Roll 3d6 for each Attribute:

Strength (STR)
Dexterity (DEX)
Charisma (CHA)

Roll your Spare Change (£1d6)

Roll your Hit Protection (1d6)

List your PLAYER’S age.

Then I consult the 100+ Failed Professions. I gave you one (or maybe two) Professions based on your highest and lowest attribute spread. If you don’t want that, roll d100 and you’re stuck with the result. Your Spare Change and HP determine your starting possessions and quirks.

The age of the youngest player at the start determines who your party owes £10k to.

Here is Thaco, somehow and old man tired of adventuring but he owes, he owes, off to adventuring he goes...

09:13, Today: RPGuru rolled 9,5,10,6,3 using 3d6,3d6,3d6,1d6,1d6 ((2,2,5,1,3,1,3,2,5,6,3)).

Thaco, you are a failed Verminator. You have a gas gun (d6, bulky, blast, only affects things that breathe) and a tox-mask.

6 pounds - Multisetting Bird Call - can attract or repel

HP 3 - Companion - Nightmare Moth. Anyone but you sleeping in the same room with it is beset by horrible nightmares. When they wake up the moth takes the form of something from the nightmare.
This message was last edited by the GM at 15:32, Wed 08 Feb 2023.

Is there anyone here younger than 29?

11:20, Today: Smoot rolled 12,17,14,5,1 using 3d6,3d6,3d6,1d6,1d6.

STR 12
DEX 17
CHA 14

Spare Change: 5
Hit Protection: 1

50.

Thaco

STR 9
DEX 5
CHA 10

Spare Change: 6
Hit Protection: 3

Age: 60

a gas gun (d6, bulky, blast, only affects things that breathe) and a tox-mask.

6 pounds - Multisetting Bird Call - can attract or repel

HP 3 - Companion - Nightmare Moth. Anyone but you sleeping in the same room with it is beset by horrible nightmares. When they wake up the moth takes the form of something from the nightmare.
This message was last edited by the player at 17:26, Wed 08 Feb 2023.

Smoot, you are a GOOD DOG
Collar, Bite (d6)
5 pounds - Your precious master died of old age. You are Deprived if in a hospital or nursing home.
1HP - you are bound to another character. If they are in danger you can ignore Critical Damage but still die at STR 0.

Thaco could use a dog. Perhaps he hunted vermin with me, dogs love doing that.

I am asking Chris if he intended for Good Dogs to speak Bastionese.

Worfhand

I was a Polar Bounty Hunter.
I have a pole axe (d8, BULKY).
I have an adoring follower (1hp, club, d6).
I have Seathirst. I can only survive on saltwater. Freshwater doesn't quench me (which also means freshwater will not restore HP).

STR 12
DEX 9
CHA 10

Spare Change 2
Hit Protection 6
This message was last edited by the player at 18:38, Wed 08 Feb 2023.

In reply to Baboonsandmoons (msg # 10):

What is your follower’s name?

if it's not too late, I would like to take the physical challenge roll the d100:
13:47, Today: Smoot rolled 96 using 1d100.

In reply to The Conductor (msg # 11):

Podder! Thanks to the Into the Odd Bastion Cast of Thousands table!

Exotic Food Supplier

large bucket of pigeon tongues (used for candy)
Long fork (d6)
Reciprocating bird caller (can duplicate any bird call)
5 pounds

1HP

You sold to the Hungry Hole, which burped out a skeletal companion (1HP) (A DOG!) as payment.
This message was last edited by the GM at 19:32, Wed 08 Feb 2023.

Warfhand and Smoot:

Roll 2d6 for each of your companions’ attributes.

Sure thing!

17:16, Today: Smoot rolled 11,10,6 using 2D6,2D6,2d6

Smoot and…TOOMS!

Your party owes 10K New Pounds to:


Stubb Prosthetics: You each have a rudimentary prosthetic, but it cannot be a limb.

In reply to The Conductor (msg # 15):

Today: Warfhand rolled 6,10,8 using 3d6,3d6,3d6.

Actually it's 2d6  :D

NOT TODAY!

Haha, whoops. Okay, here's the adjusted rolls:
10,5,6

10:23, Today: Sparky rolled 12,6,13,2,1 using 3d6,3d6,3d6,1d6,1d6

STR 12
DEX 6
CHA 13

Spare Change: 2
Hit Protection: 1

47.

Sparky: Oops! We already have a Noble In Waiting!

Please roll d100!

18:29, Today: Sparky rolled 63 using 1d100.

In reply to Sparky (msg # 24):

Sparky you are an AMATEUR DRAMATIST!

The whole world is a stage, but you’re not good enough to get paid

You get: A wig and costume collection

Specialty: Crocodile Tears - you can cry on command

Prop you still have - a barely trained STAGE COW (3hp, d4 bite)

Roll 2d6 for her 3 stats.

And you need to tell me what your prosthesis is (not a limb)

Also your cow has a prosthetic back hoof made of iron-coral (d6 against attacks from behind)
This message was last edited by the GM at 00:45, Sat 18 Feb 2023.

Awesome!  Free license for dramatic over-acting.  This will be a blast! :)

Here are the rolls for Matilda's stats.

23:27, Today: Sparky rolled 10,8,6 using 2d6,2d6,2d6.

For my prothesis, let's go with an artificial gluteus maximus.  An unforgiving patron sent their attack dog after me due to a botched performance.  I avoided any essential damage but my backside was not so lucky.  I always sit down with an audible "clank".

So Sparky is artificially thicc.

Alright
Think I got the hang of this

11:10, Today: Zikko rolled 11,6,8,1,5 using 3d6,3d6,3d6,1d6,1d6 ((6,4,1,2,2,2,4,1,3,1,


STR 11
DEX 6
CHA 8

HP 1
5 £

A real contribution to the team!

Player age 37
This message was last edited by the player at 19:14, Mon 20 Feb 2023.

Zikko Bagshaw - you are a DISINHERITED SOCIALITE

you have a Claymore (d8, Bulky)

3 bottles of fancy wine

Frilly shirt

5£ - You have a Duelling pistol (d8) your sibling has the matching one.

1 HP - you have an Unstoppable Rod - when thrown nothing stops it’s movement including gravity. Will eventually wind up in space regardless of trajectory

You like the others are in debt to Stubbs Prosthetics- you have a rudimentary artificial body part that is not a limb.
This message was last edited by the GM at 20:06, Mon 20 Feb 2023.

In reply to The Conductor (msg # 30):

The unstoppable rod is obviously his prosthetic

17:30, Today: The Conductor rolled 12,2 using 3d6+2,d8.  Demonstration . –

Dude - even for Electric Bastionland that sounds rediculously dangerous.

I LOVE IT