Dramatis Personae.   Posted by Archival.Group: 0
 GM, 3 posts
Tue 28 Jun 2016
at 09:04
Dramatis Personae
In this thread you'll find the ever-growing list of characters in Children of the Rain, sorted by affiliation.
 GM, 4 posts
Tue 28 Jun 2016
at 09:22
Dramatis Personae
Palmera High School Staff

Mr. Hoffman
Mr. Hoffman transferred in the year before and is still adjusting to a much smaller school than the inner-city Paradise high schools that he's used to. Mr. Hoffman is somewhat young for principal - still in his early forties - and sees himself as something of a 'people's principal'. He likes drop in to the cafeteria to eat his lunches, or sometimes just to grab breakfast before school, and is overall friendly and involved with student affairs at school. At the same time, the students would be forgiven for wondering exactly what he actually does around the school. Rarely do they ever encounter him in any working capacity, instead usually as a casual yet distant authority figure.

Mrs. Patricio and Mr. Baird
The two vice-principals of Palmera High are often thought of as some sort of joint-entity. There's always been a strange vibe about how in-sync their uptight personalities and professional demeanours are, as if they're both different-gendered clones of the same uber-authority figure. The VPs are generally the highest authorities students are likely to encounter. They're the ones who handle detentions, suspensions and other punishments - if a student is told to "Go to the office", a VP's office is no doubt what's being referred to.

Miss Brantford - Karen Brantford
Miss Brantford is a bit of an oddity around the school. She's usually alright with students, but seems constantly petrified around other adults, though very slightly less so around school staff. No one's quite sure exactly how she was hired - some claim that her personality shifted after being hired, while others are adamant that she had to have slept with someone to get her job (somehow despite her previously mentioned anthrophobia).

Mr. Deck - Lewis Deck
Math Teacher
Tall, relatively young, a bit awkward, and unarguably good-looking, Mr. Deck is what gets most of the female students going. Mr. Deck tends to be thought of as a bit distant and aloof by some of his colleagues, but most who know him know that he's just shy about approaching his coworkers in anything less than a professional capacity. On the other hand, somehow he's gotten himself a fiancée. Most assume he stumbled into it by accident.

Miss De Santiago - Rosa De Santiago
Phys Ed and Health Teacher
In her late twenties, Miss De Santiago was a former star athlete in high school who dreamed of a life as an Olympic competitor. Unfortunately, beyond high school, Miss De Santiago found that her skills couldn't quite push her far enough and didn't have much in the way of a fallback. So she decided to study the theory of the one thing she was good at. She tends to take a laid back, but caring, approach to her work, and is usually one of the friendlier people around to students and staff alike. Though it's no business of the students, among her colleagues she's known as one of the few openly gay staff members. She's also known as a bit of a partier and is usually one of the first to invite other staff members out for drinks. That, and her usual bungling of her relationships due to that very easy-going attitude.

Mr. Galiano - Henry Galiano
Government and Law Teacher
Mr. Galiano is, quite simply, a stunningly average man. Average looks, average intelligence, average wife and family, not much in the way of personality besides being a little stiff. The truth is, while he tries to be fun and get his students enthused about their studies, he's just out-of-touch enough to seem uninteresting and not quite out-of-touch enough to be too awkward. The result is, evidently, a presence that's ultimately memorable for how unmemorable he is.

Mr. Koehler - Alexander Koehler
Math Teacher
One of the oldest staff members at Palmera High, Mr. Koehler is known for two things. First, being unusually spry and fun for his age. Second, for looking vaguely like Albert Einstein. These two factors combined make him a favourite among the students. Among the staff, while some might find him a bit too laid-back in his old age, most refer to him as a valuable source of knowledge, experience and occasionally amusing anecdotes.

Mr. Kwan - Glenn Kwan
Tech Teacher
Mr. Kwan often describes himself as "just short of a walking stereotype", being a Chinese-American man who teaches programming and other computer-related classes. Lost somewhere in his mid-thirties, Mr. Kwan is generally described as one of the more fun teachers by students, and one of the more in-touch with current pop culture, fads and dank memes. On the other hand, he frequently comes under scrutiny by the higher-ups for letting his students goof around during class and often letting students (and some teachers) hang around in his class rooms and use the computers during free periods. Mr. Kwan is good friends with Miss De Santiago, and is usually the first to take up her offers for drinks. Or he was, until he very recently found himself a girlfriend.

Mrs. Lott - Genevieve Lott
History Teacher
A mother of two, Mrs. Lott is one of two history teachers the students are most likely to be saddled with. With long, wavy blonde hair that ends in light curls and a body that says anything but "I've had two kids", Mrs. Lott is the subject of no small amount of teenage boys' (and some girls' (and some teachers')) fantasies. While most of the time she's the picture of a caring, motherly woman, those who have been out at drinking with her - or attended some of the staff Christmas parties - would know that she tends to enjoy her drinks a bit too much, and tends to get rather boisterous and noisy with a few in her.

Miss McQuaid - Elsie McQuaid
Guidance Counsellor
Miss McQuaid is one of the student counsellors, but occasionally lends her services to staff members who need someone more qualified to talk to about their problems. Staff members who aren't Miss De Santiago or Olbright, that is. No one can explain why, but those two seem to have been on her shitlist from day one. It's not homophobia - Miss McQuaid is one of the Lesbi-Three (or maybe it is some kind of double reverse 360 nocloset homophobia) - it just seems to be something about their attitudes that rubs her the wrong way. Maybe it's because her and De Santiago, according to rumours, used to date and Miss Olbright is just too similar to her ex. Regardless, while it has yet to devolve into outright antagonism, the two get no shortage of stink-eyes where others get warm smiles and understanding.

Mr. Meraz - Jose Meraz
History Teacher
Mr. Meraz is one of those teachers. You know the type, every school has one. A creature of pure, limitless energy compressed into the body of a man. Mr. Meraz is always moving, always talking and always trying his damnedest to be the school's most fun and zany teacher. Gives all the students kooky nicknames, always volunteers to get a pie thrown in his face at pep rallies (even when that wasn't on the table beforehand), never seems to take a normal-ass picture. It works on the younger students at least, who are used to the distant authority figures of middle school and elementary school. The seniors and staff tend to think of him as some who tries way, way too hard to be liked, and possibly wasn't given enough attention growing up.

Mr. Parilla - Tim Parilla
Science Teacher
Mr. Parilla is one of those men who is impossible to age. He acts like he's in his early thirties, has a body like he's in his late forties, and has pure grey hair as if he should be somewhere in his fifties. Mr. Parilla has been described as something of a 'fat slob', but his students seem to love him. Known for putting on movies, leaving his students alone to talk on his cellphone, booking the school's laptops for his class, and... doing just about anything but teaching. While he's miraculously kept his job so far, the rumour mill around the staff room tells that an investigation into his 'teaching' practices isn't far off.

Miss Turner - Cassie Turner
English Teacher
A recent graduate in her early twenties, Miss Turner is teaching her own classes for the very first time this year. A bit on the naive side, Miss Turner prefers to teach the lower grades, as the seniors are a bit too close to her age and maturity level for comfort. However, her youth and kindness (and good looks) tends to make her a favourite among many students. A small few members of clubs supervised by Miss Turner have even gotten cozy enough to call her by her first name outside of school. This has led to at least one talk in which the principal has reminded her to keep a healthy distance between herself and the students.

Mr. Van Der Beek - Hank Van Der Beek
Science Teacher
Mr. Van Der Beek is subject to perhaps the widest variety of student rumours, owing to the perfect storm of an awkward personality, slightly slurred speech, hearing impairment and strange looks. Portly with big lips and enormous prescription glasses, Mr. Van Der Beek has been uncharitably described as having something of an 'Innsmouth Look' about him. Despite all of that, he's friendly with students and colleagues and unquestionably enthusiastic about his work.

Mrs. Wagner - Dorothy Wagner
Art Teacher
The head of the art department and the direct superior of a certain Miss Olbright, Mrs. Wagner is somewhere in her late fifties, a widow and a mother of one (currently majoring in Philosophy, god bless his soul). While Mrs. Wagner is friendly and relatively laid-back with her students, her attitude just serves as a thin veil behind which hides a woman who has just about given up. Between classes, she can usually be found smoking behind the school (and out of sight of any impressionable young minds), and always keeps a bottle of emergency whiskey in her desk to share with her close friends among the staff who might be having a bad day.

Miss Zanelli - Cheryl Zanelli
Math Teacher
Somewhere in her late forties, Miss Zanelli has garnered a reputation as a bit of a cougar for her good looks, often low-cut tops and, bluntly, her status as a divorcee. On the flip side, Miss Zanelli tends to be among the stricter of the teachers and Palmera High and has rarely, if ever, been described as anything approaching 'fun'. Lately, some have questioned her work ethic, as a handful of students have come forward claiming that she does little more than give her lessons and assign homework, and has little patience for any students who may be at risk of falling behind (god help them if they're actually failing).

This message was last edited by the GM at 05:46, Fri 09 Sept 2016.

 GM, 5 posts
Fri 1 Jul 2016
at 01:47
Dramatis Personae
Palmera High School Students

The Clique

Natalia Marconi
Affiliation: Art Club - High Priestess
Natalia is, bluntly, the princess of Palmera High and one of the stars of the senior girls volleyball team. Smart, beautiful, and a bit conniving when she needs to be, Natalia is closest thing the school has to leader of the 'popular girls' - colloquially known as The Clique. The truth is, the she seems born and bred for the role - most of the time she keeps a friendly and aloof demeanour around those outside of her usual social circle, preferring to let her friends/followers be the ones to get their hands dirty on her behalf. Half the time she doesn't even need to say anything before they act.

Isabelle Amadori
Affiliation: Art Club
The closest thing Natalia has to a second-in-command, Isabelle has always come up just a bit short compared to the princess in all areas but grades. The smartest of The Clique, Isabelle is just a bit pudgy and nerdy-looking to secure the top spot, and was never anything resembling athletically-inclined. Though, as much as she may live in Natalia's shadow, the pair have been best friends since kindergarten and are astonishingly loyal to each other for high school girls.

Kylie Harman
Affiliation: Art Club
The Napoleon Complex given form. Where Isabelle is the unspoken second-in-command of The Clique, Kylie is the spoken one. By herself. Loudly. Somewhere around five-foot-nothing, Kylie constantly seems to have something to prove, whether it be to herself or her peers. Kylie is typically the first to fall to outright bullying for 'the good of the group' or to 'teach someone a lesson'. Apparently that lesson is 'don't fuck with the short, insecure girl'. Despite everything, her grades are astoundingly average, as is her performance on the volleyball and soccer teams.

Mia Lang
Affiliation: Art Club
The Clique's star athlete, there doesn't seem to be a school sports team that Mia isn't on. Volleyball, basketball, soccer, track, wrestling, even a brief dabbling in chess club just to get her competitive fix. She shares the position of the school's top athlete with a one Melissa Lorentz, with the leadership of the school's clubs being split fifty-fifty between the two. With sports taking up most of her mental and social energy, Mia is one of the Clique's more loosely affiliated members and likely wouldn't be in the group at all were it not for her decade-old friendship with Natalia and Isabelle.

Gina Stanley
Affiliation: Art Club - Head Consort
Gina Stanley is, put gently, not a stunning example of humanity's brilliance. A constant source of "You'll never guess what Gina said today" anecdotes, what she lacks in intelligence, she makes up for in looks and athletic ability. Mostly in looks, and she has a hell of a lot to make up for. Scholars agree that Gina would unquestionably usurp Natalia's role as the school's top girl if she only had the brain cells for it. On the more serious side of things, teachers and a few of her friends have worried that her stupidity might get her into real trouble - getting pregnant or hooked on drugs, for example - causing most of her friends to become extremely protective of their trophy friend-slash-group child.

The Dorks

Naomi Nishimura
Affiliation: Art Club - Chief Advisor and Seer
On the complete opposite side of the social gulf is the trio led by Naomi Nishimura, solely by virtue of being the most intelligent and rational of the group. Naomi - 'Nishi' to anyone who agrees to call her that - has always had trouble sticking to a group of friends for a span of time longer than a semester. While she claims she's just picky about the people she hangs out with, most outside observers would agree that Nishi seems to be entirely apathetic toward the idea of long-term friendships and does her best to break off contact with most people before they get too close.

Jade Reyes
Despite Nishi's best efforts, two friends have managed to glue themselves to her, one of them being Jade Reyes. A bit on the dull side academically, Jade is one of those people who manages to fit into just about any social circle - including The Clique, unbelievably - but has difficulty forming close friendships, in part due to wanting to keep others from finding out about her troubled home life. Ultimately, Jade is most interested in music - particularly guitar - but due the aforementioned social issues, has failed utterly in her dream of starting a band. Instead, she passes the time uploading mediocre guitar covers to Youtube and enjoys her couple hundred hits.

Cecilia Williams
The third member of Team Dork, Cecilia ended up attaching herself to Nishi early enough on that she never managed to pry the chubby, glasses-wearing fluffball off her. Partly, this is due to Cecilia's pro-active attitude toward keeping contact with Nishi. Having a distinct fear of change and few other friends outside of The Trio, Cecilia has endeavoured to maintain what friendships she has by any means necessary. On a completely unrelated note, Cecilia is definitely not related to anyone from Jeanne's past and there's no reason for her to go digging in Cecilia's files. Definitely.

The Outcasts

Carina Karkinova
When Carina transferred in at the beginning of this school year, most students thought that an angel had descended amongst them. She was beautiful, funny, academically smart if a bit on the ditzy side. But as people got to know her, something about her story didn't quite add up. She already had two friends in the school: Sven and Shannon, who she seemed to have known since childhood. Being a Palmera native, the only reasonable explanation was that she had transferred from Coral. Unfortunately, Natalia Marconi was the first to uncover why: The only reason Carina seemed smart was because she was redoing her Junior year. Near the beginning of the previous school year, Carina had gotten pregnant at Coral and given birth to a healthy baby boy the next summer. With the support of her well-off parents (and child support from the father's), Carina transferred to Palmera High to start over with a clean-ish slate.

Had anyone but Natalia let the cat out of the bag, Carina might have still gotten along with her peers. Instead, the Princess crushed every bit of her new rival's social standing. With Carina branded as a slut - and a handful of rumours that she'd sleep with other students for a few bucks - Carina's budding new life was shattered. Her two childhood friends stuck with her, but unfortunately their reputations fell right along with her.

Sven Kristoffson
But Sven, bluntly, couldn't give half a fuck about his reputation at this point. In his last year, Sven was Chad's predecessor as football team star and captain, and even dated Natalia Marconi the previous year. A muscular blonde-haired, blue-eyed dreamboat, Sven also holds the high honour of being a highschooler with the five o'clock shadow of a grown man. While some rumours still float about that he is actually the father of Carina's son (which is often used to justify the reason why Natalia crushed Carina so thoroughly, seeing as they were still a couple at the time), the timeline doesn't add up whatsoever. In reality, Sven only wishes he were the child's father, if only so the boy could grow up with an actual father. Though, getting to brag that he was the lucky guy who got to put a baby in Carina would certainly be a plus. If only he could muster up the courage to actually ask her out.

Shannon Chevalier
Shannon, on the other hand, never had a god damn reputation. Always a wildcard and a delinquent, Shannon wasn't quite hardcore enough to fit in with the actual stoners, smokers or other students from broken homes. Instead, she mostly bothered Sven during her time in school, careful to dodge the ire of his (ex)girlfriend. Occasionally, rumours would spring up that the two were an item, but both Sven and Natalia would quash them just as quickly. Nonetheless, Shannon is known for being just the teensiest bit unstable and possibly bipolar. No one ever did find out for sure who left those death threats in Natalia's locker after she ruined Carina's reputation. It wasn't terribly hard to piece together, though.

The Girls

Melissa Lorentz
The undisputed most talented athlete in Palmera High, Melissa Lorentz likes to think of herself as a mature, levelheaded young woman with a strong sense of justice. Because of this, she does her best to keep well away from the petty politics of The Clique, despite her status and timeless friendship-rivalry with Mia Lang. On the other hand, this often gives some other students the impression of an aloof school celebrity who thinks herself above her peers.

Arlene Black
Affiliation: Art Club
Where Mel is the school's top athlete, Arlene is her counterpart in academics. Often (and perhaps rightly) thought of as the smartest student (or person) in school, Arlene is about as antisocial as they come. Despite her dedicated participation and success in extracurricular math and science challenges, Arlene has little in the way of what most students would call a 'life'. Or 'friends'. Smart and pretty she may be, but even the most outgoing and energetic friend-makers have a hard time competing with someone who speaks almost entirely in the language of glares and blank stares.

Alexandria Reid
Studious and serious, Alexandria can be seen as Natalia's counterpart amongst the broader group of girls less interested in politicking their way to the top. While Alex is often regarded by those outside of her circle of friends as cold and 'bitchy', those close to her generally agree that she's just shy - though her disdain for small talk certainly plays a part. Another member of the senior girls volleyball team, Alex rounds out the star players, along with Mel, Mia and Natalia. Though neither of them would ever admit it, Alex and Natalia have always had something of an unspoken rivalry, given their relative status in highschool society.

Jessica Fischer
Alex's best friend, it would be easy to Jessica as her second-in-command if their social circle had as strict a hierarchy as The Clique. Similar in many ways to Alex, where most would see Alex as cold and derisive, most would think Jessica more placid. It's not that she doesn't show emotions - she does - but they're generally much more subdued than her peers. Even playing on her beloved school soccer team, Jessica is known for showing only embarrassed, humble smiles during the team's most emotional moments. Jessica also has a younger sister named Paige a year lower, who is frequently mistaken to be Alexandria's sister due the similarities in their demeanour and appearances.

Sarah Jelenic
Sarah Jelenic can best be summed up as a person who gets along with everyone, but fits in with no one. Bright and peppy, Sarah always sits and converses with the biggest group of girls at lunch, but the only person she frequently hangs out with during her free time is Yun Seo. Whether it's shyness, a disdain for other girls, or something else, Sarah's status in the highschool hierarchy has always been something of an enigma. Regardless, she seems perfectly content with her one friend, despite what teachers and Elsie might presume.

Choi Yun Seo
Yun Seo immigrated from South Korea just before her first year of highschool, and has never been able to shake her status as 'the foreign student', despite her fluency in English. The idea of being friends with an exotic foreigner appealed to many of the other girls upon first arriving, but the novelty slowly wore off. Now simply 'the girl with the funny accent' (even if her accent isn't thick in the least), Yun Seo finds herself in a strange limbo between being a normal girl and falling further down the social ladder into irrelevance. That, along with the fact that she was (very briefly) part of Natalia's Clique has put a black mark on her reputation. Fortunately, Sarah Jelenic seems to have stuck with her, though some suspect it's simply because Yun Seo is weird and interesting to her.

The Guys

Chad Poplawski
The captain of the Palmera High football team (go Parrotfish) and often seen as Natalia's counterpart, Chad is something of an anti-jock. He's not bright, sure, but he's well-intentioned, friendly and uncannily sharp. Many have been stunned by Chad's intuition, often assuming that he's just a dull meathead. The truth is, Chad's senses can pick up just about anything, so long as it has no direct relation to himself. Classmate has a bit of a crush on someone else? The Chad knows. Classmate has a hidden hatred for Chad? They're probably just having a bad day, right? Chad also has a habit of picking up blow-off classes for the credits and ending up incredibly enthused with them. Art, home ec, drama, the works.

Darrell Barnes
The vice-captain of the Palmera High football team (go Parrotfish), Darrell is the right-hand broski of Chad. A much more laid-back and average high school student, Darrell follows Chad's example in being the opposite of a 70's-80's movie jock and gets along well with just about everyone. While he doesn't quite have Chad's intuition, Darrell tends to be more prone to acting on his feelings, sometimes (often) before he thinks.

Sean Mendes
And then there are the other guys. With boyish good looks that could safely secure him the "Blandly Attractive, Forgettable One" in a boy band, Sean is one of those teenagers that has an insatiable need to be the alpha male and dominate as many of his peers as possible. Though not terribly tall and only mildly athletic, Sean has found a place in the school band (the cool rock band part) which, combined with his natural charisma, usually keeps his need to be the coolest guy in the room satisfied.

Liam Holt
Serious and stern, Liam is a stickler for following the rules and his personal, stuffy social decorum. As expected of someone of Liam's character, he constantly trades places with Arlene Black as the student with the highest grades in Palmera High. Unlike Arlene, however, Liam has little desire to take part in any extracurricular activities, instead choosing to focus on studying and improving his grades. Unfortunately, despite the best efforts of his teachers, Liam has thus far failed to make any actual friends - even refusing to let others look at any of his notes.

Roy Leblanc
Seen as a musical prodigy, Roy Leblanc is an altogether average student in all other areas. He has his circle of friends, passable (albeit somewhat low) grades a fine home life. Despite all of this, Roy has had difficulty finding passion in anything and refuses to take part in the school band or even make any effort to start his own. Of course, the story was decidedly different before he dated Jade Reyes in their Sophomore year. The two got along well, but a rough break up followed troubles believed to have stemmed from Jade's family. Since then, Roy has listlessly coasted through life, just aiming to finish highschool and figure out his way from there.

Enzo Pereira
The best friend of Roy Leblanc, Enzo stands as a stark contrast to his gloomy buddy. Enzo has boundless energy and enthusiasm for the things he loves - mainly anime, manga and other facets of glorious nipponese culture. Strangely, Enzo also gets also astonishingly well with Chad Poplawski, and the two have been known to meet in secret to discuss the newest piece of Japanese cartoonery. To add to his exuberant mystique, Enzo has been known to join in the group of Nishi, Cecilia and Jade whenever Roy isn't around. Whether he's just friendly, interested in one of the girls or quietly trying to get Jade and Roy back together is anyone's guess.

This message was last edited by the GM at 01:58, Wed 14 Sept 2016.

 GM, 8 posts
Fri 1 Jul 2016
at 06:46
Dramatis Personae
Palmera Citizens

Erin Fry
The bartender at Soggy's, the most frequented pub by the teachers of Palmera High (and by just about everyone who can't afford the touristy places and fancy clubs), Erin is a Palmera native working to pay her way through college. Chipper and with a knack for understanding what people need and want to hear, Erin always manages to muster up a smile for regular and lost tourist alike.

Chuck Carter
The cook at Soggy's, Chuck has a bad habit of leaving his post during slow hours to wander around the bar and mingle with the regulars or playfully harass the not-so-regulars. Or vice versa. To the surprise of no one or everyone, Chuck has managed to stay single well into his prime... Whatever that may be, seeing as he's been notoriously evasive about his actual age. Most would guess somewhere in his late thirties.

This message was last edited by the GM at 16:37, Fri 16 Sept 2016.

 GM, 183 posts
Wed 14 Sep 2016
at 02:04
Dramatis Personae

Strain: [REDACTED]
School: [REDACTED]
The father of Jeanne Olbright, Sherine and their sisters.


Youngest - Sherine
Strain: [REDACTED]
School: [REDACTED]

This message was last edited by the GM at 02:06, Mon 24 Oct 2016.

 GM, 184 posts
Wed 14 Sep 2016
at 02:35
Dramatis Personae

William "Billy" Winters
Position: [REDACTED]

Vera Winters
Position: Commander

Mister Hao
Position: [REDACTED]

The Choir Girls

Status: Unknown
The first leader of the Choir Girls, Blackmoney was just as often referred to as their handler, tamer or owner. No one ever managed to get her real name out of her, but that didn't keep her from getting close (perhaps too close) to her charges. Blackmoney was always 'one of the girls' and never acted as anything more. Though her peers would criticize her lack of professionalism, that very trait would be the key to her success in leading the Choir Girls.

Ultimately, Blackmoney was marked down as MIA after three years leading the unit, when she seemingly vanished into thin air during an assignment.

Luka Charkova
Status: Mage
Path: Thyrsus
Affiliation: Art Club - Court Wizard
Recruited in her late teens, Luka was always the baby of the group. In many ways, she idolized Blackmoney and took after her late(?) mentor, slowly transitioning from rebellious teenager to friendly, outgoing sexual tyrannosaur over the course of her time with the Choir Girls. In the end, Luka had the most immediate success after the unit was disbanded, awakening as a Mage and setting herself up in sunny Paradise, California. Much of Luka's past after that point is shrouded in mystery.

Annie May Springfield
Status: Unknown

Ivy "Uzi" Evans
Status: Unknown
The munitions expert of the unit, Uzi was always a bit of a paranoid weirdo, probably not helped by her work validating most of her off-beat conspiracy theories. It was likely that very paranoia that led to Uzi's single-minded fascination with guns and explosions. Though her all her drooling over the latest and greatest perforation machines, it was her uzi (of which there were actually several, covering just about every variant under the sun) that held a special place in her heart and gave her her nickname.

When the Choir Girls disbanded, Uzi managed to cover her tracks the best. Absolutely no one knows where she's hiding, though most would agree she's either cooped up in a hidden bunker with more guns than a small country or dead. Possibly both.