"Pipe down you two." It wasn't clear which two he meant. "Sarge will explain the mission when he knows we are ready to hear the mission. Now until then, I suggest a bit more introductions are necessary. We can all gather our specialities by simply looking at each other, look he has the biggest muscles and this little guy likes fire and is a modern artist. But I can't for the life of me expect that this guy is just gonna make us cookies the whole time, but if you are, that's fucking awesome and you're my favorite!

"Short story long, what can you all do? Me, I'm the head. Team Leader. El Jefe. I talk for the group and make sure we all come across as badass. Some of you have referred to it as kiss-ass, it would be better if you began to refrain from such nonsense. Now then, what can you do, Sorin?"
This message was last edited by the player at 17:01, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

The goblin bursts out laughing and falls to the ground. He keeps going on. Really? Mike doesn't know a damn thing! He ponders something as he laughs 'Reall? No one leads anyone here. If anyone thinks I will follow them they are insane. Finally he calms down and looks around for his half a cookiee. Finding it, he gulps it down and wipes off his lips. The goblin takes the other half and puts it down near the cat. All of this for a bunch of hardened criminals? Seriously? Sooner or later everyone will fight the others.Sooner or late. It will happen. No one leads Kholt. Well besides the guy that can blow him up! He sits down and starts to draw again. Perhaps its his oulet "Kiss-ass kiss-ass..." Scribble scribble "Kitty! Meow!" Is he completely nuts?

"Oh, any time friend. Cookies are, indeed, delicious. Perhaps when I get to town and can find some decent tea. No point in making things without the appropriate.. ingredients."

After Mike's request for quiet, Hil shut up.

He just stared at Mike as he spoke, deadpan for a few seconds as he proclaimed himself the boss, before laughing hysterically.

"Oh, sorry, don't mind me. I just remembered something hilarious. Please, continue oh Captain my Captain.

Marcia looks at the sergeant and looks at the brown nosing, insecure thug that declared himself in charge while demonstrating the leadership skills of a playground bully.  “How much time from sentence?” She asks the sergeant quietly in her calmest rasp. She gives Reign, Naeva, Glitterdake, Sorin, and even Kholt a skeptical, and slightly pleading look.

Grinning as he hears Hil, he blurts out rather loudly "Captain Kiss-ass! Captain Kiss-ass!" Wow. He goes back to drawing. Again.
This message was last edited by the player at 17:08, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

Sorin growled at Mike's question, pulling at the collar of his armor enough to expose his tattoo. "Only two people in this world get to call me by that name, and you're neither of them. You call me Fox," he said before covering the distinctive marking back up. "As for what I do, you could call me a locksmith, and an arcane layman. That good enough for you, boss?" He spat the last word in a mocking tone of voice, making his thoughts about Mike's claims evident.


This message was last edited by the player at 17:12, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

“I’ll never remember that. Your name tag says sorin so you’re sorin. Want to change it? Get a marker and write a new tag.”

He didn’t mind the name calling or lack of respect one bit. He expected it, therefore there was no need for rebuttal. He was slowly getting the info he needed.

“And you, Mister Boom Boom Dynamite TNT! Surely you do something amazing???” He asked Kholt

Whistling, the goblin keeps on drawing and doesn't look up. Scribble scribble "Bite me Captain Kiss-ass." The retort comes out and he puts a hand to his mouth as if ashamed but then it lowers and a wicked grin comes across his face. And then he does a raspberry before going back to drawing.

Reign listened, glancing up at times to put names to faces, note the predictable blustering that came with mortal masculinity, ponder the pyromaniac pep-talk. There was no such thing as 'getting used to' this. At least for him. There was only the acceptance that came with the diligent discipline of running from one's duty. Though Reign had been running his whole life. He still got caught.

Sia's nod is replied to with a tilt of his chin; hoofstock maintenance would be a necessary skill if the mission required it. Until they knew anything more, how would they know what skills they would need besides spilling blood? The fact that their handlers gave them their equipment back was notable enough. Hell, they gave him back his firearm; they really wanted someone to bite the dust to give him back such a deadly weapon.

Reign gave Glitterdale a soft shake of his head to decline the cookies. "No. Thanks, though." It was an alarmingly kind gesture, though being that they let the man here, and he hadn't seen them before, he couldn't help but wonder what were in those sweets. More accurately, he couldn't bring himself yet to think of eating sweets while his pops ate gruel and grubs in their cell.

Like rain to oiled sails, the loud one's words completely unaffected the firearmist. But they didn't go unnoticed. Instead of responding Reign took another draw off his smoke before unclasping one of the silver latches on his bandoleer. He peeked inside and sighed, smoke curling over the side of his face. He had to wonder if anyone had taken a peek at his ammo cache.

Ten. Ten powder-packed pellets, wrapped in thin paper packs.

Plenty.

“How much time from sentence?”

"Who knows?" Even mumbling, Reigns voice held the ring of a crystal bell sounding in the deep. Clear, low, pure. If Sia could catch it - at just the right angle behind Reign's head - there was the faintest ring of that rosegold halo.

"Could depend on the body count." The wink he gave her was easy to notice on a face as mute as mourning.

He was grateful that the man he referred to mentally as the Fox preferred it that way. Made things a little easier.

"Bite me Captain Kiss-ass."

Reign raised an eyebrow ever so gently. Not at Kholt's reaction...

That guy was still talking?

"I'll have questions on the mission," Reign says, clearly to their handler and not dad body, before he takes another pull and says, "once we know what it is."

He points his head straight up, releasing the smoke from his lips in perfect orbital puffs. Glitterdale's cookies made him think of his pops, stuck back in his cell, eating shit for snacks.

We'll get you out pops.
This message was last edited by the player at 17:45, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

If looks could kill, Sorin would have murdered Mike twice over. His hand began to drift to the hilt of his sword before stopping, seemingly thinking better. He folded his hands behind his back and began pointedly ignoring Mike, looking to Kholt. "childish, I like it. What're they saying you did to get in here?"

Rolling his eyes at Sorin's comment, the goblin keeps on drawing. He taps the ground a few times and then looks up at the magus. No words. His face now looks crestfallin and he looks like he wants to start crying. The goblin curls up near his backpack, hiding his face.

"Intentionally antagonizing the guy who sneaks around after dark with magic and carries a shortsword? Very brave of you, Captain!

Now me? I'm just a humble priest of Azathoth.

I summon things from beyond the void. Monsters. Acid. Healing, flesh devouring energies, that sort of thing. If any of you get injured I'll try and heal you in the morning after doing my prayers.

Also, I'm not completely blind to the ways of etiquette and diplomacy."

Hil began chewing his cookie, offering thanks to Glitterstar. He wondered if they contained human flesh. Ah well, they were probably cooked if they did. Impressive if he pulled that off while in jail!

"I'll get to the point. This first mission will likely be less dangerous and more political. Near our ocean city of Kingsport there have been a disturbing number of scarecrows appearing during the night and surrounding the town. They are never around any fields and in a more bizarre twist, are all armed for some reason. In addition, a prince of neighboring nation has gone missing around that area. We are using you as a useful resource to look into this, recover the prince, if possible, and all without causing an international incident because you are a band of rogue criminals instead of any part of our country. Any questions?"

Mike clasped his hands together like "amen" and bowed slightly to Hil. "Thank you."

Then he got a bit closer so not everyone could hear, "The healing and flesh devouring...I uh...not that I expect you would wanna heal the likes of me...but...the flesh devouring kind will work better on me. If you ever feel like keeping me tip top."

When Banner ignored Mike completely is when Mike silently blew a fuse. "I'll show you all a kiss-ass."

Mike ran right up to Banner and kicked him in the butt, channeling all the dark energy he could into that ass. If only...if only he was wearing shoes maybe it would have gone better.

-----
11:46, Today: Mike Bison rolled 8 using 1d20+3.  smite good. +3 charisma if he's good, which still won't hit, so I fully expect to have my head blown off now. thanks.

 As a swift action, the antipaladin chooses one target within sight to smite. If this target is good, the antipaladin adds his Charisma bonus (if any) on his attack rolls and adds his antipaladin level on all damage rolls made against the target of his smite. If the target of smite good is an outsider with the good subtype, a good-aligned dragon, or a good creature with levels of cleric or paladin, the bonus to damage on the first successful attack increases to 2 points of damage per level the antipaladin possesses. Regardless of the target, smite good attacks automatically bypass any DR the creature might possess.

In addition, while smite good is in effect, the antipaladin gains a deflection bonus equal to his Charisma modifier (if any) to his AC against attacks made by the target of the smite. If the antipaladin targets a creature that is not good, the smite is wasted with no effect.

This message was last edited by the player at 18:49, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

Looking up from his spot he watches Mike swing a kick at Banner. Immediatly he curls up into a ball expecting the so-called bomb to go off and explode sending bits and pieces of the Dhampir all around the room! Here lies Mike aka Captain Kiss-Ass. May he rot in peace.He waits for a moment and pops his head up. Whats he thinking? He -wants- to see him explode. Big fiery explosion! The goblin waits looking like a kid at a candy store!
This message was last edited by the player at 19:11, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

At Kholt's reaction to his words, Sorin stared in small confusion before refocusing on the sergeant, taking in the orders with a nod. As he was preparing to respond, he saw Mike decide to commit suicide and his eyes lit up with a sadistic glee as he ducked into his still open cell. He didn't want to get chunks of a dead man all over himself after all.

 Sergeant Banner was at a loss that one of them would be so foolhardy. He was prepared to drop his attacker, but figured he needed to show the group the runes were indeed not a bluff. Focusing on Mike and then snapping his fingers, the explosive went off. The effect was dramatic, but localized, not risking much damage to anyone next to the now headless man.

 SGT. Banner wiped himself off and looked back to the group.

"I say again, any questions?"

Glitterdale asks.
Do you know how many scarecrows?  What has happened to the scarecrows found?
What is the name of prince that gone missing and do we know why he was in the area?

Finally he had Banner's attention...

In reply to Glitterdale Dust-star (msg # 46):

"The number of the scarecrows seems to increase every night. There have been some efforts to dispose of them, but so far not much more than a few pranking children vandalizing some.

As for the Prince. He is Halim Kushar. Not directly in line for the throne, but still enjoy the benefits of his wealth and royalty. As far as I am aware, he was in Kingsport on a mission of entertainment and self-indulgence. His welfare and whereabouts is more important than the silly Scarecrow army, however, as they say, two birds, one stone."

"Wow that was amazing Large Sarge! I guess Mike really was a kiss-ass after all. He died wanting your approval. He he he."

Wait.

Was she there the whole time? Hanging on the rafters???

"He He...Someone help me down."
This message was last edited by the player at 22:02, Fri 23 Apr 2021.

Sorin stepped out of the cell, smirking at the headless corpse. Fixing his full attention on the sargeant, he answered with his own questions. "I only have four questions. Where was the prince last seen exactly, will transportation be provided to said location, what kind of time frame do we have to get this done in, and lastly, can I dig through and keep any of his shit that I like?" he asked, pointing to the corpse.

"Thought you didn't like him, Foxy Loxy. But now you want souvenirs of your time spent with Mike. Awwwww."

She purrs from the rafters.

"Now does anyone have a ladder or a trampoline or something? I'm ready to come down."

Sorin looked up at the woman hanging from the rafters and shrugged."Just because he was an idiot doesn't mean he didn't have nice stuff. Be a shame to let go of any potions he might have had, for example."

"WOW!" The goblin stares at the headless man and he grins. He gets up rather fast and gets up to the body "Go boom? Boom boom." Kholt pokes at the body and he tilts his head "Fire? No no no." He sighs and looks down at his feet then looks up at the rafters and reaches up but he is too short and bites his oversize mouth and looks over at the dead body then pokes it again. "No no Kiss-ass." He yawns "Bored now. Go play?" He attempts to poke his head where the mans head once was as if to mock him before going back to his backpack and his odd arm thing and holds it tightly "Draw now..." He goes back to his scribbles.