What you smell before you is one Benjamin Hyjackulus Scristos, although you can call him Ben. If you take bigger sniffs the smell goes away faster and the tears in your eyes might dry away just enough to allow you to see Ben in more detail.

Standing before you is a small man disguised as a garbage heap. He is unshaven and (quite clearly) unwashed. You may note with interest the myriad straps hanging around his shoulders, each one attaching to his wiry frame some kind of pouch, flask, trinket or jee-jaw. It is quite plain that this man is a hoarder of the highest pedigree. You wonder if, perhaps somewhere about his person, he might have concealed a bar of soap.

But, alas, no. It would seem that young Ben here prides himself on the offence he causes to your olfactory organs. Don't get too close now.