidditch? Bozon wondered. He stayed back with Jen to watch and perhaps learn the game. Also, to deal with the inner oddness of Lucky Charms and suddenly ingested knowledge of these two they had just met... Aura of Doom? Crystals? Jewel-bird people? It was too much, too fast, and gave him a headache.

OOC: Do a magic perception check roll for Bozon noticing his mind being read. I'll roll for Jen.

Jen stares at the game intently.

After an hour of watching and distracted thinking, the concept and goals of the game suddenly become apparent to both Jen and Bozon. Jen asks Bozon, "Wanna make a go at the game?"

In reply to Narrator (msg # 75):

The big clown made a round-mouthed expression of surprise, then answered Jen with a broad grin and several affirmative nods expressing an eagerness to play.

He was a toy. Play, play, play, play!


OOC: 21:11, Today: Bozon the Burstbarian rolled 16 using 4d6 ((4,3,4,5)).
That was rolling Burstbarian Apprentice Conjuror for the mind reading check; I wasn't sure what I was supposed to use so went with his lowest cliché.

GM's EDIT: Bozon is able to tell that Jen listened to some of his thoughts, but he doesn't know what she heard.
This message was last edited by the GM at 05:20, Tue 25 Feb 2020.

The 5 of them all join the same team. Djordan plays as seeker, and about 40 minutes in, he captures the snitch. The other team plays hard, and when one of the other team is about to hit a ball at Tine, Bozon manages to intercept the ball with his groin, making hilariously exaggerated gestures and causing the other team to get distracted laughing long enough for Jen to score another point through their goal-ring.

Most of the way through the game, the ship undocks and starts moving. At first a few people panic, until they realize that they're all being kept in the same relative position to the ship as when they were stationary. It's as if they're all being pulled along by the ship. Everyone agrees to pause the game while they all watch the planet and it's sun shrink to nothingness.

Suddenly Tine, Jen and Bozon start to drift toward the back of the ship while everyone else remains stationary. Auricle and Djordan notice and ask what's happening, but Tine and Jen have no idea.

Bozon didn't/doesn't mind Jen listening in on her own. He has no idea what, beyond his own past, he should be keeping from her. And since he seems to be 'okay' in that otherworld backstage, he reasons that Yafla is as well. Hopefully. The idea of keeping backstage a secret from the Elf kids never even crosses his mind. It's confusing enough for him to try to grasp.


Bozon freaks out when he realizes that he and the kids are inexplicably drifting relative to the ship unlike anyone else. The big clown tries to grab hold of both Tine and Jen and make for the entrance back onto the ship with them, if he can do so. If some safeguard here isn't working right for them, he was not going to let the children be endangered by that failure if he could help it.

It is absolutely hopeless for Bozon to reach the ship in time, though he and Tine and Jen are all trying as hard as they can. Auricle and Djordan have spacesuits that are different from everyone else's, and they are significantly faster, but even they can't catch up to Tine, Jen and Bozon before they all reach the boarder of the safe-zone of the ship. They all grab onto eachother, and tethers shoot out from Auricle to wrap around the group just as the 3 cross the boarder. The ship is moving at an unimaginably fast speed, and the moment they are beyond the safe zone, the ship is out of sight.

The only reason they aren't torn to shreds by changes in momentum is that the ship isn't actually moving at all, but projecting its existence into this Oner via a complicated Portal mechanism.

They are completely stranded in the middle of nothingness with no nearby stars or planets.

Just then an image of a planet exploding appears filling the sky, it seems to be everywhere at once and visible in every direction. As quickly as it appears, it is gone.

Hergot clung to both children to avoid risking losing them. He had no idea where they were, what kind of dangers or foodstuffs were nearby, and the sudden illusion of something exploding suggested to him that they were supposed to learn something from this experience. What, he did not know, but it felt a bit like the kinds of fabricated events that guides led tourist parties into back home. And here, he was a tourist.

Hmm.

This might be the tragedy that Vòrin Scord had hinted was coming? If so, don't lose hope, he reminded himself. Mind the safety and needs of the children first.

He concentrated, trying to light up his nose to give them some small illumination to use.

Suddenly another spaceship approaches from beneath them, stopping about 500 meters away and a beam of green light encircles the group of 4, freezing them all in place and pulling them into a bay door with people standing just inside. The beam splits into 5 parts, separating the members of the group and holds them a few feet off the floor.

Bozon recognizes the man standing with his arms crossed as the Pirate King. "Well well well, I went fishing for 3 guppies and I picked up 5 fish instead! What luck! Captain, do you have two extra holding pens for these other two?"

A sharply dressed man all in black responds, "Of course, Tom! Lieutenant Warph, if you please?"

A man with an oddly shaped head presses a button and two open faced tubes descend from holes in the ceiling, setting down next to 3 other identical ones already on the ground. Each member of the group of 5 is placed in one of the tubes and the green immobilizing light switches from an external source to one within the tube.

Tom the Pirate King stands in front of Bozon and says, "You didn't think I'd let my favourite toy ever leave that easily, did you? You made me laugh harder and longer than I ever thought possible! But alas, someone wealthier than I had a standing request for the best entertainment, and I do believe you will qualify! You should be proud, boy, you're going to make me richer than I ever imagined! I sent a photocube video of your performance, and you've been purchased for the handsome sum of $13 quadrillion! I could break the economy of the whole multiverse! Captain, take us to home port."

"Of course. Navigation?"

A group of 13 robes figures with human skull mounted staves touch the tips of their staves together and the ship is suddenly sitting on the surface of some planet. A forest is visible outside of the dock. Tom holds his hand out, and one of the black robed mages hands him a small bag. He extracts a marble sized Magem crystal and looks at it through a lens, whistling. He salutes the Captain and begins to walk out of the room.

The light in Bozon's tube turns blue and Bozon can suddenly move.

OOC: the blue light will prevent the use of any magics, and will stay with Bozon wherever he goes (for now).
This message was last edited by the GM at 02:09, Sat 29 Feb 2020.

OOC: I'd mis-read originally and hadn't realized that Auricle and Djordan are with us as well. Whoops.

This sudden change of situation was disorienting. Magics like none he knew of by story or by experience were going on here. A light that paralyzed, yes, but being found by another ship so quickly, no. Unless it was as he'd thought a few moments ago, a planned-out scenario for the tourists. Hmm. That seemed more likely than Tom just happening across them so serendipitously.

Frozen in place, all he could do was watch, listen, and think until the light changed color and let him move.

Still full of helium, he started to drift upward with the gloves and boots neutralized. Hands pressed against the clear tube like a mime with an invisible wall, but unwittingly pushed himself away from that side in doing so. Remembering floating back in the hotel room, Bozon tried to brace his feet against one side of the tube and hands against the other.

Short post to clarify

more like these tubes, where when the light changes to blue, gravity kicks in
edit: and you can leave the tube, but the light will follow. To be clear, the Captain is giving you the chance to kill Tom. The Captain has no love for Tom whatsoever. Also, a pale man in a tye dyed suit, carrying a staff with multicoloured gems appears next to the Captain for a moment, floats up to the Captain's ear and whispers something darting his eyes at Bozon and his carpet bag from time to time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1jLo3y9HWI
This message was last edited by the GM at 04:10, Sat 29 Feb 2020.

In reply to Narrator (msg # 83):

OOC: Helium works by density, not by gravity. Since I was floating in normal air and normal gravity previously... it stands to reason the same physics would apply here?

Yes, just trying to clarify mainly that you can leave the tube.

Bozon thought that the fellow who spoke to the Captain looked familiar. Hadn't he been aboard their ship? He thought so. Hmm.

He caught the glances his way, and noticed the slight difference in angle as if more than one thing was being looked at. Letting go of the glass (or plastic), he floated up, trying to get out of the tube, keeping an eye on those darting eyes without being too obvious about it. Trying to figure out what was going on.

And, unaware of the magic-inhibiting effect of the blue light, he mentally reached for his Bounty of the Hidden Arts cantrip, thinking that tossing a pie at Tom's retreating person might be a suitable retort for his behavior. After all, it had grown enormously thrown at Mr. Stick, and if he shoved as much mana as he could manage into the spell maybe it would make an impression.

And he was right, too.
The little man disappears. Bozon is fairly certain that he's a Leprechaun.

The cantrip doesn't work, but Bozon does feel that he was drained a little from the effort. The Captain laughs. "Come, you're to be escorted to his highness. I think it's time for you to meet the King, and for us to return to work... Guards, escort the prisoners to their new master."

A group of 5 women of varying body types dressed in yellow jumpsuits with wicked katanas at their sides suddenly emerge out of the flat shadows into the room. They snapped their fingers and green lights from the holding cells all attached to rings on their fingers. The guards placed each floating prisoner in front of them as they went out into a lush garden. The moment they exited the ship, the women began growing in height until they ranged from the shortest guard at 8' to the tallest at 25'. They travelled for a time that seemed like a million years but was over in a moment, and entered into a massive sapphire castle built to accommodate people of up to 130' in height. There was a massive throne at the opposite end of the castle beyond a few walls. On the throne sat a ninety foot tall ancient Sangwen Djin, with a great frown on his face. Behind the throne was a pile of metal boulders, crystals, weapons and mana stones.

The group was lead into the presence of this great lord of darkness who adorned himself with chords of skulls of sentient peoples encircling his neck and draping down to his navel. The beast spoke in a booming voice that was never too loud but always foremost, "So, I hear you are entertainer. I have been bored for nearly 130,000 years. Make me laugh and you will all go free. You are a diversion for me."

The guard escorting Bozon turns off the light from her ring completely.

EDIT: There are all sorts of courtesans, of all heights and shapes. Some were even translucent. The amount of power that each person exuded reminded King Hergot of the most regal people he had ever met.

EDIT2: A few things I need to understand.
What would happen to Hergot if Bozon is popped?
Can Bozon perform a cantrip that would use up all his mana and kill him?
What happens if Bozon breaks his promise not to speak - is it even possible on his own, or would it require outside influence?
Do you need more information before you respond?
This message was last edited by the GM at 19:33, Mon 02 Mar 2020.

In reply to Narrator (msg # 87):

OOC Replies:

quote:

What would happen to Hergot if Bozon is popped?

It would be extremely unpleasant for him, pain-wise, but there is around a 48 to 72 hour window after you're popped during which the apprentice can be rescued to avoid really dying (with the lone exception of his popping being used to fuel someone elses' spell which could consume his soul to provide the needed power). If put back together in time, he'll be weak and disoriented for a while, recovering from that normally. But he'll have to (for medical and spiritual health reasons) stay the balloon buffoon for many extra months/years afterwards, with his taboos tied more closely to his health than before (thus, breaking a taboo delays or complicates healing for someone recovering from being burst).

And, as stated in his background, Hergot is completely unaware that such a rescue is possible, operating under the mistaken belief that everyone he popped really died at his hands when the reverse is true and none of his victims permanently perished from what he did.

quote:

Can Bozon perform a cantrip that would use up all his mana and kill him?

He could certainly use up all of his mana, but that's not fatal to him. Total mana loss (dissipating it but not preventing building up more) is a common result of taboo-breaking, and as such a teaching tool for apprentices in training to stay within the rules and restrictions of their Brotherhood or Temple.

quote:

What happens if Bozon breaks his promise not to speak - is it even possible on his own, or would it require outside influence?

That's not just a promise. It's a physical limitation built into his altered/enchanted state. So, not possible on his own; he can only speak in the limited set of words programmed into him. Of which his name "Bozon" is the only one that won't expend mana to say. It's quite possible for someone whose magic is from another kind to make it possible for him to speak, but I daresay that Hergot wouldn't take kindly to that being done to him without a lot of thought and consideration beforehand.

quote:

Do you need more information before you respond?

Unsure. It's more of writer's sphere at my end, complicated by offline life.
This message was last edited by the player at 01:03, Wed 04 Mar 2020.

Before Bozon begins, a man wearing various artifacts and dressed largely in black is escorted into the room by a black winged man. The black winged man raises his voice to be heard, "Greetings, most excellent one. This is Lugosi, the human responsible for the destruction of Gamma."

The Djin on the throne responded, "Thank you, Agarator. Lugosi, I believe my master would like to speak with you." He smirks and looks upward as he sing-songly says, "Ooooh Portal Waif, come hither..."

The Leprechaun in the tie-dyed suit with the multicoloured gems on his staff suddenly appears at eye level to the Djin and indignantly speaks in a booming voice far deeper and richer than James Earl Jones, "King Joe, I'm not wasting a wish to keep you from using that stupid name. But you aren't being a good Stuart King in my absence."

The Sangwen Djin frowns as he responds, "Very well, Emperor Pontorna." Gesturing to Lugosi, he relays the information.

Pontorna asks Lugosi, "What happened?"

Lugosi reports, "As you requested, I infiltrated Anima's ranks and was on the ship that found Gamma, just as you'd predicted I would. Once there, I proceed to execute the plan, planting the idea to use the Ragnarok Protocols in the Elf's mind. I concluded by setting the Planetary Portal shield to trap the planet in a Portal set to exit everywhere in the current multi-oner. I then used my jumper bracelet to escape to Agarator's floating island and was brought to you from there. Absolutely everything went according to your plan, my Emperor."

Pontorna appeared in front of Lugosi, "Well done, good and faithful servant. Now you may have the desires of your heart. Place your hand on my staff." He does. "Repeat after me: After I wish one wish, I will return this staff or I will be kept alive and tortured to the fullest extent of the King Joe's power as long as he lives."

The skulls on Joe's necklace glow red and suddenly hundreds of bodies fall from holes in the ceiling, with chains around them. Their heads look fluid and sloshy - as if their skulls have been removed. They are all screaming in agonizing torment, each of them burning in a flame but not dying. Lugosi repeats the phrase and his head glows red for a moment before the bodies ascend back into their holes and the holes close over, blocking out the cries. Pontorna let's go of his staff, and Lugosi holds it with greed and ecstasy.

Lugosi holds the staff aloft in triumph and says, "I wish to have and keep a bag of infinite storage from which I can retrieve and use any extremely powerful Magus artifact according to my needs and desires at the time."

King Joe opens his hand and places a neon green fanny pack before Lugosi. Lugosi takes the fannypack and hands the staff back to Emperor Pontorna.

Pontorna concludes, "When we have further need of your services, you will be called upon. Goodbye." Addressing Joe, "Ensure the next phase of the plan. I'm off to interfere here and there." And he disappears.

King Joe looks bored, and turns back to Bozon. "Well? Where's my entertainment, clown?"

Aghast at what he saw Lugosi threatened with, Bozon set his jaw and got to work trying to be funny in hopes of keeping the children safe from any such awful fate as that.

Turning up his weight to as far as the gloves could go (without exchanging gasses - he's still full of helium), he reached into his carpetbag and pulled out a random... battleaxe made of denim cloth, no starch or reinforcements to keep it from being exceedingly floppy. hmm? A weapon, now what to fight?

He reached in again, not looking, but thinking of small, soft, harmless objects. He pulled something out and set to work trying to fight it as if it were a dreadful monster. Overacting his barbarian aspect, Bozon soundlessly 'raged' against the... ordinary raspberry sitting inanimately on the floor. Trying his comical best, he managed to lose to it, the victorious fruit perched unharmed on the defeated barbarian clown's chest at the end of the skit.

A number of the people in the courtroom laughed at Bozon's shenanigans, but the Sangwen Djin only rolled his eyes in tired disgust, "I've seen better a hundred thousand times before. Let me help motivate you. I can tell that the two children are closest to you, especially since I expected them as part of the package to get you. But I don't know these other two... Auricle and Djordan. Oh! I see they've met one of my brothers. I wondered who was responsible for that droll Age of Agony. Choose between these two - Djordan, the nice young man you don't really know, or Auricle who was responsible for an Age in which every sentient being in the MultiOner became her pain-slave, and she became an unstoppable torture kingdom, whose sole currency was pain and suffering. If you don't choose, I'll choose for you. Someone pump him up a little more."

The light on Auricle's cage goes out, and she bursts into Magem powered flames, flying toward the exit. King Joe points a finger at her and the flames go out and she crashes to the ground, breaking bones in her hands and a foot. She looks into Bozon's eyes and speaks into his mind through her communicator, Bozon, PLEASE CHOOSE ME!!! You HAVE to trust on this. I can't explain. Please trust!

Just then, a 50' long 2 legged, 2 arm/winged Dragon flies in through a hole in the ceiling, landing a few feet from the Djin. He speaks directly into the minds of all in the surrounding area, "Joe, my Queen greets you through me. I carry her avatar."

The Dragon opens her mouth, and a woman falls from her throat to the floor, landing on her two feet and looking perfectly well made up in business formal wear, standing 7' tall and not a sign of any fluid on her at all. Clearly treating Joe like an equal or lesser, she says aloud, "Joe, I am happy to report that the entire MultiOner is completely infested with Rulab, and the Malemagus Mages have Balur beaten down to no single Balur-mind-node larger than a moon. Within the hour, that will be diminished to chunks the size of a breadbasket, with the sole exception of the negotiation node in your possession. Soon, the impudent Balur will taste the wrath of the Dragons. No one harms us and escapes unscathed. This avatar is to remain here to observe proceedings with your consent."

King Joe nods his head, "I consent."

The 50' Dragon curls up on the floor and hides its head under its wing to take a nap.

The avatar stands beside the Dragon and waits, arms folded on her chest.

Bozon gets pumped up a little more by one of the courtiers. The Djin looks expectantly at Bozon, "Well? Try again, slave!"

Normally, the greater pressure trying to stretch his rubber skin would have been both carrot and stick. Hergot/Bozon thought that he would have been thrilled being pumped up larger, but given the circumstances it wasn't just himself facing discomfort, suffering, and risk...

Auricle's mind-call and Aflae's backstage cry both goaded him to mentally choose the lady. But whether it was choosing her to be spared or to suffer worse, he had no idea. King Joe's choice of wording had not indicated, to his social perceptions, what the consequences for the person being chosen would be.

He pantomimed, trying to indicate his choice through non-verbal means.

But when addressed as "slave," even the regality of the great Djin and his court did not keep the barbarian from glaring at Joe. He repeated an earlier pantomime that Tine and Jen had seen, using his fingers to describe a collar around his neck, and a leash held out... towards Tine. I'm his jester. Not yours, purchaser of stolen goods. This boy is my real master's son, Hergot thought strongly, heedless of whether he was risking breaking taboo or not for the moment in his anger.

Nonetheless, he pulled another pair of random items from the carpetbag and set to work trying to amuse the court with these props, and perhaps their monarch if he was lucky.
This message was last edited by the player at 19:08, Tue 10 Mar 2020.

Sometimes a bully orchestrates circumstances so that their victim has to chose their own pain, in an attempt to trick them into believing they are completely at fault. But what fault can be found in the person who chooses without knowing what they choose? Two options were presented, but what if Joe's choice had been both? Who can say what was right, but at least Auricle's will was carried out.

She smiled as it became clear Bozon had chosen her. She grabbed her wrists and curled up as a white-hot bolt of plasma shot at her from Joe. She seemed to vaporize, but King Joe's face flashed the micro-expressions of someone concerned for just a moment.


Joe responds out loud, "Hmph! Well! You have gall, boychild."

Immediately, he signalled and the lights came on paralyzing Bozon as a delegation of creatures wearing a variety of utterly alien clothing entered. "Your Highness, the daily status update is at your disposal."

"Proceed."

The group went on to talk about the fiscal, public health and general kingdom welfare as well as the status of the colonies. The kingdom's population was no less than 80 billion, and was peacefully expanding every day. Once the report was finished and Joe asked questions and made delegations, the group left and the paralyzation lights went off.

Joe looked at Bozon and heartlessly said, "Pick the next one to die or I kill the other girl next."

This time. This time it not been limited to two choices. He could choose Joe himself, or Portorna, or the dragon queen's representative... but no. Those would all be the wrong thing to do. Great Væran Ro'sènnpâdr would probably not approve.

Though he would have preferred to face death by overinflation the same as his own jesters/victims had, and at the hands of someone of the Elf court that had really purchased him, there was only one noble, honorable path he could see. And that was to choose himself. He could not see any way to utilize either Azraile's nor Sooth's advice in doing it at the moment though, nor did he have the time to try to work something up.

Maybe, just maybe, he could use the pain of being executed for something good, though? Cursehealing was a spell that Enja-Osdeon had. Scord had mentioned something about Joe and his kin being under an ancient curse. He had no idea of the details, or how to go about seeking to break it from his laughably weak cantrip version of the spell, but he was going to give it a try.

He indicated his own chest with a thumb, looking up at Joe's eyes seriously as one king to another. He was offering up his own life as his choice. Asking to be hurt worse than anything that he could possibly imagine.
This message was last edited by the player at 02:53, Mon 16 Mar 2020.

Joe stared carefully for a moment, then, "You wish to die in their stead? That is certainly the noble thing to do, and your interpretation of my wishes would leave some Djin envious of your cunning. But that was not the intention of my wish, and I am the Djin, not you. So try again. Choose between the two boys or the girl. If you fail to make me laugh, I will kill that one you choose, or my own choice if you do not choose."

A large box on wheels is rolled into the court. Joe remarks, "Ah, the Balur negotiator is here. We'll wait for the Emperor to return before we begin negotiations."

Bozon tried to look as sad and woebegone as he could, looking over his three paralyzed companions. I am greatly sorry, Djordan, but I must protect Tine above all others. Even myself. And Jen is his beloved friend.

His choice made, that Djordan's life was at stake here, he said "Bozon," quietly as he reached into the carpetbag and withdrew... the VI projector, which he set down and turned on so that he would have two different Joes try to get laughs from.

He mulled over his situation as he got out props to begin another attempt at entertaining with. He'd set aside his crown, his throne, and his kingdom - not that Havony was any way close to the great kingdoms of this world or worlds - for this ordeal and penance. And he was being forced into something that he would never, ever have asked of one of his own jesters. Being forced to weigh the lives of third parties and struggle to save them like he was some benighted hero, not the commoner buffoon and servant he had thought his life as Bozon would be.

He recalled that Young Joe had asked for a sweet cake backstage, so he tried to make a barbarian baking a cake into the act.

01:01, Today: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 834 using 63d24.  non-sacrificially Enhanced Performance.

Djordon's cage lights went out, and he took a deep breath. He looked at Bozon and said, "It's okay friend. I've lived a long life, and I do not fear death."

01:04, Today: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 13 using 5d6 with rolls of 3,4,1,4,1.  Neurodiverse.
01:05, Today: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 15 using 5d6 with rolls of 1,4,1,4,5.  But a king.

Although he had difficulty understanding social cues due to his neurodiversity, his training as a king had taught him to read people's micro-expressions, and Djordon was clearly more afraid than he had ever been before in his life. Bozon has a flash of a page from one of the books in The Chronicles of Synthia's Last Request, where Djordon personally witnessed Auricle torture countless people with the pain she herself was tormented by. She even tortured Balur itself in order to gain power. And the torture she used was very similar to what King Joe had in the ceiling above. Something told him the fear of death was mingling with the empathy for those in the ceiling.

King Joe looked at Djordon and said, "I've looked at her mind, boy, and your girl would do the same thing again."

Djordon's face flashed through deep pain, confusion and then denial at that comment.

King Joe asked for a report on the effects of the Rulabs on the general population, and he heard that most people were showing only mild signs of energy drainage.

When Bozon began performing, he was taken up by the spirit of the moment and everything he did was executed with perfect timing and extreme skill. This performance made his act in the Pirate Palace seem like amateur night in a backwoods tavern. Among other hilarity, Bozon mimed pulling out a far-too-small bowl from a cupboard, and a polkadot bowl flew out of his bag into his hands. Every item he mimed did the same thing as he combined sparkling confetti 'flour' with green slime 'eggs' and other zany ingredients, and poured gallons from the thimble-sized bowl into an oversized mixing bowl and stirred with all his might, spraying mock-ingredients over everything. VI Joe was already laughing hysterically, when Bozon had a bright idea and an inflatable boy climbed out of his bag.

The boy looked like a typical vampire trope, and VI Joe said, "It's my friend, Yavod!"

King Joe's eyebrows raised at this.

Inflatable Yavod was not sentient, so Bozon mime-asked Yavod to help bake the cake, and 'punished' him every time he messed up by inflating him a little more. The oven made of ice beeped and Yavod pulled out a 15' tall completely finished utterly beautiful cake from the 2" oven door. When Bozon saw the perfection of the cake, he got excited and hugged inflatable Yavod, popping Yavod and causing the cake to fall and splatter all over the place.

When young Joe tried some of the cake, laughing he said, "Wow! That's even worse than Hagrod's pig-mush!"

King Joe huffed a little in bemusement at young Joe's reference.

After the entire performance completed, King Joe said, "Well, it's not quite entertainment, but I'll let Djordon live for it. Guard, escort Djordon to the hospital to see that he won't suffer too much from the Rulabs, then put him back on his home-world." The guards complied at once. "Now, since you must protect Tine above all others, Jen is the next to die if you don't make me laugh."

Pontorna appeared before King Joe and said, "Joe, my slave, greet Balur and explain the situation. I'll be back soon, the perimeter is almost secured." The emperor disappeared again.

King Joe had the box containing Balur opened and said, "We know all about your troubles, Balur. We are the cause. We've finally figured it out and halted your ability to reset the world. The creature consuming you is known as Rulab, and it was your divergent's natural predator in a divergent Oner from your own. It is mindless and cannot be reasoned with. As you can tell, you are the most complex and intelligent node of Balur remaining, and you are at our mercy." With that, he pointed at Balur and it shrunk to the size of a mouse pellet, then pointed with a different finger and it grew back to a little bigger than its previous size. "So you know my power. You will do as we say, or we will end you. I represent an ever expanding empire of 80 billion people whom you've no power over. We can live quite happily without you. We will name our price and you will pay it. You have no other choice if you wish to survive. You will remain gagged until your Emperor arrives to tell you the terms of your surrender."

Then, turning to Bozon, he began, "Now, enterta-"

VI Joe yelled, "You big bully! Just because I hate who you've become, that doesn't give you the right to treat people like that!"

King Joe replies, "Young me, shut up. You know nothing of what has happened. Do you know that I am Sangwen? But Yavod didn't survive Changing you when you stupidly nearly killed yourself. Your mother was brutally murdered by the people she sacrificed her time with you to benevolently rule over. They replaced her with your uncle, and he ate the kingdom into poverty. You know nothing, and I have the right to rule as I see fit, so be seen and not heard, brat! BOZON! Make. Me. Laugh."

The clown... frowned.

And reached into his carpetbag, pulling out an armband made from Joe's very anchor within the Sideways.

I do not think so, King Joe. By the powers of Scord and Theophili, that which was once a staff still commands you, but not under Pontorna's will."

The clown who was the King of tiny, distant Havony held the armband in both inflated hands, and gazed defiantly up at Joe's face on his throne. Sparks of the fire of Azraile's sword flared where his fingers grasped it, the power of Enja-Osdeön over artifice and magic items flowing through the tormented, suffering apprentice to try and take command of that bond between Joe and his anchor.

At that moment, Emperor Pontorna arrived with his back to Bozon, "There, we're sealed off. I've time-separated us from the outside so that 1000 years here will be like a moment or a minute outside. Why do you look like that?" He snaps around instantly, staring at Bozon, "Who the FRAK let someone with holy flame into my castle?"

Joe said, "I did."

"Do you know what you've done, you IDIOT?"

"I do."

"SKAN you!"

Everyone in the room was staring at Bozon. Even the Dragon and the Dragon avatar were staring at him.

Joe said, "MeliKami, kill the Dragons!"

Suddenly the stairs and floor beneath the Dragon and avatar snap closed, smashing them both within. The floor, walls and boulders behind King Joe's throne begin to move and shift, forming a humanoid shape with the pieces floating and the whole thing standing on the ground. A rocky voice grinds out, "You finally noticed that the Dragon helped Auricle escape?"

King Joe replies, "I suspected it. I have my own Dragons dampening his power." ((no boost from Magus))

Pontorna says, "It better be enough."

King Joe calmly answers, "Even better. Bozon, return to your task to entertain me, and give up your wasteful rebellion or Tine will die."

EDIT:
OOC: You haven't commanded him to do anything yet.
This message was last edited by the GM at 04:40, Mon 30 Mar 2020.

I am not your slave or subject, Joe. I am King Hergot of Havony, third of that name, and though I may have set my crown, throne, and kingdom aside to serve as jester and entertainment to King Samhradh of the Elfs, even placing my own life in the hands of his court, I have never consented to being used to decide whether a third party would live or die. Particularly one of Samhradh's own royal sons.

Bozon's lips were moving soundlessly as he glared at both Joe and Pontorna. Forget the taboos and rules. What was going here was a complete violation of his personal ethics as well as a travesty of a proper court.

As far as you, Na, I wonder if your enslavement of Joe would hold should he restore Pon and Tor to life and their own selves? I would think that two against one would be in his freedom's favor, shattering a hated master so. Though making you deathly allergic to The Sideways now, and for all other incarnations you might have prior and hence, might be a suitable punishment too.

That the Emperor disliked Azraile's flame was not lost on Bozon, and he dumped every bit of mana he could scrape together from his suffering into that aspect of the armband's powers. Let it burn in whatever way Na feared most. For his part, he envisioned the purifying light of Vìrya Nanye, She Who Shines, as the exemplar of holiness in his own faith.

OOC: there are two possibilities here, depending on what Bozon's motivations are. I'll write them both out, so choose the one which is more true.

---

Spoiler for if Bozon is trusting the Creator or the Fates or the ultimate personal power to ensure the best outcome, even if the armband fails: (Highlight or hover over the text to view)
01:15, Today: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 108 using 14d16 with rolls of 4,10,14,8,12,15,7,12,3,5,5,4,3,6.  If trusting deity

The flame lights up more brightly, and Bozon gets the feeling that he should ask that the boy's life be spared. Bozon senses the bonds that tie the Djin to the staff in Pontorna's hand. He can see how intertwined they both are, as if the staff is part of the Djin's soul. Looking more closely, he sees that the staff isn't really a staff at all, but literally the Djin's physical body. The Djin's apparent body is a physically solid projection from the staff. He can't claim ownership of the Djin, but he can play the strings on the soul of the Djin to force it to do his will.

Pontorna smiles, and Bozon can sense his thoughts vibrating through the armband, saying, His heart isn't pure. He loves his homeland, and he is from an honour/shame culture. He will try to prove his worth by sacrificing his life to save the boy. I can use this...

Pontorna whirls his staff above his head and sends a fireball flying at Tine. In an instant, Bozon can see the inner workings of the spell - it has layers of complexity, but the outer layer is pure destruction on a vector. It would be easy enough to let the holy flame burn one thread away and cause the spell to reverse direction and consume the one who sent it.

---

---

Spoiler for if Bozon is trusting the combined power of himself and the others and the armband, to overpower and win: (Highlight or hover over the text to view)
01:16, Today: Narrator, on behalf of Bozon the Burstbarian, rolled 80 using 14d16 with rolls of 4,16,1,7,1,4,6,1,13,2,2,2,12,9.  If trusting power.

The flame goes out, but Bozon can sense the bonds that tie the Djin to the staff in Pontorna's hand. He can see how intertwined they both are, as if the staff is part of the Djin's soul. Looking more closely, he sees that the staff isn't really a staff at all, but literally the Djin's physical body. The Djin's apparent body is a physically solid projection from the staff. He can't claim ownership of the Djin, but he can play the strings on the soul of the Djin to force it to do his will.

Pontorna whirls his staff above his head and sends a fireball flying at Tine. In an instant, Bozon can see the inner workings of the spell - it has layers of complexity, but the outer layer is pure destruction on a vector. It would be easy enough to sever one thread away and cause the spell to reverse direction and consume the one who sent it.

---

The flames burned more brightly. Bozon's trust was in the Gods above, not in his own feeble and untrained magic. And he still considered Scord, Een, and Theophili to be demigods of some degree or another, in accordance with how he perceived them in The Sideways. He didn't know what Azraile was, but if the flame she wielded was a holy one, than it seemed to him that using it in service to the wills of the divine was best.

Joe. It is my wish that you spare Tine and Jen's lives your malevolence, he thought hard, expressing his desire to the Djin.

And while his grasp of magic was tiny and uncertain, in the light of the holy fire he saw things about the staff Pontorna held that he would never have dreamed. And saw how to defend Tine from it should the Emperor use magic to attack, turning his blow back upon him by burning one parameter of the incoming spell.

OOC: The Rocto-CathSinnian pantheon actually does not have a single Creator or deity of creation, seeing the world as made by all of the gods to varying degrees working together. The Pavaric pantheon does have a Creator deity, Hnálla, but most of the others in the pantheon had hands in how the world(s) developed from his initial pattern.

When Bozon manipulates Pontorna's spell, the holy flame disappears, but the outer layer of the spell's complexity melts away, and after it flies toward Pontorna for a moment, it begins flying faster towards Tine.

Pontorna laughs, "Joe! He doesn't know how to use the holy flame!"

King Joe blinks twice, the relaxes and laughs. "Nothing to worry about, then."

Bozon can see the workings of the spell enough to know he can't stop it now. But he could get between the fireball and Tine. It looks likely that if it pops Bozon, it won't hurt Tine. He has enough time to mentally say one sentence as he moves.

Sad to have to throw away his life in such an unfunny fashion, almost feeling like it was a dishonorable death save that it was protecting the life of an innocent child, Hergot/Bozon dove into the path of the fireball to spare Tine that ghastly end. It made his whole purpose for becoming Bozon meaningless, in his mind.

King Joe freezes the fireball and Bozon in a momentum suspending zone (neither move even an inch, yet both will retain their current momentum once the field stops). Joe says, "As a good ruler, I have an obligation to remain true to my word. I offered freedom to the clown and his companions if he made me laugh. He made me laugh, so I am obliged to free him."

Pontorna replied, "I hate it when my wishes contradict my wishes. Very well, he has earned his freedom. But by trying to turn my fireball against me, he has attempted regicide. Even a free man who makes an attempt on my life must be punished by the very laws you drafted."

"Might I suggest he die by overinflation? If he makes it part of his act, it could be hilarious."

Pon can't resist a good laugh, so Pontorna finds himself drawn to this possibility. "I like the sound of that! Release him. But, Bozon, if you attempt to use that holy flame again, I will kill both of your companions."

Noticing VI Joe, Pontorna points and says, "What's the purpose of that?"

King Joe responds, "I believe it was meant to reason with me or entertain me. It mostly just annoyed me."

"You are boring Joe. Clown, if you make me laugh, I might decide to let you live. Lipsync for your life, clown!"

King Joe unfreezes Bozon, but leaves the fireball in the freezing field.

The Holy Flame remains accessable throughout this scene, but still responds in its own way, if at all.

Unbeknownst to him, due to Aflae's spell, overinflation won't kill him. Instead he'll end up completely in the Sideways.

When used properly, Holy flames are unstoppable.

OOC: I'm drifting off to sleep as I type so that's it for this post.