Armadillo's getting a bit out to sea.

"Hi, kid. Wait- Woody Allen made a movie about Spider-man? Figures."

When Fleischman mentions only running into Spider-Man once, Armadillo just mutters about him being lucky.

Thinking over the waitress' offer, he answers "Cold pizza, maybe?" (Everyone knew that cold, leftover pizza was the best breakfast in the world. But not something a restaurant, typically, served for breakfast. He was either testing a theory, or was just... confused.)

He left that 'Maurice' guy for USAgent to talk to, in a* "if you like USAgent so much, YOU talk to him" moment.

Moving forward, he took his chances interrupting the couple "Hey. Sorry, were you saying someone's got super man-eating powers around here?

That's an option?"


*(frankly petty, and I'm saying that, even as his narrator)
This message was last edited by the player at 15:21, Wed 05 Aug 2020.

At the mention of cold pizza, Iceman nods in approval. "Make that two," he says, motioning to 'Dillo. "Big guy here's probably gonna need one all to himself." He thinks back to all the weird looks the other X-Men used to give him for liking cold food, especially Professor X. Sometimes the mutant leader would order pizza for everyone at the school, and Bobby would insist on eating his slices cold. Charles must have thought Bobby was just doing it to be a rebel. After all, who could fathom that someone might just actually like cold pizza? Armadillo's comment leaves Iceman feeling vindicated.

If I can hit this milestone in such a ridiculous way, I'd like to attempt to:

3 XP when you rebel against Xavier’s philosophy

At the mention of pizza, Fleischman seems to finally take notice of the other conversations. "Pizza? In this wasteland? They have something flat and covered with cheese and sauce, but I'd hardly call that pizza. Once you've had a slice from L&B's, there's no going back." he says.

Squirrel Girl peered up at Moondragon when she made the realization of what their situation was. She waited until she had smiled at and thanked Shelly for the coffee with almond milk, and taken a dainty sip, before speaking. The super squirrel kept her voice low.

"Yeah, I know. Stay cool, MD. When you end up in a fictional place, you're not supposed to tell the locals that unless you absolutely gotta. It never helps." SG and Tippy-Toe kept their eyes open and searching the room, watching and listening to see if anything odd (for Cicily) was going on. Her focus was broken when Lockjaw moves up to get all friendly, and Doreen lit up like a Christmas tree in New York. She immediately got to petting him and telling him what a good boy he was, as is right and proper.

It seemed Tippy-Toe was left on her own to scour the room for clues.

Moondragon winced, the sort of face one made when they wanted a favorite radio station or podcast, and only picked up static. “A valid point, Doreen.” She noticed that the “locals” hastily dropped numerous references to the superhuman life of New York City. “Clever,” she mused aloud, almost a congratulatory nod for the force responsible.

“A different tactic, then.” She ambled back toward Joel Fleischer with a look that passed for “Friendly” in her mind. “Dr. Fleischer. Exactly how much time do you have left working off your student loans? I know only too well myself the unfathomable burden of dwelling among...lesser minds and tastes. I imagine that still weighs heavily upon you.”

She pivoted toward Maggie, smiling as if appraising her beautiful features or something more. “Almost as heavy as the burden of a life lived with the knowledge that your love is always doomed.” Her smile feigned a mutual understanding between women fighting a lifetime in the trenches in the battlefield of Love. “I know my candidness must shock you, but what I see in your memories weighs almost as heavily upon me as I sense it weighs upon your heart.”

Moondragon nodded sagely. “I myself have known the horrors of a lover claimed too soon by Death. One of my own ex-lovers was the living avatar of Death herself, so I know of what I speak. My own beloved Phyla died in battle...but you were not as fortunate as I to be reunited with a departed one after they achieved the impossible and returned to the Realm of The Living.

 I myself have overcome death. Twice.”

Her hand reached out to touch Maggie’s shoulder. “As an ordinary mortal, though, you cannot know the wonders of the Cosmos, and the generosity it has shown me and mine.” Moondragon chose her words deliberately, seeking a reaction to her knowing the intimate details of their lives. Her smile curled knowingly, as she thought, And THIS is the result of a season of living with a pop-culture fanatic who must surely have binge-watched every television show in existence.

I call your bluff, O’ Architect of Illusion & Trickery.

A. holds a clawed hand up in a 'hold on' gesture. "Hang on- these folks were just talking about some guy eating people and getting superpowers off that."

(beat)

"Not instead of the pizza, Ice, gross. Just, you know, 'check it out."

As Moondragon has buttonholed the people he was talking to, Armadillo turned to Ed for further enlightenment.

"What, like Dracula?"*

*Not this time. Baron Blood, yes, but not Dracula. (Somewhere, Baron Blood is all "I need to work on my brand-name recognition".)
This message was last edited by the player at 17:05, Thu 06 Aug 2020.

Fleischman nods at Moondragon. "FleischMAN" he corrects. "And yes, my indentured servitude. Thanks for reminding me." he adds sarcastically. "Today is the three hundredth and ninety seventh day of my sentence. That means I have one-thousand, sixty-three days left."

Maggie gets much more defensive. "What's that supposed to mean?! People die ya know. Just because a few of my boyfriends happen to do that while they were my boyfriends, doesn't mean I'm doomed!" She does not really sound convinced of her own words.

Maurice sidles up to US Agent. "US Agent. THE US Agent. Right here in Cicely. So tell me. What brings a gen-u-INE hero way out here to these parts?" he asks pronouncing genuine so it rhymes with nine.

Back at the table, Shelley ticks off the order. "So that's two COLD pizzas, anything else?"

Holling (the old bartender guy) addresses Armadillo. "'Armadillo?' Why do they call you that?" he asks, giving Armadillo and up and down look.

Ed reacts to the question about the cannibalism. "It's an old Inuit legend. Anyone engaging in cannibalism in the wilderness is cursed to become a Wendigo. That's a big hairy monster that runs around eating more people."

“Yes, providing healthcare in an artist’s colony surrounded by beautiful wilderness is practically slavery,” Moondragon said with an arched eyebrow. “If you want to discuss true hardship, imagine your hands being crippled by the king of Nordic gods, and STILL being required to service this community. Although I have heard of a different pantheon being active in this part of the world.” The denizens of “Cicely” doubled down on their charade, so Moondragon kept up her baiting.



“You needn’t deny your tragedies to me, Maggie.” On the surface, she sounded sympathetic. “I see your anxiety in your thoughts with crystalline clarity.” She wondered how long this rise would continue, when the hidden architect would show themselves.

Squirrel Girl's attention was over on Moondragon, but she still glanced over to Shelly as she continued taking orders.

"I'd like a slice of pecan pie, if you pe-can be so kind. Hey, are there any super types active out in this neck of the woods? We haven't met any lately, and it'd be great to know you're as well taken care of as New York or LA." Another sip of her hot drink and her attention was back on Heather's ploy.

"I don't think that'd be a good idea, Tippy-Toe."

"It's too risky."

"Of course I trust you, I just... okay, fine. But you come back here in a hurry. It's cold out there."

With that, the little grey squirrel climbed down her partner and sought out an exit, intending to go looking for other local squirrels. SG turned back to Shelly with a smile.

"Sorry, Tippy-Toe just has to use the little squirrel's room."

Armadillo thought about this. Alaska was in the Initiative, back when there was one. It wasn't like he'd memorized every state's team, but he was pretty sure they had to have someone, what with Russia being visible from there and all. He wracked his brain...



...and his brain had nothin' so far.

 The cold-pizza thing should have not worked. He looked, knowingly, at Iceman. [OOC: Iceman's reaction (or lack of reaction) to his reaction is gonna set something off (probably a reaction). Just a head's up. ;)]


Still a bit out of his element, Armadillo just let his mouth hang open at that one.

"It's an old nickname." he finally said, a bit lamely.



That barely narrowed it down (even Tony, with his limited experience, had worked with a few people matching that description). Rather than pursue the first question that popped to mind ("'In the wilderness'?' So if you did it in town...?") he went with something a bit more practical.

"So, you've got one of these Wendiguys around here?"
This message was last edited by the player at 14:15, Sun 09 Aug 2020.

Joel looks confused. He crinkles up his nose and squints at Moondragon. "Nordic gods?? Other pantheon? I'm afraid you lost me there. Although if your hands are still injured, I can have a look at them for you." he offers.



Maggie stays defensive. "You see my thoughts?! Those are private. My gosh, you're worse than Fleischman!" She pushes past Moondragon and heads out of the Brick in a huff.

"One slice of pecan pie." Shelley says, adding it to the order slip she was taking notes on. Her eyes go wide at the mention of superheroes. "Super heroes? Oh no! I seen some on the TV when Holling got the satellite dish, but I had to stop watching. I heard some people talking about one coming to Alaska a while back. She sounded like a real badass. And a few people talk about Alpha Flight every so often. They're Canadian." she says.

Tippy-Toes heads out of the Brick and back into town. As she runs along the street towards the woods, she notices the townspeople going about their business. But they're less active than people usually are and than they were before when the group was out on the street. They're more loafing about, like they're waiting for the next thing to happen.

Out in the woods, she finds a couple of squirrels. One is a bit portly, the other is short. They smell like maple syrup. "Good day, eh."* the portly one says with a thick Canadian accent. "I'm Bob and this is Doug." "Good day." Doug says.


* Translated from Squirrelish

"Oh no." Ed says matter-of-factly. "It's just a legend. The closest thing we've got is Adam. And he doesn't like people. At least, that's what Doctor Fleischman said. And there's Jessi. He's a bear."

At the mention of Jessi, Holling's jaw tightens. "I'll get those drinks." he says, moving himself out of the conversation.

"Holling and Jessi have history. They don't like each other very much." Ed says.

Iceman returns 'Dillo's look with a nod.


"Why's that?" Iceman asks, looking over the menu some more.

Tony noted Iceman's reaction, and moved ahead. Armadillo, gently as possible, takes Moondragon aside and says those three little words that she didn't ever expect to hear him say.

"You were right."

The U.S.Agent has sat with fists on the table, looking around the place slowly with a glazed stare. When Maurice comes up to him, the 'Agent's blank stare finally locks into a present expression with a blink. "What are we doing here? Why, advancing the recognition of the greatest nation on the Earth," (as well as the most popular), "to all corners of Alaska... or Canadia..." (yes, he says it like that) "...Or... wherever we are." His gaze wanders off toward glazed again. Then his voice drops as if he may not be talking to anyone else. "Or just waiting for the next thing to happen." The sentence trails the rest of the way off and he goes back less to looking around the place slowly and more covering the place with a slow-turning and blank stare.

After another sip of her coffee, Doreen gives a nod.

"Why'd you have to stop watching, Shelly?"



Tippy-Toe waves to the pair and approaches with a smile.

"Hi there fellas! I'm Tippy-Toe, nice to meetcha! Hey, I hope ya don't mind me askin', but have you seen anything weird around here?"

Moondragon nodded safely. “Yes.” With a beneficent half-smile, she said, “You will say this often.”

In response to Iceman's question about Jessi, Ed gives Holling a questioning look. Holling gives him a single nod. "Holling and Jessi got in a fight." Ed says.

"One-hundred and seven stitches." Holling says, pointing a thumb over his shoulder at his back.

---

Shelly tells Squirrel Girl. "I got addicted. It was baaad."

---

Out in the forest Bob and Doug squirrel talk to Tippy-Toe. "Well, that depends on what you think is weird, eh?" Bob says.

"Yeah, do you like consider using a weights and measurement system based on factors of 10 weird? Cuz if you do, then no, this is America, not the Great White North." Doug says.

"But if you think little green hosers from space with wrinkly chins are weird, then yeah, the place is lousy with weird." Bob says.

"Or that one with the giant head and tiny limbs in the rocket chair." Doug adds.

Tippy-Toe blinks at the boys and tries to process what she just heard.

". . . Hey, would you guys like to make a friend? I've got this friend named Squirrel Girl, and she's a human who can talk to us. She's real nice, and would really like to hear about wrinkly chin people and a big head in a rocket chair. That sounds like the sort of thing I offered to find for her."

Iceman shrugs, drumming his fingers on the table. "Eh, I've seen worse."

He looks over at the U.S.Agent, who seems off in his own world. He arches an eyebrow. "Hey, Earth to Uncle Sam. Everything OK in there?"

Bob and Doug the squirrels shrug at Tippy Toes. "If she's buying the beer, eh." Then they follow Tippy Toes back to the Brick so they can report to Squirrel Girl.

Back at the restaurant, Tippy-Toe comes tippy toeing in, scurries over to Squirrel Girl, climbs up to her shoulder, and starts chittering away.

A moment later, she motions over to Moondragon.

"Hey, c'mon back over here, you're bothering these nice people's customers!"

Moondragon sighed and rejoined Squirrel Girl. A surface mind-scan of Dorrie showed that she worried about more urgent matters. “They seem far too solipsistic to feel any genuine bother. Their consternation isn’t what truly concerns you, though.”

Her eyebrow twitched upward in mild interest. “Oh, really?” She stared down at the squirrels. “You are certain that this darling in the pink bow heard correctly?” Heather’s hand hovered as if she wanted to pet Tippy Toe, but she withdrew it.

In Squirrel Girl’s mind, she heard Moondragon’s voice. Contrary to what Iceman & Beast often told people, it was NOT like chewing aluminum foil. I have dealt with...what the native squirrels apparently saw. That concerns me.

In reply to Moondragon (msg # 70):

Moondragon feels the telepathic static start to increase like a musical crescendo. It gets to the point where everyone else can feel it in their heads as well, even though they're not telepathic. Then the noise cuts out and they "hear" a voice in their head yelling, "CUT! CUT! CUT!"

The denizens of Cicely stop what they were doing and start filing out the door. As they go, their earth clothing starts to shift into purple jumpsuits and their skin stars to shift into green. As this happens, their ears elongate and become pointed and their chins take on the signature ridges of the skrulls!



The group follows the mob outside where it starts to line up in a military-ish formation and looks down the street. After a few moments, the group notices three silhouettes start to take shape through the haze. There's two roughly humanoid shapes flanking something that looks kind of like a floating egg. As the trio comes closer, the group can start to make out more details.

The one on the left has bear-legs, red robotic arms, one of which is carrying a large disc-shaped shield with a hammer and sickle emblazoned on it. It has a matching insignia on its belt and a gold cross on its chest. Its blue cape flaps in the breeze behind it.


The one on the right has long, gorilla-like arms covered in shaggy orange fur. Its legs are stocking, like a little-person's and covered in the same orange fur. It has a stylized white and red maple leaf symbol on its chest and a black and white starburst pattern on its shorts. There's cloth belt around its waist covered in native American symbols, holding a large leather satchel at its hip.


The one in the middle is a huge head with tiny limbs. The head is extra deformed, being elongated and proportioned as much taller than a regular head. It sits inside a hight-tech rocket-chair that gives it mobility that it obviously would not be able to achieve with its diminutive limbs.


The giant head-thing speaks/broadcasts into your brains. "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS UNSCRIPTED INTERLUDE!?" it demands.