Benny Cowell has 'made it'.  At age 33 he has it all.  Wife, kids, house and a job he's one of the lucky ones....

Benny grew up in the Gardens and like most lads did nothing at school but unlike kids born just a few later managed to grab an apprenticeship before the arse fell out of the economy and training and jobs for the kids became a barely remembered fantasy.

Benny is a qualified tiler and plasterer and after learning his trade is on a good number.  Sure, he still does 'foreigners' on the side and of course his gaffer Neil has him grafting 60 hours some weeks but life is good.  Having a job, and a trade in this day and age is priceless.

Benny is married to a 'cracking bird' (as the lads say).  Tracey's a lovely lass and they cut a fine pair when he takes her out on Friday.  They've a couple of girls aged 7 and 5.  Benny dotes on Andrea and Sarah, little cherubs he hardly believes possible he has made.

He's up to his neck with the mortgage but is managing, buying a semi in Spennyworth, 'the nice bit' of Shaddingham.  The bit where the aspirational working class move to in order to pretend to be part of a class they will never belong.

Not that Benny has lost his roots mind.  He still considers himself one of the Gardens and no-one would dare say shit about him being 'posh' now.

Family man.  Grafter.  Decent bloke.  Benny Cowell is the poster boy for Thatcherite Britain and the poster boy for 'hard working families' everywhere.

Except when Saturday comes....



On Saturdays Benny is someone else.  On Saturdays all the frustrations of the week, all the behaving himself and all the  effort to be a good Dad and husband goes out of the window.  Because on Saturday he's got football.  Because on Saturday he's got his mates.  Footy, booze and a good scrap - what could be better?

On Saturdays Benny is the 'top lad' of the Shaddy Squad.  Best hooly firm in Division 3 by far, and if you ask any of them, if the numbers were right the best firm in the country.

Benny's motto is, 'Never been done, never been run,' and it's a badge of pride.  He rose through the ranks in the Squad and as what often happens the top lads grow up and slowly begin to behave, he is now the one the kids look up to.

Benny has pride.  He's never gone down, it's his job.  He's took a few pastings but given loads more out.  It's a pressure he relishes.  If he went down, the rest of the lads would scatter and his reputation in tatters.   It's part of the territory.  They seek each other out.  A grudging respect knowing that taking another firm usually means sorting their best lad out first.  All the top lads know it...

Benny is old school.  Strictly fists and boots.  Not like those Scouse cunts with the Stanley's or  those cockney bastards  with their knuckle dusters.  Never do a lad in when he's had enough - that's a cunts trick.  Everyone likes a ruck but no one wants to end up dead.  Never touch a scarfer, kid, woman or pensioner.  Everyone knows who is up for it and who isn't.  Slapping grandad means you're out.  It's not hard is it?  Find their boys, do 'em in and have a laugh about it afterwards.

Why does he do it?  Pride.  Pride in himself, pride in the lads.  Pride in his team and city.  And because it's a laugh, and it's exciting.  Anyone who says otherwise is a liar.  Watching some cocky bastards flee for their lives after their best lad has gone down like a sack of shit.  Feeling fucking terrified as some little bastard not yet shaving is swinging a car aerial at your face.  Slipping into pubs in two's before a yell of, "SPARROW AGGRO, SPARROW AGGRO, 'ELLO, 'ELLO" as pint pots start flying.  No one wants their pub done...

Benny's a decent geezer.  The kind of lad who has the phone numbers of a few top lads from other clubs who he respects.  Meet for a pint and have a laugh about battles won and lost.  No one likes or wants a paggering but one day it will come and you have to be ready for it.  Don't hold a grudge.  They all ask for it in a way.  Anyway, one day he'll be done and that's when 'he'll settle down', or one of the kids coming up will be fucking ferocious and no-one will say 'owt or show disrespect but the firm will have a new 'top lad'.  Shit happens, and worrying about it won't change it.  Why let it get in the way of having a laugh?

Benny's te top lad for a reason, and it's not just because he's handy.  He's with the boys 100%.  Don't bottle it and you're in with him.  He's more respect for the lad who doesn't run and gets a kicking than the harder lads who can dish it out but leg it from the Old Bill or if outnumbered.  He's no truck with those NF fuckers either.  In the Squad everyone bleeds Shaddy Red irrespective of the colour of their skin.  In any case some of those black lads are fucking vicious and fearless when it matters.  Who wouldn't want them backing you up?  Indeed, if the NF tried to organise at the ground they'd be booted off before they can shout 'Heil Hitler'.  Not that he's political mind, but whipping one of us, is whipping all of us isn't it?