That one step seemed so normal but mid-step it felt like being pulled through water, a thick barrier opening up once again into air. Instantly the world was changed, the black remains of the trees around the area were suddenly alive with bright leaves, a riotous blend of vivid greens, vibrant blues, autumnal reds and even rich purples that gathered around each other. Each one had a myriad of strange alien flowers, none like any a human eye would have seen. Some were long multicoloured ribbons that curled like the topper on a present, others were in the shapes of tiny animals each connected to their tree by their tail.

The path that was cracked and dusted was now pristine white marble stones, moss and tiny blades of grass weaving their way between each one. Flowers around them danced gently with the movement of feet, insects stirring and scattering from the new arrivals.

To the side of the path was a clearing in the lush grass, home to a grand dining table with at least 12 ornate but mismatched chairs lining the sides. At each end was a larger chair with a high back, the arm rests were all carved in amazing details of animals, elements and shapes that woven together with immaculate passion.

The table itself is laid with fine plates, cups, pots and bowls all with assortments of sumptuous delights piled on tiered stands, large cakes adorned with fruit and colours of sugar art, sandwiches placed in fine pyramids and the scent of exotic spices filled the air, rising from the many steaming teapots dotted across the surface. The clinking of forks and cups echoed through the clearing, two visible individuals sat in chairs opposite each other helping themselves to slices of cake that they ate with fine silverware off small plates.

One figure had a very thin body, but his head seemed unnaturally large. He had a large nose in the centre of two bright pink cheeks. Sparse brown hair could be poking out from underneath a large green hat, the golden thread patterns catching the light and glistening. His suit was a fine velvet purple outer coat, the pale green ruffled shirt poked out from the ends of the sleeves and under his chin. His eyelids were slightly puffy but the wide eyes with small pupils could be clearly seen staring unblinking at the figure in the other chair.

The other was clearly not human, the long animal face and long wide ears were obvious giveaways. The being’s white mouth and chin were complimented by the ragged white scruff of hair between the twitching ears. A deep red suit was ruffled a little as if the sleeves had been pulled up repeatedly over many years, a blue bow was torn slightly by clawed paws that had straightened it far to many times. But those digits were now holding onto a fork which was being used to stir a large cup of liquid, emerging to chime against the rim before returning to stir.

Joe stood at the section of the path that opened up to the clearing that appeared to hold what looked to be the Mad Hatter's tea party, waiting for the others to catch up.

Turning to Julian, Jemima and Lilith, he gave a soft huff. "So..any thoughts on how we should approach this other than yell hello and ask to join them for a cuppa?"

Julien sucked his teeth, his green eyes mischievous as he met Joe's gaze. The smirk that crossed his mouth was positively evil, tongue showing briefly between his teeth.

"Why the fuck not, Mostly-Call-Me-Irish?" he declared.

He gave the other man a roguish wink and lengthened his stride, long legs carrying him quickly towards the table. After all, this whole goddamn thing was some sort of mental break anyway - had to be. One did not just teleport from some burnt-out, dusty locale to a verdant forest with a dining table smack in the middle of it.

Also, hares didn't drink tea.

"Evenin' Gov'nahs," he said, his accent thickened just a little. He bowed at the waist, sweeping his hat off his head. "Name's Julien Chevalier. My friends and I were wondering if we might 'ave a little tea, wot?"

Just a bit of a fucking Jackeen there Julien

Joe resisted the urge to roll his eyes back into his skull from Julien's blustering manner and slowly wandered behind him, coming to a stop a respectful distance from the table, waiting to see what the two figures at the table would do.

Lilith grinned at Julien as they walked. "I'm partial to a top hat myself but hat get in the way more often than not,so they bother me. You are rather dapper in that hat if i do say so myself."

She winked at him as the scene changed quickly. Lilith gasped audibly and goggled at the scene. "maybe..." She faltered as Julien walked towards the table. She sighed heavily and pinched her nose.

Lilith walked up to Joe and glanced over to him, "Some people never learn eh?' She said cheerfully, gesturing vaguely in Julien's direction.

Joe glanced over to Lilith, "As my Mum loved to say, Cuir síoda ar ghabhar ach is gabhar i gcónaí é !"

Lilith looked at Joe Extremely puzzled trying to work out what he just said.

"Um What?" she said cocking her head to the side like she was trying to roll the words around in her head to make them be understood.

"Can you run that by me again Joe? was it?"
This message was last edited by the player at 11:25, Wed 10 June 2020.

"Heh, sorry. Sounds a lot better saying it in Gaelic than English. Basically, Dress a goat in silk and he still remains a goat."

"As long as he's not a Judas goat..." Jemima added in an amused tone of voice as she came up alongside the pair. The daft chap's antics weren't likely (she guessed) to put them in immediate danger, and the promise of imminent caffeine had improved her mood immediately.

The conversation between the two characters stopped abruptly at the sound of a new voice. The Hatter lifted his lip in almost a sneer, baring large front teeth that seemed to large to fit behind the thin lips.

“Wot?” said the Hatter in a nasally voice, mocking Julien “How rude of you to assume there is time here for you and your hat!”

The Hare's ears turned and to face Julien as the large lagomorph  head joined it, large rectangular pupils focusing on the hat-less Englishman.

“And interrupting us in the middle of a very important conversation!” he turned back to the Hatter”, voice casual again as if the humans were not even there “ As I was saying old chap the high ratio of icing will cause the cake to collapse, this obviously represents the failure of the system to support its people”

The Hatter turned the sneer to the hare,

“But the icing is the best part! Surely you don't really intend to take that side!”

Large ears leaned back in a relaxed pose,

“Not at all Hatty, the icing is lovely but is lacks substance. It only matters when it is paired with the cake”

The Hatter gave a gasp of understanding, fork raised and taking another bite of the cake before pointing it towards his friend.

“Ah I see too much and the cake becomes a visualisation of the superficial aspects of society, too little and there is a lack of enjoyment!” he paused for a brief moment, lost in thought before looking back at the Hare “How about we turn the cake upside down and have the icing on the bottom with the cake on top?”

The Hare smiled at the Hatters understanding,

“Precisely dear boy!” he said happily, he listened to the proposal before offering his rebuttal “The icing cannot support the weight of the cake, therefore its doomed to failure”

“Ah but what is we placed it into a cup? That would add integrity and lead to an entirely new political system” said the Hatter, lifting up a cup and taking a sip.

The Hare shook his head, large ears clipping the edge of the chair he sat at.

“No point, we all know that behind the Queen are the mice that have rigged the system in the first place.”

The Hatter scoffed in frustration,

“Oh I cannot stand those mice, they Squirrels used to have such great policies until the Parrots too it foo far. Now they are just part of the rebellion and no one will listen to them!”

The Hare sighed.

“Such a shame, the squirrels have so much nicer tails than the mice! Why did the Parrots have to steal that wagon. Their message was completely lost!”
This message was last updated by the player at 03:14, Fri 12 June 2020.

“The squirrels had such better hands for making cakes! The parrots did not have the right dexterity and their feathers ruined the batter!” said the Hatter in a defeated tone.

“But they did make amazing decorations” he said, pointing at the striped feather coming out of the top of the Hatters hat. The Hatter followed his pointed paw and reached up to touch the tip before laughing bashfully at his friends compliment.

Who knew his own hallucinations could be so fucking rude to him. And after he was so polite with the bowing and everything too. Julien's eyes flicked back and forth between the two as they spoke, comparing cake to politics, and he couldn't help but think there was a kind of sense in their words.

Except it was probably a terrible insult to cake to compare the two.

The Englishman wasn't at all put off by their dismissal, though. He settled his hat neatly back on his electric blue hair and waited for them to finish their conversation, eyes tracking to the feathered decoration in question.

It was terribly fabulous. He didn't say so, though, this time preferring to wait until they were ready to talk.

Wait shmaite (the height of common English gibberish), there's hangover curatives on that table! Knowing in her heart (and literary brain) that in this place particularly it would be better to beg forgiveness than ask permission, Jemima took action.

Her ears were on the conversation, but her eyes, wide and bright, searched the table for anything that actually asked to be eaten (as she didn't feel like a size change would be desirable at this point, beyond the imminent temporary stretching of her belly). Not seeing any, she pulled out a white wooden chair, padded with crimson and gold, and plonked down on it as the Hatter and Hare distracted each other with talk of feathers.

She picked up a teapot, checked that there was, indeed, tea and not a door-mouse inside, and poured herself a steaming cup.

"Rebellion?" she asked, as she reached for a slice of white-iced lemon tea cake.

Joe blinked as the Hatter and Hare bantered on with metaphors relating cake to political system stuff, though the bit about the different animals making things made him frown slightly...was this potentially a reference to what the cat had said about other things having come before? Also, how the heck would parrots steal a wagon?

Not having received an invitation to sit down , Joe walked up and stood slightly off and behind Jemima, keeping an eye on their surroundings as well as what was occurring at the table.

Tea did pour from the pot that Jemima held, a rich blue colour that smelt very sweet like berries and black tea leaves. The Hatter turned to her and huffed as he pointed his cake fork towards her,

“Where have you been?” he said rudely, “It's bad enough that you turn up so late but you bring a bunch of riff raff here with... with their hats!” he pointed at Julien's hat as if it had just insulted him.

“Clearly she picked them up from somewhere, at least one of them is well dressed” said the Hate, leaving back and eyeing off Julien once again. Then turning back to meet Joe's eyes,

“It's rude to just loiter by someones tea party, do you have somewhere else to be?”

“The rebellion my dear is the suspected rise againts the queens new rules, though you didn't hear it from me” he said with a smirk “Even I didn't hear it from me so we're all in the clear”

He paused,

“Who did I hear it from Marchy?”

“Old boy I don't tend to fraternise with the voices you hear but if my memory serves me promptly I think it came straight from the horses mouth” he said, taking a sip of his tea “The one pulling the wagon the parrots stole”

Joe looked blandly back at the Hare "I had not received an invitation to join, therefore I have not sat."

His hat was insulted and his sense of dress praised in the same breath. It was just as confusing as one might expect, really. Since Jemima had been welcomed once she sat down, Julien took a seat by her. He also found a teapot containing tea and not a doormouse and poured himself a cup.

The Hatter raised his eyes at Joe,

“Good thing to, we didn't send any” he blurted out followed by a chaotic laugh. “Sit down boy, you're distressing the cutlery”

Nearby on the table a faint snoring sound could be heard from a large silver soup bowl, the lid an ornate make of roses and vines working their way to the top and making a handle.

“I thought you left those at home” said the hare, gesturing to the cutlery. “I get sick of hearing them whine”

“No those were glasses and we only have tea at the table this time” reassured the Hatter, calming a shaking spoon.

Joe nodded politely, then took the seat next to Jemima.

Noticing that both Jemima and Julien had opened the top of the pot they had chosen before pouring a cup, Joe did the same thing, only seeing tea inside...although it appeared blue in color...

After pouring a cup and taking a sip, Joe gave an appreciative sigh. "My compliments on the teas you serve gentlemen!"

Lilith giggled as she joined Joe in sitting down. "would you pass the tea please Joe?" She held out an odd cup that was in front of her to him.

Joe nodded, then carefully poured Lilith an almost full cup being very mindful not to spill any while pouring.

Julien, already possessing a full cup of tea, lifted a couple of platter lids to see what was inside. Perhaps not as wary as his companions of a change in size, or even maybe forgetting it was a possibility, he picked up a biscuit he found and set it on the side of his saucer, carefully replacing the lid.

The snoring from the soup bowl was highly intriguing, setting his fingertips to itching with the desire to lift the lid. If he remembered the story well enough, he could guess at what - or rather who - might be in there.

He licked the corner of his mouth and, instead of giving into temptation, for the moment, he picked up the biscuit instead and took a bite.

The soup bowl mumbled slightly, a scratching sound from within rising as the lid lifted and a small nose emerging and twitching. The Dormouse was the size of a large cat, pouring over the silver lid of the bowl and slowly stepping across the table only to make his new bed on a pile of cucumber sandwiches.

“Dormy no!” sighed the Hatter “Can't you see we have guests? Sleep on the bagels!”

The little mumbling mouse looked up and around at the new company at the table before crawling over to Lilith and curling up on the large platter of bagels in front of her. In seconds there was a soft snoring coming from them. The Hatter gave a small sound of endearment at his little friend.

“The Rebellion is such a curious thing, nothing of it in my day.” he said, pouring another cup of tea, the sound of liquid falling echoing through the china. “The Queen was more relaxed, be-headings used to be such a casual thing. Apparently that's not the case anymore”

The tea was still pouring.

“Apparently she doesn't even hold Croquet competitions anymore. But its been a while since anyone came through with news, we haven't seen Rasul in ages!”

The Hare nodded sadly,

“Lots of your type though!” he said, pointing at Joe “They come here all confused and leave just the same.... never see the same ones twice though”

The teapot the Hatter was holding still poured tea enthusiastically into the cup on the table.

Joe gently gestured to the surrounds with his teacup "This place is just a bit different from where we are from..."
If there's been a deviation from the book..what is it...maybe that could be an indication of what this fuckery is all about....
"Mr Hatter, what changed?"

Raising an eyebrow at "your type", Jemima let questions pour through her mind as smoothly as the floral tea slid down her throat.

So, they're not the only outsiders who've been through... whatever this is they're going through. Why don't they come back? Because they wake up from this dream? Because they pass some kind of test? Because, and there's no sense ignoring nastier possibilities, they die?

Was she actually expected? Or was that just more nonsense from the Hatter?

Just what is the matter with Julien's hat? She thought it rather a natty one, and just the proper style (oh don't start that or you'll get an ear worm, silly girl).

Instead of asking any of this, she listened. Joe had asked such a perspicacious question, it seemed sensible to wait for an answer. If it involved tarts, she wouldn't be at all surprised. Mmm, tarts. Not immediately spotting one, she reached for a slice of elegantly chequered Battenburg cake instead.

The Hatter tutted the question, tapping his spoon against the edge of his cup to produce a series of unique notes.

“Hmmmm I'd say it was the King went mad and accused the Queen of having mice inside her brain. Said they were running on wheels and controlling her body. So the Queen executed him when he kept setting up mice traps around her bed”

The Hare shook his head, ears waving slightly

“No no dear boy, the Knave conspired with the King to kill her because of her new ruling over pastries. The icing dear boy, the icing! Pure Treason!”

He took a green apple and bit into it, revealing a bright purple inside

“I thought he went mad?”

“He was already there old chap, few could be married to her and retain any form of true sanity”
This message was last updated by the player at 03:56, Fri 07 Aug 2020.

“That is such a shame, both of them were working hard to control Red when she started acting out.” said the Hatter, shaking his head slowly “Her majesty always had a bad habit of attracting troublesome children, like the one that ruined the court case over the stolen Tarts!”
This message was last edited by the player at 03:55, Fri 07 Aug 2020.

“No, they never did” responded the Hare, lowering his head in a moment of silence “Such a shame”

Joe kept a neutral look on his face as he digested the information provided..or attempted to at least.

Ok so if I remember right the King and Jack of hearts was still around in the book..but the rest of it?! Pastries? Icing? Stolen tarts?? Hang on...the knave of hearts he stole those tarts maybe or was that something else...dammit...here's hoping somebody else gets that reference

Joe looked over at Jemima and let some of his confusion show before taking another sip of the seriously tasty blue tea.

Jemima arched an eyebrow at the look from Joe, then, perceiving it to be her cue, calmly placed her teacup back in its saucer with a soft chime of china against china.

"Ah yes, the infamous Alice. What ever did happen to her?"

Well at least they knew what happened to the king, though dead and mad (put the priority where you will), he was unlikely to be any help.

However... Alice had escaped. The cards had piled atop her and she had woken up. How it was perceived on this side, well therein might lie a clue to their own escape. True, afterwards Alice had returned to Wonderland. That second time, Alice had taken hold of the Red Queen and shaken her, triggering the second escape. Jemima shuddered. She'd been hoping to avoid the Queen entirely, but it was seeming more and more like an inevitability. She looked around the table at her party (adventuring party, tea party, here one and the same) and felt some little relief that, unlike Alice, she wasn't facing this nonsense alone.

“Oh you knew her?” said the Hare, ears turning towards Jemima “Charming child, little slow but still. Well the same thing that happens to anyone who steals from the Queen, she was captured and executed.”

He took a small candy out a bowl which wiggled slightly before the Hare bit down with his large teeth.

“Why are you all wearing different clothes?” said the Hatter dramatically, pointing at all who were at the table

“None of you are dressed the same, some of you look like you're ready for bed! Only that one looks up for a tea party, is it night time out there?”

"Where I'm from, that is correct Hatter. Finished work for the day then it looks like I fell asleep on the sofa after dinner given I have clothes on"

"I think I fell asleep partying," Julien remarked, unconcerned. He was more focused on the Alice bit. Caught and executed? Not if he remembered the story correctly. Well, perhaps they thought she had been executed when she had, in fact, woken up.

"Might I ask, on the subject of Miss Alice, have you seen proof she was, in fact, executed and not... oh, I don't know... vanished or somesuch."

These two were nuttier than a squirrel turd, and probably wouldn't even think twice about the directness of that question.

“Well obviously I haven't seen it personally of course,” said the Hare in a drawling voice, looking at Julien like a child “But a few that have passed through here have said they have seen her head on display in the Queens gallery”

He took a sip of his tea,

“Such is the fate of all who she disapproves of. I suppose you could visit but I wouldn't recommend it”

“I would be nice to get out once and while” said the Hatter “But then the tea would get cold!”

He opened his mouth and laughed hysterically, the Hare joined in the din and the two cheered and exchanged wide eyed looks of sharing an inside joke that was apparently hilarious. They laughed solidly for nearly a minute before stopping, the Hatter turned to Julien,

“I see good humour is lost on humans as usual. Anyway we are far more interesting than her, people with bodies usually are”

"Huh..." Julien said slowly, stirring his tea with one long finger then sucking it clean in thought. "Her head... how... interesting. Though, as you say, not as interesting as people with bodies. Or hares with bodies, for that matter."

He glanced at his companions - the ones he'd woken with, not the others. He wondered, was the head some other Alice? Or the same Alice in some other timeline? Or... something else...? This whole situation was like the story, but at the same time not like the story, and it wouldn't at all surprise him, in fact, if Alice's head was on a pike somewhere in the Queen's courtyard.

"Tell me, then, what did you think of Alice, when she visited with you?"

The two looked in silence for a moment, staring at Julien while thinking, the Hatter tapped his chin with his finger,

"Well.... she was.... a little dull, she was rather rude and didn't really like our little party. She came and left very quickly. It was sad, we don't often get visitors that stay for long"

"Probably because there's never any time" said the Hare with a laugh that the Hatter joined in on, another inside joke...

"Alice was a simple child, far too many things went over her head.... shame the axe didn't"

Another roar of laughter between the two.

Time? half a mo..wasn't there a conversation about time between these characters and Alice in the book.....now what was it....

Joe looked over the table and picked out a small muffin to put on his plate before pouring another cup of tea, looking over to see if any of the others desired a refill.

"Well, most people would not wish to impose on another's hospitality for too long, that would be a bit rude? Time does have a habit of running away from people when they are occupied"

The two roared with laughter, at the comment.

"Run away from you!" said the Hatter while wiping away tears "What a hilarious jape, Time left this party long ago"

He pointed to a clock hanging on a tree, the golden rim still shining as if brand new but the hands stood still at 4:30. He returned to the laughter with the Hare, the blood vessels in his eyes clearer now.

"Just because Time has left you doesn't mean it won't hound your guests," Julien pointed out, shaking a finger slightly at the Hatter. "Indeed, if Alice's head is now on a pike, it would seem Time caught up with her, sure enough."

The Hatter raised an eyebrow at Julien,

"The hounds will not bother you here, Time won't set foot near this table." he paused and sat back in his chair "We had a... disagreement long ago"

A slight movement of her head indicated to Joe that Jemima didn't want a refill. She picked up a napkin and brushed the crumbs from her fingers.

She murmured, "If what we believed to be true, is, then I imagine the child's head didn't end up on an actual pike. Contrarywise, if what we believed to be true isn't, and what we've been told is, then..." she lifted her eyes to the Hatter, "disagreements with time might be the least of our worries."

Alice had been in a dream, or so Mr Carroll had written. She'd 'escaped' when she'd woken up and until now, Jemima had been rather hoping that this would be the case for herself. She frowned at her cake crumbs. She couldn't remember a dream that had been this vivid. Not ever.

"Running out of tea, running out of cake, running out of time, running out of hospitality..." she shook her head as though to clear it, placed the napkin on her plate and stood. "I thank you both, for all of the above, but I do believe that we should press on before we run out of anything else," like sanity.

Joe nodded slightly at Jemima and made sure to savor his muffin as much as he could while downing it in 4 bites. Back to the twisted maze it seems!

Raising his teacup, Joe saluted the Hatter and Hare with a polite "Sláinte chugat!" before finishing off the rest of his cup

Julien glanced up from his tea and his food and shrugged. He didn't mind moving on. He took up his hat as he stood, sweeping another bow to the Hatter and the Hare before he strode off after his companions.

"Wait for me!"

"Running out of time! Ha!" remarked the Hatter, pointing at Jemima with his little finger while holding a cup before bursting into laughter with the Hare joining him "That's a good one."

"As for Alice, well I'm sure she disagrees with her head being being cut off as well"

"I don't know many who do agree with it dear boy" said Hare with a snigger "But I suppose everyone has their hobbies... dramatic or otherwise"

Jemima, despite the decisive and, alright, slightly dramatic exit (though of course, nowhere near as dramatic as losing one's head!), had no intention of leaving Julien or anyone else behind. After only a few short strides, still within earshot of the table, she whirled to face her companions, wrinkled-shirt-clad arms outstretched.
"Well I don't know about anyone else but that didn't do much to help," this was a lie as the tea had helped her hangover immensely, "beyond making me doubly sure that facing the Queen," one finger now jabbed in the direction of the red spire, or at least where she thought it was, "is going to be, to coin a phrase, our end-game, and we're nowhere near ready. It doesn't fill me with confidence that we've had at least two warnings about time now, too." Both hands dropped to her sides with a soft 'phwap' of defeat as she waited for the others' opinions to be voiced.
This message was last edited by the player at 11:32, Fri 01 Jan 2021.

Julien nearly crashed into Jemima, so abrupt was her halt. He managed not to, balancing on the balls of his booted feet briefly before he rocked back onto his heels and stepped back a pace. He reached up to adjust the sit of his hat.

"Endgame? You're talking like this is a video game." A pause as he considered that analogy. "Not that you're wrong. It's kind of... working that way too, innit?" He sucked his teeth briefly. "Alright, so if we do think of it that way, and you're right about the... not being ready part... then obviously we have to... level up. How do we go about that?"

Walking away from the table one can still hear the clink of china and the pouring of tea behind them, yet with one more step the sounds are gone. The beautiful living trees with their lush foliage are replaced to the more familiar black burned remain. The beautiful stone path now cracked and covered in dirt. Ahead the sky is no longer bright but that sullen overcast gold where time was indiscernible.

You realise now that you feel neither less hungry or thirsty than when you first sat down at the fabled table.

Looking behind you can no longer see the table where you were just sitting, just the winding path you followed from the meeting with the cat. Though from the corner of your eye you could swear you saw figures walking behind you, only for them to disappear the very moment you step over that threshold back into the wastelands.

They looked so familiar.

END OF CHAPTER